Coroner: Lindsay Lohan Never Touched Whitney Houston’s Body Bag
In a new interview with The Telegraph, Lindsay Lohan claimed she handled Whitney Houston’s body bag during her court-ordered community service at the LA County morgue. Which obviously never happened because Lindsay Lohan said it did, but just for fun, here’s the coroner’s office pointing out how completely full of shit she is:
An official from the Coroner’s Office tells TMZ … Whitney was NEVER in a body bag and no one in the probation program came in contact with Whitney’s body.
Lindsay — who was ordered by a judge to spend time at the morgue to teach her a lesson about drinking and driving — claimed in an interview she was singled out to roll Whitney’s body bag.
In Lindsay Lohan’s defense, she is a cyborg hooker from the future now, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned from cyborg hookers from the future it’s that our definition of reality no longer pertains to them. Also, they can see through any object, so there’s no point in hiding your wallet. Don’t even bother.