In one of the most ridiculous accounts I’ve ever read, Lindsay Lohan’s ex-bodyguard, Lee Weaver, reveals he quit being Lohan’s bodyguard because she was too out of control. He tells the News of the World that Lohan:
ATTACKED a gun-wielding cocaine dealer for ripping her off. SNORTED line after line with Simple Life star Nicole Richie in a TEN-HOUR binge. SLASHED her wrists with knives, sobbing that she “didn’t belong on this planet”. ENJOYED frenzied lesbian romps with scores of girls she picked up at parties — and even made a play for chart star Mariah Carey.
I don’t doubt that Lindsay Lohan is out of control, but this is insane. And by insane I mean 100% totally true. Although he left out the time she got into a fist fight with a homeless person and then ate his brains raw.
colby | June 11, 2007 at 2:15 pm
totally true
Lucija | June 11, 2007 at 2:15 pm
first :) :)
SGT Dan | June 11, 2007 at 2:15 pm
I call BS on some of it. There would have been lesbo pics (besides the light bladeplay with Vanessa M-whatever) if that had happened.
none | June 11, 2007 at 2:16 pm
omg, her mom is a long island guido.
Stoned Bored | June 11, 2007 at 2:16 pm
4th!
Ha ha Lucija, not first!
I would so stick it between those tits.
JungleRed | June 11, 2007 at 2:17 pm
Throw ‘em all in jail!
Man, that mother of her’s is one scary tranny-looking bitch.
JungleRed | June 11, 2007 at 2:17 pm
oops…hers
Bern | June 11, 2007 at 2:19 pm
I have never wanted to party with someone more.
gina | June 11, 2007 at 2:19 pm
“Frenzied lesbian romps with scores of girls”
I must meet this girl!!
http://www.innerdrama.com/
penni | June 11, 2007 at 2:19 pm
wtf is up with that picture? i think her mom thinks she’s as badass as her daughter, which is saddening.
Boba Fett | June 11, 2007 at 2:22 pm
There’s got to be some sex tapes out there somewhere……..and I’d like to see them.
Brock Landers | June 11, 2007 at 2:24 pm
I’d say she makes about anyone look like Jesus.
Gull E. Bull | June 11, 2007 at 2:25 pm
I believe every word. News of the World is the second most reliable publication (The Onion is #1).
adeliza | June 11, 2007 at 2:25 pm
No, seriously, is that a real woman with her in that pic? Is that a transvestite?
NicotineEyePatch | June 11, 2007 at 2:26 pm
It’s like looking into the future, you can tell Lindsay will look just as rough as her in 3-4 years.
NicotineEyePatch | June 11, 2007 at 2:28 pm
I mean Dina, not Pete Doherty. Or Jesus.
Ruby | June 11, 2007 at 2:30 pm
I bet Hohan is happy she looks more like her father….or, is that her father pictured??
Bruce Dickinson | June 11, 2007 at 2:31 pm
This is not more cowbell.
Angry Ferret Jones | June 11, 2007 at 2:33 pm
It’s hard to hate HoHan when her tits look so fucking nice.
Goddamn this penis of mine!!!!
MF | June 11, 2007 at 2:34 pm
It’s obviously a planned charme offensive from the Lohan PR-camp. Just getting some sympathetic slizes of life in the news after all the horrible stories that were printed about her.
And it works! She’s totally rewon my sympathy(or maybe thats just because of the great side-boobage in that picture)
Yourfairytale | June 11, 2007 at 2:35 pm
Well I certainly agree with her that she doesn’t belong on this planet.
I love it when people who have no reason to be depressed are suicidal. What wimps.
...here he is Our Lord and Savior! | June 11, 2007 at 2:37 pm
I admire Lindsay for surviving (barely, so far) the thing on the left side of the picture and the thing that it was married to (prison Jesus).
No, seriously.
The_Squizz | June 11, 2007 at 2:38 pm
This bitch just went up on my MUST DO list. After I’m done with her and her dike friends, they can all kill themselves.
Superevil | June 11, 2007 at 2:39 pm
Sounds like a normal saturday night for me.
Goink | June 11, 2007 at 2:39 pm
Cool – bodyguards can speak in all caps!
kristin | June 11, 2007 at 2:40 pm
not surprising. you could tell me lindsay lohan had a drunk threesome with her mom and britney spears and i’d be about as surprised as if you said paris hilton has an IQ of 12.
