Mel Gibson buys bowling alley for island

February 13th, 2006 // 46 Comments

gibson-bowling-alley.jpgMel Gibson is having an eight-lane bowling alley shipped to his private Pacific island in northern Fiji. I guess he felt it was finally time to splurge a little. I mean, buying an island is fun and all, but you haven’t really lived until you’ve got your own bowling alley. His next purchase should be giant bags with money symbols on them. He could fill them with cash and just leave them piled all around his home, occasionally filling one with bricks and hurling it at poor people.

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superficial

  1. giant bags with money symbols on them!!!

  2. HollyJ

    He must be very proud to have made so much money off the martyrdom of Jesus. What a champ.

  3. After he gets the bags all he’ll need are three nephews named: Huey, Dewey & Louie – lol

    The Mad Dater,
    “Because there’s a Bastard in all of us”

  4. Binky

    Sounds like his new flick will be an ‘Island of Dr. Moreau’ remake – only with bowlers. Creepy.

  5. PapaHotNuts

    When contacted about this, Sgt. Murtaugh claimed that he was too old for this shit.

  6. Caught Dead In That Dress

    You mean throwing moneybags filled with brick at poor people is… wrong?

  7. spamnews

    No, he’s gonna be nice to poor people. I hear he is hiring a bunch of Ethiopian Jews to work as pins in the bowling alley. This guy is all kindness and smiles.

  8. Realistic

    Did you mean money bags filled with poor people?

  9. Devil Is Chrome

    PapHotnuts – I think I just laughed myself silly…

    Will you go out with me?

  10. rivercmb

    Nobody has the right to complain about this. Jesus was all about making a shitload of money and living an exuberant lifestyle. At least that’s what I figure it was from what I see most Christians and rappers on tv doing.

  11. PapaHotNuts

    Absolutely Devil. I’ve been waiting for you to ask.

  12. HeeHaw

    Is it just me, or is this site just completely hilarious today?? Even poster comments are cracking me up. It started with the Clay Aiken thread, (“rotate the picture 90 degrees to the left”…) and I’ve been laughing ever since. Now Mel’s buying his own bowling alley to ship to his own island, and the lead singer of Creed just might get drunk, beat his wife, then try to drink the lamp.

    I’m at work you know. I’m not supposed to be laughing this much. Especially when I’m by myself and nobody’s around. It looks suspicious.

  13. my_glorious_lawn

    I have tons of respect for Mel Gibson. However, if I had my own island I would not only airlift a bowling alley, I would airlift a strip club full of nasty, kinky woman. lol. While I am at it, this could very well be the start of some kind of new civilization on Earth, he may want to start cloning versions of himself to keep a close eye on his island, and put up signs, “this island is equipped with Mel patrol, all violators will be airlifted off the island”. I would also have my clones airlift a nice Starbucks, and have all of Mel’s clones working there. If any of them question who is the real Mel while I order a Latte, I will pull out my certificate of authenticity.

  14. tis GLAM

    WOW Gibson…Jesus must be proud of you.

    i hate these celebs buying islands. Who the hell do they think they are? They dont even put good use to them. Where’s the parties, booze, drunk all-nighters? i dont hear about these things happening in their islands. I need to buy an island.

    ~~P.S: dude,whats that growing on your lip?

  15. I wonder if he’ll make everyone wear dirty used bowling shoes?? Maybe that’s what the money bags are filled with.

  16. Devil Is Chrome

    PapaHotnuts, why don’t we have our first date at Mel Gibson’s bowling alley?

    Then we can visit Scott Stapp in jail and then go out for Thai food.

  17. Jonboy in SF

    Sadly Gene Simmons from KISS has trademarked the money bag w/dollar sign symbol (no joke) so Mel would have to pay him first. Or maybe they could work out a trade in free bowling…

  18. hafaball

    nothing left to do but bring all the jews there and…oh…nm.. O.o

  19. PapaHotNuts

    Sounds like a plan, Devil. I’ll bring the Funions.

  20. Tracy

    De plane! De plane!

    Maybe he’s creating a modern day Fantasy Island, where he’s Mr. Rourke in his snappy white tuxedo and he gets to fulfill some guy’s fantasy about being the best bowler EVER!! Then the devil comes in his black suit and tried to steal the guy’s soul… well, you know the rest.

  21. Sheva

    Mel rocks and is investing in more biblical epic productions. Seems Hollyweird can’t stand a good man. Especially one who when turned away made it on his own.

    Bowling is perhaps a bit boring to the more exciting “let’s dress up as a girl” and go offer some blowjobs jet set.

  22. ESQ

    Good keep him out of the U.S. from making movies like “The Last Tempatation of Christ.”

  23. ESQ

    Oh I spelled “Temptation” wrong – fuck it! Mel Gibson stopped being a good actor since the “Lethal Weapon” movies.

  24. Jayne

    I’m happy for him.

    …really.

  25. sfindlay

    What on Earth? No, Mel, you’re supposed to SAVE your money. And way to shove it in normal people’s faces that you can just have buildings AIR LIFTED to your door step… anyone else would just have it built, but suuure that’s cool.

  26. sailorairman

    If I were Mel Gibson I’d use the poor people as bowling pins.

  27. celeb_hater

    Looks like Holly has me beat with being filled with hate. I am a flower child compared to the vile that spews from Holly. Good for Mel for making tons of money on depicting a view of Christ that doesn’t demean him like the rest in Hollyweird do. He put up his own money and created a movie that no one wanted to touch. And he had the best grossing movie of the year. Kudos for him. You only could wish you could do the same but you are too busy being a troll on here. You are pathetic.

  28. Mugato

    Funny how everyone is making jokes and being lighthearted except for the Gibson fans. They’re all pissed off and self righteous. Hollywierd! That’s great!

