Lindsay Lohan’s Twittering Again

With it becoming more and more evident that she’s going to duck grand theft felony charges – The jewelry store wants the whole thing to go away now. – Lindsay Lohan’s people have let her use Twitter again where she either wants us to know she’d never steal or is in the movie Greenberg. It could go either way:

Was on the phone with my sister&this movie Greenberg is on, i heard my voice which was odd- and ryhs ifans is watching Just My Luck in the movie- made me laugh.. i just want to be on set again, and left alone to just work! fyi- i would never steal, in case people are wondering. I was not raised to lie, cheat, or steal… also, what i wear to court shouldnt be front page news. it’s just absurd. god bless xox L

No, wait, I get the point of this message now: “I’m front page news! WHEEE!” As for, “I wasn’t raised to lie, cheat or steal,” your father is a vagina-kicking grifter who would sell a story about you forgetting to wipe if it kept him lush in cellphone clips, and your mother couldn’t be trusted with a Carvel ice cream card. I almost want to say these people didn’t teach you anything but to lie, cheat and steal, except that would leave out raging alcoholism and sucking dick for coke which is, really, the 18th birthday every girl should have in a Disney World conference room as their mother shouts out pointers on top of Goofy. I’m amazed they don’t offer that package.

Photos: Pacific Coast News