Presumably to promote her self-exploration cinema spectacular, or the now-cancelled stripper gig to promote said spectacular, here’s Octomom in Palm Beach posing for some just-released canned bikini pics. And if you’re looking at these going, “My God, who would have sex with this?” Dudes. Dudes will have sex with this. We’re disgusting. TMZ reports:
36-year-old Nadya Suleman arrived at LAX moments ago and her new boyfriend Frankie G picked her up outside. Frankie — a 23-year-old amateur bodybuilder — even gave her a peck on the lips when she arrived.
Sources tell us the couple’s been dating about two months and it’s getting serious — but the best part … when we asked Octo how they met … the burgeoning porn star replied, “Through church.” She wasn’t kidding either.
PASTOR: Dear Heavenly Father, as I come before you to prepare this week’s sermon, please fill me with your holy guidance and wisdo-
GOD: “Holy guidance and wisdom?!” Motherfucker, you let Octomom into my house. OCTOMOM. Comin’ in here after flickin’ her bean, all pickin’ up bodybuilders and shit. Bitch, you lucky I don’t give you leprosy!
(I bet you had no idea God talks exactly like Gwyneth Paltrow. I was surprised, too.)
Photos: Pacific Coast News
MY EYES!!!! AAAGGHHH THE BURNING!! MAKE IT STOP!!!!
shouldn’t she be on a pole? or in another sex video, since those are the only respectable jobs out there, so she can raise her 8 kids??
You forgot a few. She has FOURTEEN children.
lmao! I was thinking it was 14, but I thought that couldn’t be.lol
She really resembles uncle Fester. Someone give her a lightbulb to stick in her mouth !!1
She actually does resemble uncle Fester, thanks for pointing that out!
Mouth has been done. If she wants to impress anybody she’ll have to light that sucker using a different orifice.
Don’t sully the good name of Uncle Fester like that.
I just threw up in my mouth!
As opposed to your ass? Or your shoes?
“The Stargate that is her vagina” hehehehehehe I dunno who on here said it, but I giggle every time I see her since
Zombie love!
It’s drivin’ me mad
It’s makin’ me crazy, crazy…
Why– WHY can’t a zombie just eat her face already so we don’t have to see it anymore?
SERIOUS! or put a bag over it….
preferably plastic, drawn tight around the neck!
Life is not fair.
If you were forced to choose one which would it be, sex with Nadya or waxing and buffing John Travolta’s perineum? Suicide is not an option.
waxing revolta, no question. spread it on, grip and rip and it’s over. I can do that. Maintaining an operational boner with Suleman would be tough.
You gotta spend more time on the buffing, John really likes that baby to shine!
If he wants it spit shined, then suicide is a fucking imperative, not an option.
Question…. what are the rules concerning the use of popsicle sticks and duct tape?
To prop up your flagging staff? If the other party is game, go for it.
travolta cause he’s loaded (i know, poor choice of words) and at least he’d give me a decent tip after the happy ending
Come on…you know the answer to this (waxing Tra-vulva) and it wasn’t kind of you to ask the question.
Wax/buff Travolta.
I’d only use this bitch as a scarecrow.
You BASTARD!!
THINK OF THE CROWS. they’ll spend years in therapy.
Verily I sayeth unto you, if thee were to throw a hot dog into this fornicator, would it hit the sides of the hallway, or go straighteth into the 4th circle of hell.
Whateth the fuck? I thought you were omniscient?
Ye speaketh of the other God. The one with that filthy hippy son.
If this is standard sermonising, I will join your church.
It’s the one…the only…“Our Lady of the Gooey Uvula Discount House of Worship & HiFi Repair.”
Auugh. Gooey uvula.
*Bleurgh*
well I will now have to look at Jessica Biel’s butt once again to remove this from my mind… my hubby saw her vagina this morning apparently its frightening…
Kudos to you good woman! Allowing your husband to view another woman’s vagina places you on a special pedestal of which most men can only dream. I hope he treats you like the fine woman you are. On behalf of all married men, thank you for being you.
And yay when the devil did decend upon the earth, he came in for the form of a fake-breasted demon with no belly button….
Dead eyes.
Something tells me she is completely unaware that she is fucking ugly. I feel like somebody needs to tap her on the shoulder or something.
lmaoo!
Standing next to Nadya could elevate Rumer Willis to a 5. I can’t decide if that would be less painful than chin reduction surgery.
I believe she spent a whole pile of pre-babies money (obtained by means other than an honest day’s work I’m sure) on plastic surgery attempting to be an A. Jolie look alike.
She is so fucking creepy with those Uncle Fester eyes.
CD, you’re semi-inspiring me to come up with a parody song entitled “She’s Got Uncle Fester Eyes” (sorry, Kim Carnes). I already have the first line: “Her cunt’s a hollow hole…”
HAHAHAHAHAHA! I’d sing that at karaoke!
Which one of the kids took these photos?
One of them doesn’t know how to get rid of dark circles under her eyes?
You’ll regret that when she unleashes her mighty raccoon legions to conquer the world.
A zombie Angelina Jolie with big, flapping baps.
What did we ever do to you, Fish?!?
Read the headline, Johnny… Fish hates us.
Somehow still less terrifying than Paris Hilton as a DJ or a Spice Girls reunion.
i disagree. this trainwreck actually has eminent consequences that matter. very unlikely to have a happy ending
Let’s put a smile on that face
Yeah (cocks head to the right) why so serious?
