And now back to the Golden Globes.
Not that I’m trying to go all Sarah Palin on you – *quickly erases crosshairs* – but here’s a quick look at the man who thought knocking up Natalie Portman would be an awesome idea. His name? Benjamin Millepied, which is only slightly less ridiculous than “Lord Smuggerton” which is what I was going to call him. I mean, just look at the guy. Every shot he’s making some snooty, “Yes, indeed, I diddled this,” face instead of screaming at people that he’s seen Natalie Portman’s vagina. Which is exactly what I’d be doing. Brad Pitt would be using Angelina Jolie as a stick to force me off the red carpet, that’s how romantic I’d be. But, no, not Master Benjamin here. That sort of ribaldry might spoil his tea.