Lindsay Lohan flashes her bulge

October 13th, 2006 // 162 Comments
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I’m not sure why Lindsay Lohan is going out in public dressed in burlesque outfits. I’m even less sure why her panties have a huge lump in them. I’ve seen her vagina before so I know it’s there, but what other magical wonders might she be hiding down there? Precious gems? Testicles? Her own feces? These are the questions we as a society should be trying to answer.

superficial

  1. Bioplant

    She looks good in black. Or with black in her.

  2. Thanks superficial. How do I clean this puke off of my monitor?

    http://www.celebslam.com

  3. TheHoffinator

    It’s a load in her pants. She needs a diaper.

  4. BigJim

    That’s just a week’s worth of spooge leaking out all at once.

  5. siliconsaint69

    some poor small animal must have mistaken crotch for a treehole, crawled in, and died.

  6. girlybat

    One of her ben wa balls slipped out of her enormous vag. Nice. :shudder:

  7. ponk

    i think we just found paris hilton’s kinkajou.

  8. Speedy Ed

    I think what you are seeing is some kind of crotch panel in the panty hose, that is a slightly different color than the main part of the hose, or reflects light differently. I think what looks like a shadow behind some dangly bit is actually a seam.

  9. lookma_nohans

    It’s her stash! Next stop, her nose.

  10. RichPort

    I knew the bitch was evil. Her refection makes it look like she’s already in the fucking truck, waiting for herself to get in. Confused? Me too. And on Frifuckingday the thirteenth… Edna, please exorcise this ball having bimbo!

  11. honeybises

    Speedy Ed is right. They’re called pantyhose because they have a cotton panel so you don’t have to wear any underwear. Hence, pantyhose.

  12. Totally the crotch guard…though she’s so nast it did make me wonder there for a sec!

  13. mrs.t

    I knew she was a pre-op tranny.

  14. its her bag of ganja…she’s learning from Paris’s mistakes everyday…go girl…now if she can just find a place to stash her coke supply…

  15. Justin Igger

    she got bigger black balls then me and i got big black balls

  16. If it is a crotch guard it must be made out of Kevlar and Titanium. I believe that was laid out in a court order at some point.

    The People v. Fire Crotch et.al.

  17. el_princess

    lol @10

    Shame speedy ed’s right…i love watching firecrotch make a fool of herself

  18. strawberrylaundry

    sadly, this is not a pic of the vag for those who know anything about pantyhose, its the piece of fabric that is sewn with the nylon as some kind of guard/protection….from what, who knows!

  19. jrzmommy

    is that the cotton crotch to her pantyhose? Hee hee. What a goober.

  20. PunjabPete

    Alright all you hose experts… Then explain the apparent bulge?

  21. My ass is better than hers. Jealous?

  22. ponk

    jessica, that must be why you display it on your shoulders.

  23. hav-a-tampa

    Her “Tampon” Slipped Out While She was Walking, or Maybe it’s Trying To Escape. or it’s some kind of “Panty Liner”, Slipped, and or Trying To Escape.

  24. Captain Walleye

    I think she farted and the gas is trapped inside the tight panties. The guy (or girl) who went down on her that night must have gotten a nice surprise.

  25. The Gilbs

    #20, ever hear of beef curtains?

  26. tinyTy

    The crotch lining of pantyhose would NOT be bulbous like that. My vagina is an inny, not an outy. Maybe she just has a gigantic clit.

  27. ImmaAssClown

    @20, that isn’t a buldge. They are right, it is the cotton crotch slipped down on one leg. trick of the angle/eye whatever

  28. jrzmommy

    I’m just not seeing a bulge….I see chubby legs but not a bulge. Maybe it’s her maxipad?

  29. BigJim

    That bulge can only be one of two things:

    Jessica or Edna.

