It’s The Trailer For ‘The Canyons’ Starring Lindsay Lohan As Pretty Much Lindsay Lohan

By: The Superficial / October 9, 2012

Here’s the first teaser trailer for The Canyons starring Lindsay Lohan and porn star James Deen that was literally shot in four weeks for about $5 because she’s in the middle of a comeback, you guys. Anyway, if the faux-60s vibe doesn’t make you immediately stop this thing (and rightfully so), notice how unlike the trailer for Liz & Dick, you never hear Lindsay Lohan say a single word because her voice only has one tone now and it’s “Middle-Aged Truck Stop Waitress With Emphysema Who Lost The Ability To Emote On The Tip Of A Drug Dealer’s Penis A Long, Long Time Ago, Sweetie- A Hack Hack! ‘Scuse Me. Coffee?”