Moby dated Natalie Portman?! WTF?!

If I collapse in the middle of this post, it’s because I’m so chock full of nerd rage I’m ready to start opening action figures thus lowering their collectible value. I’m seriously that pissed. It’s kind of scary. Apparently Moby dated Natalie Portman a while back making him the target of my fellow geek’s hatred. Page Six reports:

“I guess in some people’s eyes, [nerds] might be mildly sexy – and, as a nerd, I’m certainly happy to enjoy some of the effects of that. But as far as the very brief affair that I had with Natalie, it’s made me a target of a lot of nerd wrath,” the techno-whiz tells next month’s Spin. “You don’t date Luke Skywalker’s mom and not have them hate your guts.”

First off, the prequels suck, so die and burn in hell for mentioning them. Second, I get chicks way hotter than Natalie Portman all the time. Okay, maybe not as hot – and they’re missing a couple limbs. But those ladies are dynamite in the sack. Or so they tell me before stealing my wallet. So, yeah, Moby, in your face!

Photo: Getty Images