  30. Bioplant

    I wonder if she is still a virgin…

  31. mrs.t

    Truly, it IS just the cotton crotch-thing plus a weird shadow, but can’t we all pretend we don’t know that and assume testes? Although I would think anyone with money and a stylist could come up with a better hosiery situation than this. Poor form, as usual, Lindsay.

  32. beifiori

    I have NEVER seen pantyhose bag like that when the rest fit perfectly…are you sure that’s not the work of some photoshopper??? Besides that, why is she wearing a shirt as a damn dress? jeez, she needs to get a clue, we don’t want to see her oversized, overused cooch! ick!

  33. dstroyer

    Holy shee-at! Turn your head and cough!

  34. The Gilbs

    33, FUCKING HILARIOUS!!! I love it when you bastards make me laugh out loud.

  35. LL

    It’s my fault, I did ask for more Lohan yesterday. Yikes. WTF is wrong with her? I mean, I guess seeing an unattractive cotton crotch on hose is better than seeing just the crotch itself in all its bald splendor, but has she perhaps considered wearing either pants or a longer skirt? It’s like she WANTS us to see it. Either that or she’s trying to out-Paris Paris. It’s probably both. Why doesn’t she just do the Playboy or Hustler spread and get it over with? Followed by a brief, disastrous marriage and death by OD. She did want to emulate Marilyn Monroe, maybe this is what she meant. She’s ahead of schedule, though. Marilyn kicked it at age 36. Lindsay had better pace herself or she’ll be dead before she hits 25.

  36. cate

    Unfortunately, I’m going to have to say its the lining in the pantyhose.

    Now, I’m like, the last person to EVER want to defend lindsay, but that’s definitely the built-it crotch fabric…. not a bulge. But I really wish it was, because that would make me smile. :)

  37. yuckyfresh

    good ol’ firecrotch, still working her magic!

  38. Madrid Marriott

    The real issue here is — why must we be subjected to this? Why the fuck can’t Hohan keep her nasty junk covered up? I walk down the street a lot. A see many women get in and out of cars. Often, they have fairly short skirts. Never do I see their fuzzy fish tacos.

  39. GirlyGirl

    Hoarf. Where are her pants? I hate it when I forget my pants!

  40. hamacus

    Forget that ball bulge. Is that a purse or a Gimp Mask she is carrying. Shudder the thought!

  41. PunjabPete

    #25 – Sure! They sell those on the same ausle as Piss Flaps if I am not mistaken!!

  42. PunjabPete

    #25 – Sure! They sell those on the same aisle as Piss Flaps if I am not mistaken!!

  43. commissioner

    Placemats as skirts have been in style for weeks. She probably should have pinned two of them together though, since one didn’t quite do it.

  44. The Gilbs

    Is Edna the same horrific woman this website is mocking?

    http://www.ednabambrick.com/

  45. BigJim

    #44: yes.

    And I think LL may be suffering from what I believe is called cervical prolapse. It’s when your snatch turns inside out. Usually from birthin’ too many babies, but I guess being a whore can cause it too.

  46. combustion8

    looks like a nut sack to me… I should know, I have one.

  47. IzzyInATizzy

    #8, 18, etc.– Clearly an unflattering angle of her pantyhose crotch.

    But the more relevant question is, who wears cotton-crotched translucent pantyhose as pants?? Ironic that LaLo’s attempt to advertise her wide-open vaginal whoredom actually just looked like a huge swinging scrotum.

    ::shudder::

  48. The Gilbs

    42, Piss Flaps is a new one for me. Thank you for the education.

  49. vainandlovingit

    oh how cute, i thought the little lindsay penis was usually strapped to her leg. hi there little guy, feeling a little cold today?

  50. That’d be funny if all those photoshopped snatch shots weren’t for salacious purposes, but to cover a pair of saggy balls. It’s either balls or she’s got meat hanging like an Italian deli. Seriously, that’s why her boyfriends always crave Arbys or Quiznos after going down on her. Her puss looks like two pounds of pastrami rammed into a five inch pita.

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