I Wonder How The War On Christmas Is Going

December 12th, 2013 // 130 Comments
Megyn Kelly
WATCH: Megyn Kelly - 'Jesus & Santa Have To Be White'

*opens door, peaks head in*

“By the way, for all you kids watching at home, Santa just is white but this person is just arguing that maybe we should also have a black Santa,” Kelly said. “Santa is what he is and just so you know, we are debating this because someone wrote about it, kids. … Just because it makes you feel uncomfortable doesn’t mean it has to change. … Jesus was a white man, too. He was a historical figure. That’s a verifiable factas is Santa. I just want the kids watching to know that. My point is, how do you just revise it in the middle of the legacy of the story and change Santa from white to black?”

*closes door, slowly backs away*

superficial

  1. Brannie

    As a good Christian, I have to say this… Jesus was white? He was born in the MIDDLE-FUCKING-EAST, woman. I don’t think so!

    (I’m a good Christian, not perfect so don’t rag on my ass for swearing).

    • Art-Girl

      I think we can all agree that she’s not talking about the historical Christ, she referring to “American Country Club Jesus”. So as a character made up by rich GOP Reganites, he probably was white (and also “Christian”).

      • diversity hire

        He wouldve been about as white George Zimmerman then

      • Art

        White, not American you dumbass racists. The history for these regions show these people are white, not African, not Italian, not American. Not even Jesus. Bigots want to make everything about their race and she is addressing that.

      • Gumbatei

        Well, no. Jews in the middle east are white now because they’re not supposed to be there. Britain dumped them there in the 50′s. They’re all european. Jewish people in the olden days were brownish. Although maybe not black, most def not white. Just like Santa.

      • Mama Pinkus

        Country club dudes generally do not sport long hair – he was more like a Woodstock Jesus.

  2. Sigh. I know it’s tired to say this but: Aren’t there celebs in bikinis in Miami or St Barth right now?

    Serious question – are there other relatively SFW sites that have celeb pics?

    • Joe Benya

      So I get this right: you want more titties to spank to, and less talking smack about your Jesus?

      • The Most Interesting

        I want some beer, too.

        Can we make that an official feature request, Fish? Stop them worrying about the “mobile experience”, and get ‘em to whip up a beer dispenser for every time I click.

    • Yes, there are celebs in bikinis in most of the articles you skipped over in your rush to click on this one and whine and complain like the entitled little shit you are.

  3. It makes sense for Santa to be black. I mean, he sneaks into people’s houses without permission, right? RIGHT??

  4. This dopey broad went to my high school, I am sad to say. The local paper ran stories for a week straight when she went to Fox News but obviously they won’t say anything about this embarrassing garbage.

  5. *rabblerabble* *infuriatedwords*

    good game

    *slaps hand*

  6. Holy shit wow, they really are just a vile, racist network that hired vile, racist, entitled sanctimonious bitch like her, aren’t they? Santa is fake and Jesus being white are highly unlikely.

    • SANTA IS NOT FAKE!! YOU FUCKING TAKE IT BACK!!

    • lolwut

      lol

      ———————————————————————
      http://www.thesuperficial.com/julianne-hough-blackface-crazy-eyes-orange-is-the-new-black-10-2013

      El Jefe
      Here is a thought for black people that are offended by Julianne Hough. Maybe instead of being offended by something as innocuous as this you should be more offended by things like this.

      1. Learn the English language, like every single other person in this country does, including every group of immigrants from countries that don’t have English as their primary language. If the piss poor farmer from a small village in Vietnam can speak proper English, then you can too.

      2. Stop killing each other, especially over the most senseless bullshit.

      3. Pay fucking attention in school, you are the worst, most uncontrollable group of students. Find me a teacher that will say differently.

      4. Stop having kids with multiple partners and actually raise your kids. “Baby daddy” and “baby momma” are not terms that you should be proud of.

      5. Dress like adults and civilized members of society. Stop tattooing yourself up and down and then crying that no one will hire you.

      *Disclaimer, these criticisms obviously do not apply to black people who appreciate education, speak well and behave like civilized people and not assholes. If you are offended, then you might not be part of this group.

      Oct 28, 2013 at 1:31 pm / Reply /106
      ————————————————————

      • Ha ha, you are a fucking loser, really, stalker much?

