Miley Cyrus Got Drunk And Ate A Penis Cake

January 25th, 2012 // 156 Comments

“Drankin’ sure does make me hungry for dem wiener cakes.”

Because the world needed to see them and be enriched by their presence, TMZ was awesome enough to fire over these photos of Miley Cyrus celebrating Liam Hemsworth‘s birthday on Saturday where she apparently got chipmunk-faced drunk (Still 19 by the way.) before someone whipped out her old pal the cameraphone which naturally ended with a giant penis cake getting a Mullettown Mouth Massage. It was practically her destiny.

Photos: Courtesy of TMZ.com

superficial

  1. MarkM

    I don’t mean to brag…but that looks like a pretty small cake to me.

  2. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Jill_Ess
    Commented on this photo:

    Miley to personal assistant: “I want the cake anatomically correct and be sure to include his current herpes sore.”

  3. ILoveFish

    Is that a herpes lesion on the head??

  4. JC

    Sam Kinison is alive? Yeah!

  5. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    God is Black
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn that penis has some bad herpes especially at the head?

  6. Sensei John Kreese

    I thought that a black dick cake was only for a Kardashian.

  7. JC

    My comment now makes much less sense after the photo change. :(

  8. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    FattyFatty2X4
    Commented on this photo:

    When did she turn to the Dark Side?

  9. Star Droppings

    In her defense, she didn’t know it was a penis. Her cousin always just called it the “kin-maker”.

  10. Why am I defending Miley?

    Okay, but who wasn’t drinking at 19? Isn’t Liam an aussie? If the party was there it would have been okay to drink.

    Damn, this girl was under disneys thumb (and he fathers) for the longest time. I’d want to get shit faced if I were her too

    • Nope. The party’s in the USA.

    • Really?

      Yes people drank at 19. None of us, however, were able to walk into a bar and openly order drinks while they knew we were under age.

      Shouldn’t the big question be why did her boyfriend want a penis cake?

      • Mandy

        But did anyone in the bar know she’s not of drinking age? As famous as she is, I’m sure a bunch of 30-something bartenders and bouncers don’t know how old she is.

        I agree about the cake though. Why would you give a penis cake to a guy?

      • You’re right, Mandy. Nobody remembers that she was just 16 when she danced on a stripper pole at the Teen Choice Awards less than three years ago. Or how a few months later she gave her movie producer a lapdance. Or that time two years ago when Perez Hilton posted shots of her naked cooch—when she was still underage, which may have technically made it child porn. Nobody remembers that shit. And certainly nobody at a trendy L.A. hotspot.

    • Mike

      She looks 25. No one bothered to ask her. But the real reason, you don’t card someone who just dropped thousands of dollars on a party in your club.

    • Brooke

      I never drank at nineteen….

  11. Mandy

    It’s getting to the point that I feel bad for her, since she gets so much negative publicity for this stuff. She’s 19. I did worse things than this when I was 14.

  12. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    FattyFatty2X4
    Commented on this photo:

    When did Chris Brown have time to sit for this mock up with all the woman beating?

  13. Deacon Jones

    I love how the tip of the dick has a giant herpes lesion on it…..I wonder if that was built that way, the rest of it is untouched.

  14. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    This picture is brought to you by the Union of American Hebrew Congregations. Always hire a certified mohel to perform your circumcision!

  15. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    “Daddy says if I lick it right here, the cake will get bigger.”

  16. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    joe
    Commented on this photo:

    Disney prostitot===========II===porn star

  17. Ben Dover

    god I hate slutty hillbillys

  18. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    Miley tweeted with this pic with the line, “Keeping up with the Kardashians, y’all!”

  19. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Tim
    Commented on this photo:

    fap fap fap fap…. ahhh teen jerkoff material.

  20. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yeah, I’ve seen the cake. It’s big but it ain’t to scale.”

  21. Good Luck Charlie

    Demi lovato, Britney, Miley, these Disney kids always grow up to be so lovely and well adjusted.

  22. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Grand Dragon
    Commented on this photo:

    Ray J is laying under that table with the gloryhole.

