Miley Cyrus’ Parents File For Divorce

This, uh. This explains a lot.

Billy Ray and Tish Cyrus are calling it quits after 17 years of marriage. There’s no talk of a third party, so to make this more scandalous, I’m going to say it’s Miley. People reports:

“As you can imagine, this is a very difficult time for our family,” they say in a statement. “We are trying to work through some personal matters. We appreciate your thoughts and prayers.”

Want to know the creepiest part about all this? Britney Spears’ parents also divorced – after 17 years of marriage. It’s like that episode of Fringe where Massive Dynamic tried to raise test tube children under the exact same conditions. Except instead of acquiring mind control, these two become undue burdens of the state after suffering a psychological break from squeezing out redneck children because they ain’t done know any better. Goddamn you, Walt Disney. Goddamn you to hell.

Photos: Fame