Parrish | June 11, 2007 at 2:40 pm
Wow. I hated Lindsay before this post. I mean, I knew she was a cunt. But her weekends sound awesome! LINDSAY. BE MY FRIEND.
nici | June 11, 2007 at 2:45 pm
They would be fun people to party with…getting away with crazy wild things with out going to jail!!like..crashing cars……Drinking and driving…squirting heroin at camera men..lezbo romps….feeding pot to monkeys…i mean come on, thats a party!!!;)
drooling american | June 11, 2007 at 2:47 pm
uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh that’s just fuckin fascinating.
So what’s the latest on Paris?
mazstir | June 11, 2007 at 2:50 pm
pete doherty IS jesus.
getoutofmygalley | June 11, 2007 at 2:50 pm
I wanna hear more about Jesus. That headline is misleading
hotyute | June 11, 2007 at 2:52 pm
i was waiting to hear about the Santa Klauss also.
chango | June 11, 2007 at 2:53 pm
“ENJOYED frenzied lesbian romps with scores of girls she picked up at parties”
Damn, No way I give up that gig . . . NFW
Fifi trooper | June 11, 2007 at 2:54 pm
I T.H.I.N.K. THAT ALL OF YOU IS OUT OF CONTROL! I SWEAR THAT IT’S A MILLION MORE PEOPLE OUT THERE, THAT DOES DRUGS, IS SHE ANY DIFFERENT? IF, SHE WANTS TO HAVE A HUGE HOLE IN HER NOSE, THAT’S HER NOSE! I DON’T GET WHY? DO YOU POST PICTURES OF HER MOTHER ON THE INTERNET? THAT’S HER MOM, AND I THINK THAT SHE SHOULD GET A LITTLE RESPECT, JUST FOR HAVING HER, AND HAVING THE SMARTS TO GET HER INTO THE BUSINESS! WHO GIVES, YOU THE RIGHT TO JUDGE ANYBODY, ON HOW THEIR RAISING THEIR KID! lINDSAY, IS A GROWN GIRL! IT’S UNFORTUNATE, THAT MAYBE THAT SHE DIDN’T HAVE A DAD IN HER LIFE, TO GUIDE, HER WHEN HER MOTHER MIGHT HAVE BEEN SLIPPING ON THE DISCIPLINE! THAT’S SAD, BUT I THINK THAT SHE WILL COME AROUND! SO….IN OTHER WORDS, FUCK OFF…BITCHES, AND GO TAKE A DOUSHE!
Jimbo | June 11, 2007 at 2:57 pm
@9 can I come with you?
getoutofmygalley | June 11, 2007 at 2:58 pm
One *uses* a doushe. One does not *take* a doushe; and it’s spelled *douCHe*, smarty.
K? k.
hotyute | June 11, 2007 at 3:00 pm
@34 “WHO GIVES, YOU THE RIGHT TO JUDGE ANYBODY” The comma after gives, hmmm, another coke suspect.
MF | June 11, 2007 at 3:00 pm
What are you talking about? These are the most positive comments on LiLo I have ever read here
PunjabPete | June 11, 2007 at 3:03 pm
#34 – you are a douche…
CHA | June 11, 2007 at 3:03 pm
@34 i think you’re confused and a bit lost. try http://www.lindsayfans.com, retard.
HoboChic | June 11, 2007 at 3:04 pm
Jeez, Fifi. You don’t have to yell.
getoutofmygalley | June 11, 2007 at 3:06 pm
@39
You rawk.
omgreentoast | June 11, 2007 at 3:09 pm
#34- I love lindsay just as much as the next person, don’t get me wrong, but when you’re gonna tell of a ton of people for somthing that you should probably just keep to yourself, i suggest not writing it like a fucking retard hopped up on crack.
Jimbo | June 11, 2007 at 3:10 pm
@34 You are as fucking stupid as your name. Why don’t you go to the Lindsay Lohan fan site and chat with all your buddies you stupid fucking douche bag
foundation | June 11, 2007 at 3:12 pm
Those two combined are dumber than one Paris.
lindsay | June 11, 2007 at 3:15 pm
Is that A fucking man next to her damn that shim is ugly, coke whores
NicotineEyePatch | June 11, 2007 at 3:16 pm
At least we know the eyebrows were inherited, so it isn’t entirely Lindsay’s fault, or her esthetician’s.
Donkey | June 11, 2007 at 3:18 pm
I wish her 15 minutes would dry up and blow away.
Texas Tranny | June 11, 2007 at 3:22 pm
Isn’t fifi a dog’s name? Here fifi, I’ve got a bone for you, here puppy, puppy.
anka | June 11, 2007 at 3:23 pm
I really don’t want to belive his story but the pictures of lindsay with her wrist cut are real and its obvious that she cuts herself so it makes u wonder what else is true about what he’s saying since the cutting part is all true