        I stand by what I said in that comment you posted and I stand by my comment today, so you can go fuck yourself. So keep following me around, I hope my farts done stink too much while your nose is up my ass. Black people who are decent have no problem agreeing with what I said and the fact is I am sure they hate being painted with the same brush as the shitty black people who unfortunately make it bad for all of them.

        FYI, telling the truth about something is not racist, sorry to burst your bubble.

      • Oprah Sucks

        If your farts stink when they’re done, how do they smell when raw? With that question being posed, exactly what is a raw fart? Is it a gaseous excrement that has not “cooked” long enough in the lower intestine? My queries may seem trivial to you, but I have also found ebonics quite fascinating. What is it about the African American that causes them to coin phrases in such a way? What up, home slice?

      • I love it when commenters here get called on their hypocrisy.

      • Johnny Barbells

        …exactly …someone sounds muy butthurt.
        …as far as his original (quoted) post is concerned: he addressed it to “black people that are offended by Julianne Hough”, so, it obviously never occurred to him that maybe there were many, many, many of us decent, upstanding, educated black folk who were offended by it too, simply because of it’s racial insensitivity. (do a little research on the history of minstrelsy/blackface to understand why we don’t see it as “innocuous”)
        …as far as his new response is concerned: A) YOU are the very type of asshole who’s painting all of us with the same brush, and your head is too far up your own ass to even realize you’re doing it. B) you acknowledge that we (decent black folk) would agree with you, thus we’re already aware of the situation, thus we don’t need you (or anyone else) pointing out shit we already know, over & over & over again. C) equal opportunity criticism… where are your lengthy critical diatribes on other races and their flaws? are blacks the ONLY race who prey on their own kind, are uneducated & unemployable, get extensive tattoos, and have kids out of wedlock? white people, don’t do all that shit too? latinos? asians? russians? …no? …only blacks? …or is it that blacks just stand out in the minds of people like you? …you’re right, telling the truth is’nt racist, but, being selective with the truths you choose to tell…is.

      • and stay the fuck off my lawn you hooligans!

  7. well, at least they’re comparing the relevance of Santa to Jesus. that’s a start.

    ps – I hope Roger Ailes gets raped by pigs. Merry Christmas to all!

  8. How dare she leave out the incontestable fact that Jesus was also American!!! That’s heresy lady!

  9. Atheist here….
    So, Santa is white…He’s the creation of Northern Europeans. He’s a made up story, made by freezing cold white people who needed something to raise their spirits during miserable winters. Making a black Santa is like having Latin Grammy awards! (Hey oh!). No, it’s not a good analogy, but the story is about a fat white man sneaking into houses. Why people feel the need to create a black Santa, i don’t get. I mean, I sort of get it from a role model perspective, but the problem is the same with making Jesus white. HE WAS A JEW. And he probably looked a lot more like a dark skinned Jew or Arab in the middle east today than a blonde, blue-eyed Nordic guy. So, just keep the made up shit as it was suppsoed to be:
    1. Santa= Created by white folsk, he’s white
    2. Jesus=Created by dark-skinned semitic people so he’s NOT white

    • I like the idea that an entirely fictional entity must appear in the form given to it by the original creators of said fictional entity. My atheist ass feels like if you are just making up shit, make it up however you like.

    • Santa is a fictional character. He can be whatever goddamned color people want. Heimdall was white, didn’t stop Idris Elba now did it? The image of Santa has changed over the years, it’s not like he’s some immutable thing.

    • Gumbatei

      You have some facts mixed up. Father Christmas, Joulupukki, is a mythical figure form europe in the middle ages, mostly northern countries, including Scandinavia, Britain and Germanic countries. Santa Claus (Sinterklaas) is Saint Nicholas, the turkish priest. Victorians somehow decided to merge them both into the same figure, but before the 1800, they were two different myths. So yes, Father Christmas was white. St Nick, Santa, wasn’t.

    • I forget who said this, but it always seemed to be a fairly wise observation to me
      “God created man in his own image, and man simply returned the favor”.
      I like black Santa. If kids can get american girl and baby alive and barbie dolls in any ethnicity they choose, so that their doll matches their expectations / mirrors their own appearance, why not Santa? If I were black, I wouldn’t tolerate the concept that only the white man can bring the presents and other joys of Christmas to me and my family.

