Patrick Stewart Is A Treasure

August 28th, 2013 // 25 Comments
Patrick Stewart
WATCH: Patrick Stewart - Quadruple Take Masterclass

Here’s Patrick Stewart just hanging out with his 35-year-old girlfriend Sunny Ozell and teaching her such secrets of his trade as the quadruple take in response to a woman’s hindquarters because Patrick Stewart is one part your adorable grandfather, one part badass and all parts Patrick Fucking Stewart. Which is why I don’t buy the claims that he’s stoned because what the hell does Patrick Stewart need to get high on besides Patrick Stewart? The man probably wakes up in the morning tripping his balls off him. I hear if he looks at himself in a mirror, he’ll swear that chair just talked. And looks like Jonathan Frakes. (I’m a lonely, lonely man.)


  1. I like that he’s listening to Stevie Wonder in the background.

  2. Why is a 35 tear old is married to this guy? Because he’s Patrick Fucking Stewart.

  3. dontkillthemessenger

    I’m shocked he’s even going out with that old.

    BTW, did I mention I love the internet? Imagine the trippy shit Alfred Hitchcock would’ve been putting out if it existed when he was old? I imagine it would’ve been similar to the creepy Jim Carrey-Emma Stone video.

  4. I love this guy. I will never be as awesome as he is.

  5. Deacon Jones

    I miss getting stoned everyday.

    Now I’m an irritable asshole.

  6. Get ready, internet, for the oncoming barrage of Patrick Stewart jokes a la Chuck Norris. My ovaries tremble in anticipation.

  7. Stephanie

    I’m 30 and I would totally do him.

  8. I ran across some show from I think from the UK where some guy picks a celebrity up in his car to give him a ride someplace, and the whole thing is just their random conversations in the car. Patrick Stewart was the passenger, and just his casual conversation with the guy was compelling enough I watched half an hour of it. He is the balls!

  9. He’s the Locutest.

  10. Interred Ferguson

    She’s probably cute but her toes are freakin’ me right the fudge out.

  11. He is fucking awesome. Can we make him Batman instead? I am dead serious.

  12. Cock Dr

    The captain had a few glasses of wine that afternoon.
    Je l’aime


    (see if anyone gets that reference)

  14. Jenn

    I think the replicator mixed up and gave him a cup of scotch when he asked for Earl Grey.

  15. malaka

    *in serious michael dorn voice* : Captain. we are picking up detections of awesome on our sensors.

  16. tlmck

    In a related story, all of Patrick Stewart’s bank and investment accounts were found empty today. The whereabouts of his girlfriend are unknown.

  17. Seb

    Reminds me a bit of his scenes in ‘Extras’. Holy hell he was funny in that

  18. Jax

    Apparently they were married or supposed to marry……and Ian McKellan was supposed to officiate.

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