Megan Fox Apologizes To Lindsay Lohan For Making Completely Accurate Statement

January 16th, 2013 // 27 Comments
Jesus Christ!
Megan Fox Esquire
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During the Esquire interview where she was repeatedly described as a snow driven field unmarred by the hoofprints of ugly deer-humans or some equally ridiculous bullshit, Megan Fox somehow said something that wasn’t about the Internet heralding in the apocalypse which she knows because she speaks Heaven-language. (Seriously, have you read this thing? You should probably read this thing.) In fact, what she said was a completely accurate comparison of Lindsay Lohan and Marilyn Monroe:

“I started reading about her and realized that her life was incredibly difficult. It’s like when you visualize something for your future. I didn’t want to visualize something so negative.”
But she was a great actress, a great icon, a figure of power.
“She wasn’t powerful at the time. She was sort of like Lindsay. She was an actress who wasn’t reliable, who almost wasn’t insurable…. She had all the potential in the world, and it was squandered,” she says, curled defensively on the sofa. “I’m not interested in following in those footsteps.”

Unreliable actress who was once full of potential but now no one will insure with a ten-foot pole. Toss in international hooking and that’s exactly Lindsay Lohan. Except Megan Fox is apologizing for the remark because she’s a deep philosopher now, you guys. Totes deep. Via Facebook:

In the newly released article that I did for Esquire, there is a reference that is made to Lindsay Lohan that I would like to clarify before it snowballs into something silly.
The journalist and I were discussing why I was removing my Marilyn Monroe tattoo, especially since in his opinion, Marilyn was such a powerful and iconic figure for women.
I attempted to draw parallels between Lindsay and Marilyn in order to illustrate my point that while Marilyn may be an icon now, sadly she was not respected and taken seriously while she was still living.
Both women were gifted actresses, whose natural talent was lost amongst the chaos and incessant media scrutiny surrounding their lifestyles and their difficulties adhering to studio schedules etc.
I intended for this to be a factual comparison of two women with similar experiences in Hollywood. Unfortunately it turned into me offering up what is really much more of an uneducated opinion.
It was most definitely not my intention to criticize or degrade Lindsay.
I would never want her to feel bullied, as she does not deserve that.
I was not always speaking eloquently during this interview and this miscommunication is my fault.

I won’t even get into the fact that Megan Fox, while absolutely fucking crazy, still has a chance at a decent career ahead of her so she shouldn’t be afraid of Lindsay Lohan who’s lucky if she still has three months left of letting Asian dignitaries eat sushi off her naked body. Let’s just jump to how this story ends: Megan invites Lindsay over for a deep spiritual discussion only to have the necklace her grandmother left her stolen and her infant son run over by a car. See? The Bible’s not the only one who can predict the future. Suck it, Revelations.

Photo: Esquire


  1. cc

    If things really skip a generation, her child should be a genius.

  2. JC

    I’ve always wondered what the big deal with Marilyn Monroe and why she still holds so much fascination for people. In that sense, her and Lindsay are very similar. If the latest version of John Elton 50 years from now writes a song about Lindsay, I’ll be completely mystified. At least Marilyn banged JFK.

    • cc

      Glad someone else feels that way. Yes, she was attractive, but her life and path to fame is a mash up of Jenny McCarthy and Lindsay Lohan… a not too bright woman leveraging her looks and giving head to find fame and then screwing up. The best that can be said is that she put in a couple of decent performances.

  3. karlito

    she likes girls, Lindsay likes girls. i think an video taped apology is the best resolution. they can kiss, lick and makeup.

  4. Fish I went to her facebook and 164490 actually liked her comment. She could talk in tongues to Xenu and ppl would love her. Being beautiful and tiits seems more important to US ppl than common sense intelligence.

  5. zomgbie

    welcome to
    megan fox’s deep thought for the day…

    • Moo Cow Hunter

      Megan looks in the abyss, the abyss stares back at her. At that moment the abyss says: Holy Shit! Keep her out of here!