  10. Middle Eastern Santa + Jesus on next Kardashian Kristmas Kard. Calling it.

  11. Mohawk Disco

    Aaah, Fox News. I’m sure Comedy Central is greatly concerned about this up-and-coming new competitor.

    • cory

      The hightest rated liberal news show on cable is on Comedy Central!

      • Mike

        The Daily Show is a comedy show that talks about the news, but it is not in fact a news show. Just like Veep is not a documentary about the Vice President. Regular viewers of Fox news may not be able to make this distinction.

  12. Santa is an imaginary character created by Thomas Nast in 1862.

    “Nast first drew Santa Claus for the 1862 Christmas season Harper’s Weekly cover and center-fold illustration to memorialize the family sacrifices of the Union during the early and, for the north, darkest days of the Civil War.
    Nast’s Santa appeared as a kindly figure representing Christmas, the holiday celebrating the birth of Christ. His use of Santa Claus was melancholy, sad for the faltering Union war effort in which Nast so fervently believed, and sad for the separation of soldiers and families.

    When Nast created his image of Santa Claus he was drawing on his native German tradition of Saint Nicholas, a fourth century bishop known for his kindness and generosity. In the German Christian tradition December 6 was (and is) Saint Nicholas day, a festival day honoring Saint Nicholas and a day of gift giving.

    Nast combined this tradition of Saint Nicholas with other German folk traditions of elves to draw his Santa in 1862. The claim that Nast “invented” Santa Claus in 1862 is thus accurate, but the assertion overlooks the centuries-long antecedents to his invention.”

    http://www.achievebalance.com/data/articles/santa2.htm

    The modern image of this imaginary person called Santa was popularized by advertising campaigns of The Coca Cola Company in the early 1930s.

    http://www.coca-colacompany.com/holidays/the-true-history-of-the-modern-day-santa-claus

    If this character is imaginary, why does the color of character’s skin matter. The character is imaginary. Are people really that insecure? (yeah, I guess they are.)

    • The Interwebs

      “Santa is an imaginary character created by Thomas Nast in 1862.”
      15 seconds of Googling shows this to be BS.
      Nast may have been the first to draw the jolly fat man
      but the name Santa Claus had been around for decades
      and the character on which he is based for centuries.

      OK, children, now back to the titties …

      • …and before Thomas Nast he was described as everything from a “rascal” with a blue three-cornered hat, red waistcoat, and yellow stockings to a man wearing a broad-brimmed hat and a “huge pair of Flemish trunk hose.”

        Nothing to do with the image of Santa that is popularized today.

      • Gumbatei

        That’s because you only researched half of it. Santa Claus is not the same as Father Christmas. Santa Claus is the english interpretation of Saint Nicholas in Dutch, Sinterklaas. Only till the 1800 they started to refer to both of them as the same guy, but they were two wildly different concepts before that. That Thomas Nast just mixed them up.

  13. Ah crap, THIS changes everything:
    Zwarte Piet ( “Black Pete”) is the companion of Saint Nicholas (Dutch: Sinterklaas from which the American figure of Santa Claus is derived) in the folklore of the Low Countries. Like Santa Claus, Zwarte Piet is a hybrid stock character of pagan origin. In its modern form, the character is commonly depicted as a blackamoor, with blackface make-up, and dressed in stylized colourful Renaissance attire, akin to Maures in European heraldry, and similar to Moorish characters in the “Moors and Christians” Iberian folk festivals commemorating the Reconquista.

  14. I know one thing for sure. Yeezus is black.

  15. Another thing I know for sure is that blonde fox news fembot #15 up there is a cunt.

  16. mr. maddow's take,

    Jesus was multi-racial and bisexual and Santa is a wife swappin’ tea- baggin’ cracker

  17. I see more accurate reporting on THE SUPERFICIAL than Fox news

  18. Frank Burns

    All of this raises an interesting question: how does Mrs. Klaus looking a fur-lined Christmas bikini? Pics please.

  19. LuckyKK6

    Jesus was Jewish so more then likely he was white.
    Santa actually came about from St Nicholas (who resembles our present day Santa Clause), a christian, who devoted his life to helping the needy, the sick, and the suffering. He was also known as the patron and protector of children. Look it up…pretty interesting for those of you who care!…(Now back to bikini Pics of celebs)

  20. Slash

    I’ve never quite understood the people who claim to watch crap like Fox News as entertainment, but finally, I get it.

