“So let me get this straight, I have sex with you, live on your yacht for a week, we take a few pictures together, and then…money and emeralds?”

“What’s your money like?”

What he’s pretending to hear: “…and that’s why nuclear fusion is currently impractical as a mass-production energy source.”

What he’s actually hearing: “Aw, crud. I think the sequins on my hem are coming loose.”