Oprah Might Actually Run For President Because of Trump

“The failing internet always says I helped Jenny McCarthy kill kids. Sad! Am I doing it right?”

Since Donald Trump has proven that all you need to do to win an election is lie, figure out how to game the electoral college, shit on Islam, lie, collude with Russia to smear your opponent, lie, tell white people they’re oppressed, promise to dismantle our entire social safety net because Americans are too stupid to understand how much they rely on it, and lie an orange metric fuck ton more, it’s become painfully clear that anyone with enough money to have their face constantly on TV can be president. Cue Oprah Winfrey considering a run in 2020. *does math* Nope, not enough baby boomers will be dead by then. She should definitely still run just to accelerate that process though. Via PEOPLE:

Winfrey was quick to say that before, she had brushed away any suggestions that she could be president, thinking she didn’t have the requisite political experience.
“I never thought about the question,” she said. “I never even considered the possibility. That’s what I thought.”
But after Trump, who had no political experience before entering the White House, was elected, she’s seeing things in a different light.
“I thought, oh gee, I don’t have the experience, I don’t know enough,” she said. “Now I’m thinking, ‘Oh. Oh.‘”

Setting aside the fact that Michelle Obama already has poison cheesecake ready to deploy for this very reason, it is kind of interesting that when comparing Oprah and Trump, they’re not so different after all.

1. Both billionaire narcissists who splatter their singular name brand all over everything they touch.

2. Both have subservient significant others, handpicked to never detract from their spotlight.

3. Both ran charity scams as tax shelters, except whoops, nope, that was only Mandarin Microdick McTinyhands who did that.

Also this:

Am I going for the “pee stuff” joke any time I can even if it’s a huge reach? You’re goddamn right I am.

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