“Surnames? Where we’re going, we don’t need surnames…”
After her father was arrested for domestic abuse again this week, Lindsay Lohan is officially changing her name to just “Lindsay,” and Dina Lohan is reverting back to her maiden name, so rejoice, for the gin-beast shall falleth off the face of the earth into the yonder abyss of Obscurity. Popeater reports:
“Lindsay is dropping the Lohan and just going by Lindsay,” Dina tells me, exclusively. “Plus, me and [younger daughter] Ali will be officially changing our last names back to my maiden name, Sullivan.”
Lindsay had been thinking about dropping her surname for some time but at first thought no one would know who she was. It was only after the infamous Super Bowl E-trade advertisement referring to a baby as “that milkaholic Lindsay,” that the actress knew she no longer needed it.
“So many of the greatest people in showbiz are known by just their first name. Look at Oprah and Beyonce. Now you can add Lindsay to that list,” a family friend tells me. “And it’s a way for them all to start over. No one in the family wants anything to do with Lindsay’s father [Michael Lohan] anymore and that includes sharing a last name.”
Right. Because it’s the Lohan last name that was holding her back. That’s been the albatross here. Not the rampant drug addiction, diva behavior and rampant kleptomania. Had she done this sooner instead of going to stupid rehab, she could’ve moved on to robbing banks and skiing with Charlie Sheen down a literal mountain of cocaine by now. I heard he hands out Bentleys for two minutes of sex. No foolin’.
Photos: Splash News
She look like Macauly Culkin in this pic.
Macauly Culkin wearing a duckbill.
Oh my god. I clicked on the comment page to say the same exact thing. It’s insane
haha, me 2! it’s insanely alike
THAT WAS MY FIRST THOUGHT. AHHH.
my first thought was that i’d like to lick on her cute lil butthole…
Man, that was definitely my immediate first thought too.
DUDES. That’s what I thought.
YEP…MACAULY ALL THE WAY
totally came to say the exact same thing. this many people can’t be wrong!
crazy! me too, she does look just like him. How did that happen
NO SHIT I WAS THINKING THIS TOO!
I was going to make the same comment, wondering if it’s just me who thinks that. So glad this was the FIST comment here.
Or you could just get married, knucklehead
that would be fun to watch.
No gay marriage yet in CA.
Lindsey Ronson?
Se should marry Chris Brown.
Then look at his phone.
OMFL lindsay i love your legs. how do i come between them
She should just change her last name to Buckingham, she’ll get a lot more work.
:)
Well played. I was gonna post… “Won’t Mr. Buckingham be pissed”
actually i thought of that weeks ago. believe it or not.
they have the coke habit in common fo sho
She’s not that good a guitar player!
…but she is a virtuoso skinflute player
I don’t blame her, I would do the same.
whats with the macaulay culkin face?
im glad im not the only one that saw the resemblance!
I thought it was Macaulay Culkin in drag.
My thoughts exactly!
Maybe she should just wait a bit so she can start going by “Inmate #328915.”
Score!
Are you sure that’s even Lindsay? It looks like a look-a-like, but not Lindsay.
Macaulay Culkin in drag?
Exactly!
She can change her name all she wants, the impact is still the same though. Coke Whore just becomes Whore.
I would have thought the resounding lack of work she’s been getting might have told her she’s not the big star she thinks she is.
What the heck is that she is wearing around her neck? It looks like a key to open a can of sardines. Wow, what a fashion statement….WINNING! And, in todays news, Lindsay Sheen was involved in a murder, suicide…Nice.
Ha! It really does look like one of those keys! lol
The sardine key was a gift from Sam – it provides a reminder with a simple sniff
I will never look at sardines the same again…thanks.
I see the quitting smoking is going well
Something’s got her legs thicker the last couple months and i fuckin LOVE IT!!!!
that’s the swollen tissue from blood clots dude
she can call herself anything she wants ,she’ll still be a little cumdumpster to
me.
Her first plan was to change her name to Lindsay Milkaholic, but then remembered where she got that idea from, and got mad all over again.
She could change her name to something that would be truly indicative of her, personally, “Lezzie Cokewhore-Kleptomaniac”, and forget the whole Lindsay Lohan bit altogether.
i was thinking she should change her first name to “lips”. lips lohan has a certain ring to it.
The noun form for kleptomania is – wait for it – kleptomania.
Kleptomaniac is a noun as well.
Yes, that’s true when referring to the disorder however, when referring to an individual it is,wait for it….kleptomaniac! You may know nouns but you apparently can’t read a sentence for the context in which the nouns are used.