    “Jesus was a white man. That’s a verifiable fact.” – Fox News blonde

    LOL. Now I get it. That IS hilarious. They should get her to host the WH Correspondents dinner next year. Even Colbert can’t match that for lunacy.

  21. PassingTrue

    Before we stray too far off the purpose of this site, aren’t there some Victoria Secret models more deserving of our limited attention spans?

    • Hugh G. Rection

      Yes, but if you’re interested in hot chicks who say dumb things Fox News is usually a good place to start.

  22. rican

    Where does all this leave Chris Kringle at?

  23. Convex

    Santa Claus is a white invention. If the blacks want a Santa-like figure, let them make Kwanzaa Claus, or something equally ridiculous, instead of trying to corrupt everything because they’re incapable of any creativity that doesn’t include rap. It’s like a black remake of Steel Magnolias (bomb) or Annie (call it Boonquifa instead!). Being white and having white inventions/traditions is fine; it’s a shame the blacks can’t make their own, but then again, stealing from those more inventive and creative is what they tend to do. And NO, I don’t care if any of you disagree. Sticks and stones, people, and the libs are the least tolerant of differing opinions. :D

    As for Jesus, wasn’t he some short semitic dude? You know, dark hair and swarthy-ish skin?

    Can we please get some pictures of Hamm’s beast? Some of us want to see the cock!!

  24. Hey Fella, Are You George Zimmerman?

    There is no fiucking way Jesus could have been white. All of the whites (ie Aryans) lived in northern europe and were pagans. If Jesus were born Aryan, he would have been stooned to death for being a freak.

    Santa is an imaginary character. Therefore, he can be whatever-the-fuck you want him/her to be. My Santa is a stripper from Diamond Cabaret down the street. She just keeps on giving, as long as you stuff her g string with dollar bills.

    • I’d like to meet your Santa. Does she care if I wear sweatpants when I get dances from her?

    • Gumbatei

      Aryans were an indian race. Most probably non whites unless you believe the nazi interpretation of history.

      What you refer as “aryans“, are probably caucasians.

  25. cc

    Well, in keeping with this theme, I am throwing everyone black, brown, or asian off my Christmas card list. That is IT.

    • cc

      Actually, I just checked. My Christmas list was already down to just my parents anyway and my cat. Carry on.

  26. rankest thread EVER. FOX news sucks fucktard dick. ot make a issue of this is beyond moronic. as symbols of faith & fellowship (allegedly) why would you make race an issue? I mean stupid people will always do it but to suggest it’s ‘NEWS’ makes want to projectile hurl.

  27. alex

    This is really fucking funny. I wonder what it’s like to be so myopic, to have such tunnel vision, that the only possibility is that your opinion is fact. I bet it’s really liberating.

    I can’t wait to see what Jon Stewart’s team does with this tonight. I predict they will devote an entire segment.

  28. I am now stupider for having listened to that so-called “debate”.

  29. I’m pretty certain jesus had a nappy head.

  30. The Brown Streak
  31. Aggie

    Look at a fucking map, IF (and it is a mighty big if) Jesus existed (and I mean as a human, not as a magical fairy) he was absolutely NOT white. He would’ve had brown skin, brown eyes, and brown hair. (Assuming he existed) He was also a radical progressive for his era, and certainly has nothing in common with today’s bible humping conservatives.

    • You said it borther! (Or sister…your name is a bit ambiguous)

    • I’m Catholic, and I have not once ever seen a picture of Jesus in any Catholic church, school, etc. that depicts him as anything other than ambiguously brownish, although admittedly with more caucasian features than middle eastern. No doubt the popular common image of Jesus is a whitened up version of what he probably really looked like, but that’s likely just a result of people wanting their deities to resemble themselves.

  32. Not even going to bother debating the whole Jesus thing – he was from the Middle-East, therefore he wasn’t white. Period.

    As for Santa Claus… as a creation of the Coca-Cola Corporation in the ’20, of course he was white. Saint Nicolas, though, was a Turk. AGAIN, not white.

    Megyn Kelly, as it is the case of most anchor-person at FOX News, is an idiot.

    • Porkchop

      Actually Saint Nicholas was not a Turk, he was Greek. He was from modern-day Turkey but lived centuries before the Turks arrived. History!

      • … Still not white.

