Lindsay Lohan’s Miscarriage Excuse Worked, It Actually Worked

If Lindsay Lohan were you or I, she would’ve lied about having a miscarriage in court documents and subsequently found herself guilty of perjury. Instead, she was handed $150,000 and sent packing to Cannes because God is dead. TMZ reports:

According to new legal docs, Lindsay’s clothing label 6126 struck the settlement agreement this week with D.N.A.M. Apparel Industries, the company she sued last year for $1.1 million.
Lindsay claimed D.N.A.M. failed to pay her hundreds of thousands of dollars for licensing her 6126 trademark for international clothing sales. D.N.A.M. sued Lindsay right back, insisting her druggie reputation made it impossible to unload the merch.
We’re told the settlement kills BOTH lawsuits — and D.N.A.M.’s demand to force Lindsay to testify about the miscarriage.

I don’t want to say celebrity justice in California is fucked beyond repair, but I’m pretty sure if you proved Lindsay Lohan single-handedly orchestrated 9/11, the judge would just smile and laugh then hand her a newborn baby to run over. “We didn’t even tie the umbilical cord. Just the way you like it!”

Photo: Getty, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, Joe/WENN