And furthermore, when the actuary provides the nomenclature to the septuagenarian, my mom pissed in my ass.
octomom went blonde?
The key from a spam can around her neck has finally answered the question “why is she getting so fat”
Totally Macaulay Culkin. Maybe she’s going after Mila Kunis.
You can spray paint a stinky turd orange and say it’s so. It’s still just a stinky turd.
Rarely do you hear such shameless self aggrandized bullshit. Most people, even if they think things like this, at least have the humility to keep it to themselves. “A family friend” says you can add Lindsay to that list.. Yep, sure. I love that Lindsay is so arrogant and self-absorbed that she watches an e-trade commercial that uses her name and she automatically thinks “now I’ve made the big time”. Not the more rational conclusion of “that’s a popular American name having nothing to do with me”..
“Lohan” and “Sullivan”? Great, thanks for perpetuating the Irish stereotypes you family full of douches!!
Quack quack.
I can think of one “Oprah.” I can think of one “Beyonce.” I can think of one “Cher.”
But there are several “Lindsay”s out there. For once in her life I think she may be making a bad move. Bwahahahahaha…
WhothefuckamIlookingathere?
I know right? No way that’s Lindsay.
Lindsay is dropping the Lindsay and just going with Macaulay
“Dina Lohan is reverting back to her maiden name”
Fucking great, unless your name is already Sullivan. DROP DEAD AND GO TO HELL DINA.
WE DON’T WANT YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Was Tits McGee taken?
In other news, Firecrotch is going by just Firecrotch and not Firecrotch Crabs Lohan.
fuck, i was gonna pull a macaulkay here as well!
Lindsay Abdul-Jabbar
Lindsay Lohan aka Cassius Clay
Lindsay Lohanstein
Doesn’t she look just like Macaulay Culkin in the main pic?? Do a side by side comparison .
OOOOOOKKKKKKKK BUT SHE IS STILL A THIEF RIGHT… LINDSEY THE THIEF
is it cold in ny ?
hello hips [very female body shape : ))
love the look, plain and simple…
take no notice of the “feebs?”
they try to live their life by interacting with yours…
sad buggers >?
luv ))
She looks surprisingly like Macaulay Culkin here, am I right or just crazy?
Hey you guys… GUYS!!! Doesn’t she totally look like Macaulay Culkin here??
She looks like Macaulay Culkin
Ew omg, you’re right she does!!!
Macaulay Culkin
She looks like the Olson Twin’s when they stopped being cute and morphed into trolls.
Let me get this straight, the very thing that she thinks makes her recognizable only by her first name, is something she once sued a company for because she didn’t like it? okay then. Glad to see that little squabble actually helped you out Lindsay.
I know there’s no point in telling stupid people why their ideas are bad, but I’m gonna anyways:
What do names like Oprah, Beyonce and Madonna all have in common? They’re weird. They’re uncommon. They lend themselves well to single name monikers. Names like Lindsay, Tara, Kristen, Jennifer, do not. If you were ever so-and-so S., or so-and-so P in school, the single name thing is not going to work out for you.
Great. Now the shorthand,”I gave that chick a ‘Lohan’”, won’t make sense anymore. I’ll have to say “I got drunk, tied her up, took a crap on her chest, did a line of coke with her dad and orchestrated a jewelry heist” the long way.
Is she going for “Lindsay Culkin”?
Do you guys give up? or are you as thirsty as I am… seriously, I need a Tom Collins
DOESN’T SHE LOOK LIKE MACAULEY CULKIN IN TH SPIC? MAYBE LINDSAY CULKIN?
In prison, her name will be again shorted to simply “bitch.”
In prison, her name will be again shorted to simply “bitch.”
just lindsay? THAT’S FUCKING STUPID! people have last names for identification purposes. that vain conceded dip shit should change her last name to lindsay DROOPYCUNT
mila kunis had sex with that?! i think he looks pretty here. oh, thats not macaulay culkin…?
“So many of the greatest people in showbiz are known by just their first name. Look at Oprah and Beyonce. Now you can add Lindsay to that list,” a family friend tells me.
Sounds to me that someone is oblivious to the fact that she’s at best a B-list celebrity. On top of that, Oprah and Beyonce are uncommon names. Since Lindsay isn’t an uncommon name, the move just makes her look pretentious.
Anyway, the real reason is probably that she’s got “daddy issues”, not that I blame her given who her father is.