Paula Abdul is Completely Sane

March 3rd, 2011 // 29 Comments

On Valentine’s Day, Paula Abdul made a seemingly frantic 911 call that would lead you to believe she was being kidnapped. Turns out she was just having an argument with her boyfriend who didn’t feel like pulling over on the 101 to let her out while cars whizzed by at 85 miles per hour so he’s a regular Chris Brown. Now I know it sounds bad to take the side of her boyfriend with literally no evidence to prove he wasn’t being abusive, except oh, wait, there’s a recording. Via RadarOnline:

Abdul later calmed down, asking him, “Are you gonna drop me off ’cause I have emergency on the phone?” before telling the operator, “He’s dropping me off.”
She later told authorities that the verbal incident had passed, and she was no longer in need of assistance.

I seriously wouldn’t be surprised if they released the rest of this tape and it’s 25 minutes of her getting pissed at MC Skat Kat for not taking the wheel while she shakes up a martini. “Are you gonna take the wheel? I have emergency on the line. – He won’t take the wheel. – Seriously, take the wheel. I’m not joking around. – Can you have an officer waiting for me? This asshole’s being ridiculous. *shaking sound* You see what you’re making me do?”

Photos: Splash News, WENN


  1. Seth Rogen's vagina

    this just proves women shouldn’t be permitted to drive cars, use telephones or speak.

  2. Speaking of bat shit…….

  3. Richard McBeef

    I would have dropped her off on the shoulder and told her to take one step forward and two steps back… into oncoming traffic.

  4. eatme

    …i would just like to say that I am very disappointed with fish and the superficial:
    I downloaded my copy of Tila Tequila Uncorked last night a full month after it was released. I expect fish to keep me on top of these things.
    (PS. typing this hurts like hell considering all the chafing on my hands)

    • I just got it in the mail today from, I don’t expect it to be especially spankable, due to her huge implant scars and black edged beef curtains, but I’ll try anyway.

      • eatme

        …i think it is awesome. mind you, i was in to tila long back before she added the “tequila” (back when no-one had heard her speak and before the scars) so this has long been overdue.

  5. fuck paula

    i hate to admit. but i watch american idol becuz my gf watches it. And I must say, in retrospect, Paula did a bettter job as a judge than any of the new judges. Cuz now there are a whole bunch of really really bad talent on the show. They all suck and if Paula or Simon was still there they would’ve kicked out the shitty talent and the bad talent would still be bad but not as bad as it is now.

    • Any Guy

      I always say to myself when those horrid promos for that show burn my eyes, “who the fuck is watching that tripe?”.

      yeah, you watch it because your ‘GF’ watches it. riiiight. dude, own the fact that you’re a ruh-TARD.

      if you’re not a 14 year old girl and you watch American Idol, you are seriously a pea-brained mongrel.

    • your gf doesn’t let you leave the goddamn room while she’s watching vaginized television shows?

      How about you buy a fucking x-box or something.

  6. johng

    i would fuck her in her diarrhea encrusted anus and draw a smiley face on her face with my shit covered dick

  7. She is so pathetic and getting so little love here, I had to make a “pity” comment.
    Now you have 10!!!!

  8. Tuck and roll you crazy bitch…

  9. mel

    she reminds me somewhat of kim kardashian. both are just shy of full blown mental retardation. they both have horrid voices. and they both seem like they’d have to shave 2 inches above their bellybuttons to completely remove their unseemly pubic orchards.

  10. testington

    I hope she gets charged for calling 911 without reason, that is a crime

  11. Crazy women are great in bed. Egomaniacs are horrible in bed. I can’t remember, was she an egomaniac or crazy first?

  12. “straight up now tell me is it gonna be you and me forever oh oh oh , or am I caught in a HIT AND RUN???” Art portraying life …

  13. Snickers

    She looks about five years older than Kim Kardashian. She’s got a great plastic surgeon.

  14. LOL @ the entire last paragraph.

  15. miss_glitter

    I’m just surprised she didn’t mention tiger blood since she used to be Charlie Sheen’s sister-in-law.

  16. Paula Abdul 911 Call
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s old and unstable – but I’d still fuck her

  17. Paula looks great in these photos…and when you compare them to this video from, what 15 yrs ago…still HOT!! and still got the moves! Check out her and Janet Jackson, from the “80′s

  18. delredd

    f**k u richard mcbeef u a asshole i hope u fall 2 sleep n never ever wake d hell up. i wish u would wake up in hell muthaf**ker 4 sayin’ things about paula abdul. i loved this woman since’89 and i still do paula is so beautiful inside/out. if u don’t like her 2 freakin’ bad don’t go 2 her cite at all. i hate whitney houston & m&m but i do have common sense not 2 go on their site 2 make rude ass comments about them, so again richard mcbeef f**k u. do not say anything else about the lovely, pretty ms.paula abdul.

  19. delredd

    mashley, i love ur good comment on paula abdul. she ‘s still beautiful since ’89. i love paula abdul 4-ever my girl!!!!!!!!!

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