  29. HollyJ

    Celeb probably saw the movie in the theater 31 times, all the while randomly shouting out in Tongues and waving arms in the air like Jimmy Swaggert.

    I have all the empathy in the world for you, you poor thing. But I recommend you take your next dose of whatever it is that you skipped this morning. =(

  30. beachedwhale

    I read this site for Holly J and Papa Hot Nuts’ comments. Keep drinking the haterade, my lovelies, it’s delicious and serves up 100% of my daily needs for cynicism and true celebreality.

    P.S. His lip fungus looks like Katie Holmes’…. maybe he is the father?

  31. beachedwhale

    I read this site for Holly J and Papa Hot Nuts’ comments. Keep drinking the haterade, my lovelies, it’s delicious and serves up 100% of my daily needs for cynicism and true celebreality.

    P.S. His lip fungus looks a lot like Katie Holmes’….could he be the father? If he were it would that explain that horrible onsie she was wearing last week- not a bad fashion choice at all but actually a hairshirt!

  32. LickyLicky

    HEY HEY HEY! DON’T GO DICKING ON THE HOLL-MEISTER AND THE NUTSTER.

    I need them whole and untouched for my evil plan of world domination.

    Or at least Vegas domination, right guys. Is it any wonder that slots sounds just like sluts after a few Cuervos?

    I love how the fan-atics (read unrealized lunatics) expect something less than total degradation and humiliation for the shiny-happy glitterati we make rich and famous.

  33. eyespy27

    its gonna be hard to bowl while nailed to a crucifix.

  34. slinkhard

    ‘Seems Hollyweird can’t stand a good man.’

    LOL. Yeah, the good just radiates from his racist sexist mouth.

  35. fame is funny

    i see many big lebowski jokes ahead….

    http://www.st-andrews.ac.uk/modlangs/filmstudies/images/american002.jpg

    NOBODY FUCKS WITH DE JESUS!

  36. This is just a guess, but I think Mel is actually a producer for the show “LOST”, and he is building the bowling alley for the season finale. Jack, Kate, Sawyer, and the rest of the gang need something to relieve some stress. Nothing helps reduce sexual tension like bowling a Turkey.

  37. GothamGuy

    Yes…what WWJD…nice Mel. I’m sure Jesus would buy an eight lane bowling alley. Everyone knows he would buy a 13 laner…you know, so all the disciples could play on employee night.

    In all seriousness, Mel Gibson is a fraud and doesn’t embody Jesus Christ in the least. That crazy guy he played in Lethal Weapon? If you go to iMDB, it probably says Mel Gibson — himself.

  38. GothamGuy

    Celeb_hater is scaring me. Who here actually thinks Mel Gibson’s portrayal of Christ was accurate…raise your hand?

    K…the short bus is over there.

    Let’s start with this Celeb_hater…Christ and His disciples did not look like Jim Caeveazlghagdg or whatever his name is. They looked more like people in the Middle East. So I’m sure Christ smiled on Mel for letting racism trump truth.

  39. brideoffrank

    Yes because Jesus also lived on his own island and bowled all day, it’s in the Book of Hal or something. I’m pretty sure there is a Bowling For Jesus league out there somewhere.

  40. LaydeeBug

    Say Devil, don’t you have Gibson’s reservation for a suite down there is hell? The Hellymoon suite? Free bottle of sulfer, being heated in a nice tin of brimstone, and a vase of burning roses and demon’s breath on the nightstand.

    Check out Family Guy’s Mel Gibson episode. It’s a scream. Shout out to HollyJ, PAPA, Licky and ESQ.

  41. innit

    LOL has anyone seen the South Park episode with Mel Gibson in it?

  42. yeshuafreak

    Your lack of knowledge of what a Christian is or isn’t is astounding. How God chooses to bless someone is up to Him. Sounds to me like a lot of people here are coveting. Often God blesses people so they can be a blessing to others and Mel Gibson give more than most celebrities.. he just doesn’t go around with a bull horn announcing it. All the money he made off the Jesus movie by the way HE DONATED TO CHARITY.. EVERY LAST DIME! Yes.. believe it or not, you can be rich and be a Christian. You don’t have to be a homeless person wandering the streets preaching on corners to be a Christian. That doesn’t make a person any holier than anyone else.
    Oh… and no one knows what Jesus looked like. If he had gotten a Palestinian Jew (as that was what Jesus was) then everyone would complain about something else..
    And Mel isn’t a racist anymore than you are anti-Christian. It was his father who has some warped views but you can’t blame him for his dad..

  43. Arguing on the internet is like running in the Special Olympics…even if you win you’re still retarded.

  44. GothamGuy

    yeshuafreak…You are so warped I don’t even know where to start. Mel Gibson was making the most important movie of all time and chose to (as you admit) cast according to what would please some fat Southern Baptist in Alabama. Glad you aren’t too concerned with Christians seeking truth.

    But your comments about charitable giving are right on. I remember the part in the Bible where Jesus made fish and bread for the masses and kept extra for Himself. Cause, you know…he gave enough.

    At least one part of your name is correct. BTW…Mel thinks you are going to Hell. Wait, is that anti-Christian…to blaspheme St. Mel?

    I always find its the self proclaimed Jesus freaks that least embody His way. I’m praying for you.

    And Rachel, awesome post! The brilliance is that you were arguing the downside of arguing on the internet. Guess that makes you…well, you know.

  45. gogoboots

    Mel is getting far beyond scary, have you seen the preview to Apolyptica, his new film? We’re not dealing with a full deck here. Australians are really like yahoos from the South, they just want bigger and weirder things like your own bowling alley because, hell, why not? It guarantees free publicity. Next it’ll be his own airport or something on the island. Actually I think that’s next on this wacko’s agenda fo’ sho!

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