Everyone Relax, Octomom Says Her Kids Aren’t Molesting Each Other. Wait, What?

October 12th, 2012 // 34 Comments
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And welcome to the exact moment all of this stopped being an only slightly horrible guilty pleasure of a train wreck to look at. TMZ reports:

The nannies do not say Octo personally sexually abused the children — but according to one of the nannies who spoke with CBS, “(One of the boys) would take (his sibling) away and take her to another area. And he would be touching her.”
“She never did (anything). ‘It’s okay, don’t worry about it.’ That was her attitude.” the woman continued.
According to the report, the nannies also claim they witnessed Nadya tie her eight newborns to their bed with cheese cloths around their waists to keep them from getting out of their cribs … and also blocked the door to the kids’ bedroom with a chair from the outside so she could nap peacefully.

In Octomom‘s defense, child services has not locked her up after investigating the claims which she says are the result of the nanny’s wanting to take her eight kids for themselves which, in their defense, is the natural reaction to seeing who their mother is. I hate children and I almost tried to adopt them. Although mostly just to put them in a hot air balloon and release it out into the Pacific to give them an actual chance at life. Anyway…

“All of this is blatant lies,” Suleman says … telling us the nannies are trying to “sell lies” to the media because they’re upset Nadya and her family moved out far away from their former home.
Nadya says she had a bad feeling about the nannies — one in particular who developed a troubling obsession with her kids.
“[The nanny] wanted to do her best to KEEP my eight [for herself].”

Okay, this all sounds reasonable, but could Octomom maybe completely undermine her whole defense by saying something ridiculous. Let’s see that:

Nadya adds, “[The nannies] are hating because they can’t have what I have.”

And balance has been restored to the universe even though that potentially means her 14 kids really are molesting each other. Who wants ice cream?

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Splash News


  1. USDA Prime McBeef

    seal off the house, run a hose off the exhaust pipe of the minivan, give it a few hours.

  2. Dude, as much as this lady is crazy, DCFS has been there like a million times. Shit’s fine. That being said, I wonder how often her uterus falls out every day. “WHOOPS! how embrassing! can one of you push this back up there? I’m making dinner and my hands are all messy!!”

  3. Cock Dr

    Did anyone honestly think this sick piece of work would raise healthy normal kids?

    • BlinkyTheFish

      Wasn’t expecting a pedo version of Lord of the Flies, either.

      • JC

        True enough. I expected the regular old Lord of the Flies.

      • Cock Dr

        You lack imagination.
        It’s just a matter of time before she’s selling kid vids to distributers in Berlin and the Netherlands. Why should she get naked and finger herself on camera for Happy Meal & hair styling cash if the kids can do the hard work for her?

      • Yeah, I saw that video of hers. She’d better start either looking for alternate revenue streams or consider doing something kinkier on film… like maybe shoving a parking cone up her ass.

  4. kimmykimkim

    This woman is a terrible piece of shit. I didn’t think she could possibly make me more sick than she did already. But lo…

  5. Octomom Gym Spray Tan
    Dirk Diggler
    Commented on this photo:

    What the fuck is going on with her foot ?

  6. Salad Face

    Gunt says to Octomom “You brought this on yourself, lady.”

    • Sandoucheky

      They need to make a superhero named Guntman – basically a man on a furious search for gunters and baby gunters. Octomom with a few more pounds would be his Moby Dick.

  7. Octomom Gym Spray Tan
    Commented on this photo:

    “We are reporting live, from the cavernous vagina of Octomom!!”

  8. Carla

    So when is SHE endorsing Mitt Romney? Because that’s what’s trending with all the hoors of style and substance.

  9. Octomom Gym Spray Tan
    Commented on this photo:

    is that a diaper in the crotch region? or just one of her kids?

  10. logan

    Box her up and mail her to the Middle East. They will straighten the vile and discusting creature right up.

  11. Sliver

    See that bunching of fabric near her crotch…that IS her uterus.

  12. Octomom Gym Spray Tan
    Commented on this photo:

    Take that John Ham!!!

  13. Octomom Gym Spray Tan
    Commented on this photo:

    It looks like another one is trying to fall out under that dress.

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