Lindsay Lohan Gets a Standing Ovation, Says She’s ‘In The Clear’

April 26th, 2011 // 39 Comments

Seen here outside NBC Studios yesterday, Lindsay Lohan taped an appearance for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno set to air tonight, and apparently the audience gave her a standing ovation only to be rewarded with her lying straight to their faces. Via RadarOnline:

Leno asked Lohan, “At what point did you realize, ‘Oh my God, I could lose this, this could slip away from me?’”
“I think that when, you know, being young and being in the position I was in, you don’t really take the time to appreciate what you have and it’s all kind of a whirlwind, and people make decisions for you,” Lohan said. “But I’m not a kid anymore — I’m 24, I’ve made a lot of mistakes and I recognize that. I’m in the clear now, and as long as I stay focused, I can achieve what I want to achieve.

Keep in mind this is the same person who just got out on bail Friday night and is still facing misdemeanor charges for retail theft, but I guess that’s “in the clear” for her. At any rate, the more interesting part is now I finally know who still watches The Tonight Show after the Conan debacle: People who give standing ovations to Lindsay Lohan. Because God knows she’s achieved so much. “Oh my, Henry, look, she seems relatively sober. *clap clap clap* How brave to tell her story that changes each time we hear it. *clap clap clap* And, wait, what’s this? She didn’t bring her mother? *rises to feet, crowd goes wild*

Photos: Fame, INFdaily

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  1. KG

    The thing they left out of this piece is the reason she got a standing ovation. She basically did an Oprah. She stood up and announced “everyone in the audience is getting a blow job! I’ve got a blow job for you! And for you! And for you! Every one of you is getting a blow job!”

  2. Bucky Barnes

    If she could just get paid for court appearances she’d still have a career.

  3. kendrachanae

    What a fucking loser

  4. Rancid

    They were all standing and yelling because a bunch of critters jumped out of her cooch and were running around under the seats.

  5. RoboZombie

    The Lohans: Setting a new low for White Trash.

  6. TomFrank

    I learned the truth at twenty-four
    That fame can go to any whore
    Or ginger girls with nice-sized tits
    With mothers who will pitch a fit
    The innocence I never knew
    Was replaced by a drunken youth
    Use my first name and I will sue
    At twenty-four I learned the truth…

  7. TrulySexy

    “In The Clear”, words she won’t be hearing at her next AIDS test.

  8. “…And people make decisions for you” I guess these ‘people’ also decided Lindsay would become a drug-addled, drunk driving, kleptomaniac lunatic…..nope, I don’t sense any lingering denial there, what a moron.

  9. Marceelf

    I seriously didn’t know the Tonight Show was still on. Why the fuck would they want her? What is she promoting? STD’s?

  10. She’s in the clear…drinking nothing but straight vodka now.

  11. Nate

    Oh sure everyone get’s all Brave online hidden behind anonymity, but when actually faced with their object of hate, or desire they crumble. People are pathetic. And I mean that in a good way.

  12. Lindsay Lohan. Winning!

  13. Lindsay Lohan Tonight Show
    The Critical Crassness
    Commented on this photo:

    This whole story should have been relegated to “The Crap We Missed”, then actually missed! If there isn’t ample areas of naked skin in a “Lohan” post, it isn’t worthy of its’ own post and 8 pictures. Waste of bandwidth!

  14. The Critical Crassness

    I think you all are misjudging Lindsay. She isn’t drinking and doing drugs any longer……she doesn’t need to because her brain is already saturated to the point of never needing to do either to remain high!

  15. Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt, douchebag.

  16. Lisa meant rough love

    People’s behavior fascinates me. This girl cant catch a break, can’t get a job, she’s bashed on the inner-webs on a daily basis but somehow she found an audience that gives her a standing ovation. How come?

    • JC

      The same reason people so often appear here to illiterately screech about forgiving Chris Brown: Most people are very, very stupid.

    • Ed

      These are the same kind of mouthbreathers that think Ted Kennedy was a hero instead of a murderer, Invading Iraq was the right thing to do, and Chris Brown deserves a break.

    • akewlazzmom

      Because someone from the crew hit the switch to the big sign that said, ” STAND AND CLAP”.
      Trust me, it wasn’t because people loved her or anything!

  17. JC

    She said, “I can achieve what I want to achieve.” Mock if you will, but if she wants to achieve a long, swirling trip down the drain, she is seeing a level of success that most of us only dream of.

  18. “the audience gave her a standing ovation”

    Americans are stupid.

  19. VandaL

    Fuckin’ idiot TV crowds need locking up with her. TWATS!

  20. Nice shirt. Now she’s trying weasel her way into a roll with Ringling Brothers. She can be the chick in the side show with the cavernous vagina, right next to the bearded lady, who she’ll probably try to date.

  21. LJ

    There was a standing ovation for Lindsay Lohan because the sign facing the audience said “Stand Up” and “Applaud”.

    Now to my understanding she’s out on bail on “Work Release”, so we can only hope that her mother tells her to ignore the Judge’s order to start her 480 hours of Community Service, so that when dear Lindsay shows up in court on May 11 the Judge will revoke bail and send her directly to jail to wait out the June 3rd trial date.

  22. Clarence Beeks

    I fucking can’t believe how delusional she is.

    I also can’t believe how stupid the American public are. I am American, but I am ashamed at how fucking stupid most people in my country are. If this were not true, there would be no more Reality TV.
    Yet it thrives, year after year.

  23. kristopher.w

    so where is the standing ovation ? sorry, i missed that if it was supposed to be included in the video…

  24. RasputinsLiver

    What a lying dumbass cunt.

    Too be she tainted an otherwise fun film, Machete. I was gonna buy the dvd until I rented it and watched it and saw her in it. I won’t buy anything with her in it. Nor watch it if I can help it.

    Sorry, Danny Trejo. Love you, man. Can’t stand the bleached blonde, duck lipped twat named Lindsay (no fucking tradmark!) Lohan.

  25. anonym

    “i’ve made a lot of mistakes……..”

    “and I’m in the clear now to continue to make a fuckload of mistakes for the rest of my life….”

  26. Brooke

    So a month ago she was still a kid and shoplifting necklaces, but NOW she’s all grown up? Okay, awesome, I’m glad she cleared that up for me. *applauds*

  27. Ashley

    Have you ever been to one of these show’s as an audience member, they get everyone from the local nursing home, and tell them when to laugh, boo, sit, stand, poop……

  28. Dick Douche, Private Eye

    Haven’t any of you people even CONSIDERED the possibility that she’s quite literally too sexy for that jailhouse??

    …?…

  29. Jigs

    You know what’s fucking sad? Searching back through the archives, I realised that the last positive post about Lindsay was in 2005, when she was 17 and Jay Leno was staring at her awesome, underage breasts. The next post was from some chick who found 18-year-old Lindsay’s coke-filled wallet in the gutter in NYC. She has literally been like this as long as she was legally allowed to tie her own shoes.

  30. Chaz Bono

    Just before going on the show she snorted 8 lines of yay in a row all to herself

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