  6. Deacon Jones

    She reminds me of my psycho ex girlfriend Filipino stripper…I know what her husband is going through…

    “Baby…..let’s build a greenhouse in my living room. I want it to FEEL like the Philippines…we can get animals and bugs and everything. We can make it a jungle!”

    (picks up remote, flips from Discovery to Science channel)

    “Ok, hun. Whatever you want.”

  7. Distracted Banana

    Fox is as shallow as the kiddie pool at Water World but at least she could have read up on the person she fuckin’ inks into her body.

  8. Cock Dr

    Models shouldn’t talk…they should stick to modelling.
    Now sell us some more eye shadow, shoes and bras Ms Fox.
    Wash my car.

  9. Marilyn Monroe? Don’t make me laugh. Monroe had talent, intelligence, and parents who were MIA – she wasn’t a child star with marginal talent and disastrous parental influence who couldn’t make it as an adult actor. Billy Wilder wouldn’t waste an inch of film capturing one of Lohan’s horribly flat and vacant performances, and the fact that she keeps re-quoting and clingling to Monroe’s photo poses in a desperate bid for cinematic relevance is pathetic . Only people without two gray cells to rub together *cough* Megan Fox *cough* are dumb enough to take that subtle-as-a-sledgehammer prompt nd run with it as a basis to compare the two.

    If you want an apt comparison, think Dana Plato.

    • I was about to say, if anyone deserves an apology from Megan Fox, it’s the memory of Marilyn Monroe for lumping her together with Lindsay Lohan.

      • Seriously, TomFrank, can you imagine Lohan holding a single person as spellbound as Monroe did with most of the Western world in the 50′s and 60′s? Monroe fucking owned any camera that was turned her way, which flat-affect Lohan never did, even as a kid. And even though Monroe was a bloody nightmare on the set when she finally showed up, esecially with Paula Strassberg in tow and insisting on calling the shots, when the film finally went in the can everyone had to admit it was well worth it. The only Marilyn-like thing Lohan does is turn up late – or not at all – and she doesn’t have anywhere near the chops to make everyone feel her finally showing up was worth it in the end.

        All she does is persist in writing checks her “talent” can’t hope to cash, which is why she got kicked to the curb as soon as people who were deluded enough to hire her could get their heavy boots on. After they realized she stole them and made her return them, that is.

  10. Archie Leach

    The problem is megan fox simply doesn’t have the intellectual capacity to engage in something as simple AND complicated as social and psychological analysis and every time she opens her mouth about pretty much everything all it does is confirm the well-established view that her role in this world is nothing more but tits&ass.

  11. Lindsay Lohan Nicotine Lungs

    Megan needs to apologize for being such a bad actor.

  12. The entire time I was reading the quotes from Megan Fox I was thinking of those dolls where the little girls pull the string and it says things like “I…love…you!” The difference is that in Meg’s case, the string is about 16 feet long.

  13. When you are hot, people are less likely to call you out on your stupid and weird bullshit.

  14. To sum up what Megan was saying: Marilyn was a whore, Lindsay is a whore, but I will back pedal if anyone is offended.

  15. All I heard was “I need to drum up as much publicity as I can for this photo shoot, so I’ll keep talking about it to anyone who’ll listen”

    • Smile Now/Cry Later

      LOL… That’s all I got out of it too. She’s always been desperate for that attention but it seems to me, it’s getting worse. I mean, really. How desperate must one be to go a’running to the press to tell them of your shock/dismay of how no one in the media cared that you just gave birth (you just know she made ole Bri do that, lol)?? I laughed my ass off when I read that nonsense. If that doesn’t scream of desperation for publicity, I don’t know what does….

  16. Koko the educated Monkey

    Who on earth writes this garbage?
    Ooops, Shame on me for reading it. ):

  17. Megan Fox Esquire
    Commented on this photo:

    brian austin green has really downgraded-from beautiful vanessa marcil to this big nose, big forehead, loud, stupid bitch. what the hell.

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