So Pauley Perrette Is Probably Going To Kill A Homeless Person

Three months ago, NCIS star Pauley Perrette was allegedly attacked by a homeless man outside of her house, and then later tweeted a screenshot of her computer where she recounted her tale. Uncommon, but not improbable. At least until yesterday, when Pauley was allegedly attacked by another homeless man, and then later tweeted another screenshot of her computer where she recounted her tale. Now, I’m not saying there’s a suspicious pattern here, but there does seem to be a constant variable who claims to be stopping random attacks by invoking magical spells. I’m sure it’s nothing.

“I rebuke you satan in the name of Jesus Christ.”
“I have a tactical knife.”

Yup, all of this is going to end well. I don’t know why I acted so concerned in the headline. False alarm, everybody!

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