Michael Jackson Used To Prank Call Russell Crowe

“Fuckin’ Gladiator? What did you say to him?”
“I said, ‘Excuse me, do you have Prince Albert in a can? About how old is he?’ A tee-hee-hee-hee.”
“He ain’t one of us no more. He ain’t one of us more. He ain’t one of us…”

I have an entire gallery of Taylor Swift with a wedgie, but before I get to that groundbreaking news, here’s Russell Crowe revealing that Michael Jackson spent years making prank phone calls to his hotel room a.k.a. one of the greatest fucking things I’ve ever read in my life. Via The Guardian:

The zenith of Crowe’s fame does sound a bit disturbing in other ways. For one thing, he found himself on the receiving end of repeated nuisance calls from, of all people, Michael Jackson. “For two or three fucking years,” he says. “I never met him, never shook his hand, but he found out the name I stayed in hotels under, so it didn’t matter where I was, he’d ring up do this kind of thing, like you did when you were 10, you know. ‘Is Mr Wall there? Is Mrs Wall there? Are there any Walls there? Then what’s holding the roof up? Ha ha.’ You’re supposed to grow out of doing that, right?”

“Blikey, this is the Crowe.”
“Is your.. hee-hee, hee-hee.. is your refrigerator running?
“Excuse me, mite?”
“I said, I said.. hee-hee, hee-hee.. is your refrigerator running?”
“Um, I think so.”
“Well, then you better go catch it! Or give it some Jesus Juice, Jesus Juice makes things not run. Hee hee hee hee hoo hoo hoo!
“Who is this?!”
“You’ll never found out! SHAMONE!” *click*

Photo: Getty