      • You obviously have a misconception about the Turks looking Arabic when in fact Turkish people of Turkey are very European in appearanace (i.e. WHITE). This brings up when, during the Cold War, the American media portrayed the Russians as swarthy/Arabic looking when in fact (we murcans know now) that the Russians are quite blonde and blue-eyed. In fact, there are probably more blondes in Russia than there is in all of the Nordlands.

  33. Bane

    Didn’t the History Channel do a documentary on what Jesus looked like and recreated his face with computer software?

    He came out looking more like David Geffen.

  34. Yy

    THESE are the people ruining Christmas. The ones that have to inject EVERYTHING with their hatred for others, the ones that are addicted to negativity and exclusion.

    This season is supposed to be about friends and family, having fun, and GOODWILL towards others, regardless of how they differ from you. You wanna “put the Christ back in Christmas”? How about acting like Christ (i.e. not acting like vindictive asshole)?

  35. kimmykimkim

    Holy black Jesus. This bitch is a fucking whack job.

  36. mary

    the real shame is that liberals had to wait for Ms Kelly to say something silly to get a “gotcha” from FOX News. With OCare exploding, Gitmo still open, and drones still killing into innocents in Pakistan, not to mention spying on Americans (especially those who do not agree with them), the overreaction to this is pretty sad.

    signed, a liberal

    • ReaganHuffsDongsInHell

      You being a liberal is as likely as Santa existing.

    • Shibo

      Thanks for bringing up obamacare, Mary. I think Jesus would have approved of insuring more poor people. I hope the bible thumpers will all get the chance to meet their maker some day and explain why they disagree. And I hope Jesus is very middle eastern looking too. :)

  37. cory

    If you want to go after stupid conservative women, stick to Sarah Palin, but leave Megyn alone. Besides being hot, she is very intelligent and a laywer.

    What did she say that is so outrageous? It is a pretty accepted fact that Santa is white. 99.9% of all drawings and graphics of him are white. You have as much of an argument that Santa is a women as you do him being black. Jesus was a Jew, who are also predominatly lighter skinned, compared to dark skinned Africans. I’ve been to Isreal many times and you don’t see many Blacks at all.

    • cmonreally

      How is this even an argument? Santa is a fictional character, no matter what/who he is based off. The actual Santa Claus is fictional, and people can have their own versions of a fictional character. The fact that she is presenting this as an afront to Christmas and Christianity is retarded, and the fact that people agree with the stupid bimbo is even more retarded.

    • Oprah Sucks

      Of course! lawyers are the most logical and socially responsible people in America. They are true sages of logic and reason. My lawyer brother would agree with Megan. The only problem is, he can’t comment because they took his crayons away in the nut house because he kept shoving them up his ass.

  38. tonycartman

    There’s white, and there’s “white”.
    Jesus was a middle-eastern, dark-skinned, Caucasian, “white” man with dark skin, brown eyes and black hair.

    There’s black, and there’s “black”.
    Jesus was not an African, black skinned man with typical African features, such as large lips, a flat, broad nose, low body and facial and tightly curled head hair. We tend to use the word ‘black’ to describe ‘negroid’. Jesus wasn’t “black” in this sense.

    Most likely, Jesus was an attractive combination of the two extremes, which is a nice reminder of our recent common origin.

  39. diversity hire

    What color is the easter bunny? Thats the real question

  40. Dox

    Yeah… totally don’t give a shit.
    Always liked the idea of Christmas. To be a better person. For one short month of the year, to be able to put aside prejudice, angers, old grudges… and just kind of love everyone in a generalized sort of way.

    Yeah… its a cool idea.

    Entirely too bad humans fuck it up. Every year. Usually with the same sad, sorry ass bullshit.

    /sigh
    My species is so dumb.

  41. I don’t give a shit what anybody wants to do with Santa Claus – as long as I can keep my annual Kwanzaa celebration that I’ve bastardized horrificly for my own amusement. Kwanzaa Karl sneaks in after everyone goes to bed Christmas day, we leave him a plate of fried chicken and a grape soda, he steals a present from each kid, leaves a pawn ticket for the kids to go and get their stuff out of hock the next day. A good time is had by all.

  42. Shit, even Buddy Christ has a little pigment in his complexion

  43. Mama Pinkus

    She’s a Fox News propagandist – she’s just doing her job being racist and ignorant.

  44. Slappy Magoo

    Stupid goes in, stupid goes out. You can’t explain it.

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