Paris Hilton, in sheer defiance of quarantine-worthy herpes, celebrated her 27th birthday this weekend and threw an 80s themed party where she showed up looking like Rainbow Brite’s cokehead sister. E! News also reports that Sam “Mixmaster” Lutfi was in attendance. He was probably pouring drinks all night and many partygoers went home feeling the strange desire to flash their vaginas. Even the men. Yup, Sam is that good. We should hang out. But no grave pissing. I just shampooed my car seats.
Photos: Pacific Coast News, Splash News

































she looks so sad! This just made my day. She is such a has-been, it’s beautiful.
She’s totally coming down off coke. She needs a bump dammit!
I feel like im looking at paris rick solomon year not a good sign isnt she suppose to be progressing not regressing
I feel like im looking at paris rick solomon year not a good sign isnt she suppose to be progressing not regressing
Paris doesn’t turn 27 until the 17th.
WTF?
I don’t care WHO you are, or WHAT the theme of your birthday is, you DO NOT let Criss Angel do your hair.
On a more serious note, can vaginal infections cause depression? Because she looks bummed out.
More and more, she’s looking like Sh*t, with a capital “S.”
OMFG look at her hand!!!!!…. veiny wrinkly old woman hand!!! eeeek.
Notice how creepy her publicist looks standing in the background? Creepy and orange.