Paris Hilton’s Boyfriend is an A-Hole

August 27th, 2010 // 56 Comments

When Nathan Parada burst into Paris Hilton‘s house like the benevolent angel of natural selection he was, it was just assumed her private security team handled the situation until the cops arrived. Turns out Paris is actually dating nightclub tycoon Cy Waits who was at her house and pulled a gun on the intruder which proves there is absolutely nothing Vegas won’t rob me of. TMZ reports:

Law enforcement sources confirm … Hilton’s BF — Vegas nightclub kingpin Cy Waits — told police that he and Paris heard loud banging noises coming from downstairs around 6:30 AM Tuesday … so he grabbed his gun and went to check out the situation.
We’re told Cy claims he spotted Nathan Parada peering through a window and carrying two knives — a large kitchen knife and a buck hunting knife.
Cy immediately went outside — with his weapon drawn — and ordered Parada to drop the knives and lay on his stomach. We’re told Cy kept his gun pointed at Parada until cops arrived.

You know that old saying about how a butterfly flaps its wings in the rainforest, I’m not held legally responsible for groping strippers? This is sort of like that except Cy Waits not only stomped on the butterfly, but proceeded to mate with an entire generation of tree frogs thus ensuring 10 months of winter. Followed by a tsunami.

Don’t fuck with nature, kids.

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. first

    first?

    • Mr. Nice Guy

      Boyfriend sounds like he did Exactly the Right Thing to me.
      Paris looks great in these pictures, love the stocking tops in #3!

      • horn dog

        She looks good enough to PISS ON

      • Bunny Foofoo

        Leave it to Paris to finally start dating someone intelligent(ish) at the exact moment someone tries to pull a hero and cleanse the gene pool. Good for her, bad for humanity.

    • bob

      i might be late but i thought paris hiltons breast were small. did she get implants?

  2. Taz

    Nice jugs

  3. BWC

    Who? What? When? Where? Why? Who gives a f*ck? Shoulda been a double homicide followed by suicide so I wouldnt have to hear about this type of sh*t anymore. Now show me some titties!!!!

    • Mr. Nice Guy

      You sound like a ugly girl who hates the pretty girls who steal the spotlight.
      Oh, that is what you are BWC.
      Now I understand BWC = Big Wrong Cunt

      • Mr Nice Guy Eats Dick

        BWC doesnt sound like a chick at all moron. The “ugly girl” comment doesnt really apply in this situation. Big Wrong Cunt makes no sense either. Just thought I’d stop by to tell you that you’re stupid :)

      • michiez

        that was the stupidest thing ive read all day. and ive been on perez hilton today!!

      • michiez

        Not to you mr nice guy eats dick, lol

    • Mr. Nice Guy

      You might be right about BWC being male, but no man I know uses “titties”.
      I also do not know any men that want a hot piece of ass like Paris hurt.
      FYI – Well we know michiez must be an ugly girl who hates the pretty girls who steal the spotlight.

  4. joe@joe.com
    Commented on this photo:

    Where did the TA-TAs come from!??

  5. kane

    here-here… capital idea

  6. goes to show you can never own enough guns. or water bras.

    • Mike Hawke

      AAAHHHHHAHAHAHAHAahaha….oh. Nevermind.

      • fish i get the headline but careful you dont spawn the next eric rudolph/robert bardo. someone last week, maybe you or todd accross the way brought up chaos theory. around one in 20,000 americans are murderers. you have 22,000 facebook friends, albeit some foreign. the hiltons have the money to blame anyone for nathan parada..

        just sayin..

  7. The tits look nice… Other than that, who gives a fuck….

  8. anon

    You really do have to give credit to the person who designed her push up bra. Genius!

  9. lalalal

    * Cy Waits

  10. kurgen99

    I don’t get it? Sounds like Cy did the exact right thing. David Lee Roth did that once as well with a shotgun at his home in Pasadena.

    • dkjkf

      That’s the thing. If Cy weren’t around, we’re hoping the knives were there for a reason – to save humanity from having to hear about Paris Hilton again.

  11. sobrietyisacrutch

    Sometimes I don’t understand the Fish at all.
    This is one of those times.
    “Butterflies in the rainforest”?
    “Groping strippers”?
    But, then again, I’m not that sharp. I never did get the ending of “Twin Peaks”.

  12. Gus
    Commented on this photo:

    Where/when the fuck did she get those tits???

  13. This entire event was staged by Cy Waits in an effort to win the confidence of Paris HIlton, it’s a very common tactic in underworld crime.

  14. Even though he’s probably a total douche, why is he an asshole in this situation? Like a lot of people have stated, when someone rolls up on yo crib you have to handle the situation. Sounds like to me dude straight up handled his business. His choice of damsels in distress however……

    • sobrietyisacrutch

      He’s an asshole because he may have stepped up, but it was for PARIS HILTON – thereby dashing our dreams for reducing the gene pool.
      It’s kinda like the rehab folks being assholes for releasing Lindsey Lohan.
      And the court system.
      And UCLA.
      And Michael Lohan’s sperm.

  15. JRS22

    Her boyfriend is an asshole? Were you expecting him to invite the “fan” in for some tea and crumpets?

  16. Kelley

    Jesus, that must be one mighty push-up bra to get that much cleavage out of Paris Hilton, wow !!

  17. snipss

    Cy – runs the two biggest clubs in Vegas – XS and Tryst… if you want to get in VIP http://www.siennaentertainment.com

  18. Obvious
    Commented on this photo:

    “loud banging noises” were her head slamming into the headboard just before the intruder showed up. Who’s this guy trying to fool.

  19. Gus
    Commented on this photo:

    Where/when the fuck did she get those tits???

  20. castlekissy
    Commented on this photo:

    fake blond

  21. castlekissy

    fake blond

  22. Commented on this photo:

    Did she get an ass transplant to the chest area?

  23. slowontheuptake

    From B-cup to slobberknockers? How is this possible?

  24. captain america

    that’s a nice coïncidence: SHE TOO, folks!!

  25. captain america

    ……….I mean tha ASSHOLE in her.

  26. Cock Dr

    I see she was busted for cocaine in Vegas last night.
    YAY!

  27. john p

    where did that cleavage come from?

  28. oldfool

    Wonder how long until we’re reading about Paris and Tiger?

  29. Yowza!

    Stupid whore just got arrested in Las Vegas, for possession of cocaine. What a dumbass…

  30. Galtacticus

    A-rod,A-hole.when are these guys finally learning to take decent names?!

  31. Nero

    Do we have to praise or curse this guy!? What’s Paris Hilton market value at the moment!?

  32. Gando

    How do you navigate simplicity through a complex branche what the whore business is? Admitted it isn’t always easy for these Hollywood bitches …

    • Rhialto

      I wouldn’t use the word ‘simplicity’.'Simplicity’ can refer to something genius as well.Maybe ‘simpleton’ would be in better place.

  33. Haters gotta hate. Must be from all that waking up and looking in the mirror every morning while preparing for a typical day filled with self-righteous indignation. Eventually you’ll find the correct meds to suit your affliction, or the razor blades, I’m sure.

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