  23. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    tim
    Commented on this photo:

    i want to teabag her hot little face so bad. then fuck her mom

  24. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    “What would top lickin’ a big choc’late cock…hmmm…a lesbian reachar—Cheryl! It’s like you read mah mind!”

  25. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    whip
    Commented on this photo:

    you know how we call this in the netherlands?
    …………LATE PUBERTY, folks!!

    • mismy

      U guys missed Forrest!! I’ll do it– STFU Forrest

    • Sajid

      It’s just because she is foamus people care. Teenagers go through this stuff and if kids are going to copy her because she is her/an ex-disney star then their parents are didn’t raise them completely right because they should have taught their kids to not copy other people because they are foamus.

  26. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    “Happy birthday, Liam. I’m so glad we got together. And broke up and got together and broke up and got together again.”

  27. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Alyssa
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s that liquid running down her legs!! That can’t be sweat!!

  28. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Snack pack
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Liam’s cake needs to learn to wipe front-to-back, not back-to-front. Good thing Billy Ray learned his daughter how to be a good girl and help out.

  29. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Alyssa
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s the big deal?? She’s 19! Living young and wild and free!! It’s not a real dick!! It’s a cake!! I prob would have done the same thing!! She’s just having fun!! I actually love this pic!! Stop hating ya’ll!!

  30. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    If I was her father, I’d be a bit disturbed at how authentic her face looks in this picture.

  31. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    Bobby Jones… you’re doing it weird.

  32. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    The hillbilly handshake.

  33. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    layhertease
    Commented on this photo:

    Let me guess… he’s not slipping Miley the tongue. He’s just trying to lick the cock cake frosting off of her lips. Why oh why does Liam have a cock cake for his birthday? Makes one wonder.

  34. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Evil Dick Tater
    Commented on this photo:

    Sinead contributed the difficult brown frosting BTW.

  35. Snack pack

    Let’s give her some credit. At least she didn’t whip her tits out and try to give it a really feeble titty fuck.

  36. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, for MY birthday, could you get me one of those big black penises? I don’t mean a cake.”

  37. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Diggy
    Commented on this photo:

    If it works for Kim K, it’ll work for white mouth.

  38. Alex for Billy Ray

    That dang ol’ hussy gunna git it when I git home frum this dang coal mine! That ain’t vury Chrishin like!

  39. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim Kardashian is extremely jealous.

  40. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m noddin’ my head like ‘Yeah!’
    Movin’ my hips like ‘Yeah!’
    Lickin’ black cock like ‘Yeah!’
    Got my hands up, they’re playin’ my song
    And now I’m gonna be OK
    Yeah! It’s a party in the USA!”

  41. Wait, if this was a DUDE’S birthday party, why was there a penis cake there? Did she bring it herself?

    • TheListener

      Good question. Maybe he wasn’t there and she was celebrating his birthday while away from him. Otherwise, it doesn’t make sense. A straight dude would not want a penis cake at his party.

  42. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    “Your Honor, I’d like to introduce this picture as Exhibit A.” —California Dept. of Alcoholic Beverage Control v. Club Icon (2012)

  43. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    After seeing the chocolate penis cake, Miley found herself wanting to suck every long black implement she could.

  44. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    When your boyfriend gets a giant penis cake for his birthday…well, how many warning signs do you really need?

  45. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Commented on this photo:

    Ironically, this is actually a step UP in classy behavior for Miley.

  46. Miley Cyrus Penis Cake Drunk
    Debby
    Commented on this photo:

    oops, I left my reply on the wrong comment!

  47. pretty vacant

    uh im thinking if mileys boyfriend gets a penis cake on his birthday, chances are hes really not all that into miley.

  48. “Happy Birthday! Here’s a cake shaped like a giant, black cock!”

    Hilarity ensued when a drunken Liam tried in vain to shove it up his ass.

  49. A Ridiculous

    Looks like Jeter’s Penis made a surprise visit to Miley’s party.

  50. stupid is, as stupid does

    With each passing week she becomes more White Trash.

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