And all the seagulls on the beach that day puked up their fish.
… while the fish in the ocean puked toxic waste.
Well, I’ve learned something about myself today.
I will stare at double D tits no matter what they are stuck on.
I hate myself.
I don’t know what to tell you, I’m the nations #1 tit-lover and I’m still flaccid after seeing these pics. flaccid and thinking about cancelling my florida summer vacation
Just lay off the G&T’s for a week 7 you’ll be fine
if fish or photo boy actually cared, they would at least blur out the face
Fish, Chuck Norris and Jack Bauer will hunt you down for this!
The Bible said the Devil will have many forms. Didn’t say anything about many kids.
It’s nice to see her as such a wonderful role model for her 500 children….
not the best angle.
Talk about mudflaps, my girl’s got ‘em…
And this is what a ZOMBIE in a bikini looks like… THANKS! BTW, Fish, up yours!
These pics are old, at least a week. C’mon Fish, you can do better! :: yawn ::
I can be a heartless dick a lot, but I really feel badly for her kids that probably love their mother and will one day google her name and read all about this episode in American history. Makes me kind of sad to think about it.
I bet Frankie G is just trying to hook up with her to molest the kids. He looks nasty.
Ahhhh hell nah! Uh-UH!! Fuck you guys in the face!
In spite of my better judgement, I watched a scene from her “Home Alone” video yesterday.
It was every bit as horrifying as you might expect. massive amounts of stretch marks and reconstructive scar tissue, combined with a vagina that looks like the result of a flesh eating bacteria infection.
But how was her bean flicking? (you don’t have to answer, I nearly threw up just typing that)
In my mind’s eye, I picture someone kneading dough for pizza. But the dough is all wet and red because it already has the sauce mixed in. So it is making a sort of slurping/sucking sound each time it is kneaded.
Oh…and I forgot to add the cheese. There is a lot of cheese being kneaded around in her pizza dough.
Damn Sparky, u tryin’ to kill us???
No. Just make you hungry for pizza.
i refuse to eat pizza… for at least 4 weeks.
I do, however, admire your sick fucking sense of humor.
With anchovies, I assume…???
And that white fuzzy stuff that grows on rotten food, and maybe mold.
McFeely, we thought you were dead. And now, after watching that video, I think you only have seven days to live. Rest in peace, dude.
I’ve missed you, dad!
I’ve been spending more time actually doing my job.
It’s not very satisfying.
There have been several infractions of your law while you were away, with no one to make things right.
While it may not be satisfying, McFeely, did this video at least make you appreciate your job a little bit?
So…no truth to the rumors that a firewall and/or censorware has kept you from the site? (I should add that I’m partially responsible for those rumors.)
that was you huh?
Finally, an explanation for Tropical Storm Debby.
her head looks like a play-doh creation with doll hair glued on top.
It’s like somebody put Kim Kardashian and Bethenny Frankel into a blender and this is what came out.
It’s like she climbed into the pod with Jeff Goldblum. OctoBrundle. Brundlemom.
Maybe it’s just me, but does she look like she’s wearing a mask?..like her face is about to fall off? She looks like a character from The Twilight Zone.
Listen up, Nadya…or perhaps you prefer Ms. Suleman. Or maybe Octomom? How about just Oct? Whichever…
Here are a couple of tips about hair-styling: shampoo…and BANGS!
Yeah. Bangs that reach your chin, you useless cunt.
At ANY angle is NOT her best angle! Only way she looks good is if she disappears!!!
I’m absolutely surprised that she spends so much $$$ on her hair and it still looks like that.
Damn she needs some undereye concealer those dark circles make her look zombie like.
Fish, why do you force me to confront the depths of my depravity? Yes, after half a doob, I would sex this thing, but do I really need that to be forced into my consciousness? This and the Deena Cortese photos are taking me to dark places of myself.
The answer is: smoke the 2nd half of the doob.
her leg is all one width… kinda creeping me out.
Her whole body is one width. Like an earthworm in a wig, I’m fond of saying.
Thank you for ruining it. I never looked past those giant tits.
hahahahaha :D
she looks diseased, but I’d play with those funbags….. then proceed to fist fuck her loose vagina.
Watch out you don’t fall in. Sick fucker.
With the cost of her new boobs, she could have afforded to feed her kids for 5 months. Sheesh. Soul-less.
They call those kankles. LOL!
roflmao. You really should tell your “photoshopper” that they do a piss poor job. With Hi-Def I can see all the shading & lines. Sadly even with 75% of you p.shopped, you can still see the scars & saggy skin. Poor thang.
Lookin’ possessed too. freaky
Crissy, I’d agree but she has too much saggy skin & fat for that. Nasty, just nasty.
No wonder her tits looked so big, the top is 2 sizes too big! Damn, can’t that nasty skank do anything right? lol
eeewwwww look at the wabbly skin, esp. on the thighs.
POSSESSED I tell ya!!!
wtf??? Her ass cheek…wtf is with her ass cheek?????????Make it stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There’s a penis growing outta her tit!!! OMG why can’t I stop?????
OK I just threw up…time to go
did he punch her in the face a few times when he picked her up too? fuck..
Poster child for ‘butt lifts gone bad.”