Lindsay Lohan is Just ‘Lindsay’ Now

March 25th, 2011 // 106 Comments

“Surnames? Where we’re going, we don’t need surnames…”

After her father was arrested for domestic abuse again this week, Lindsay Lohan is officially changing her name to just “Lindsay,” and Dina Lohan is reverting back to her maiden name, so rejoice, for the gin-beast shall falleth off the face of the earth into the yonder abyss of Obscurity. Popeater reports:

“Lindsay is dropping the Lohan and just going by Lindsay,” Dina tells me, exclusively. “Plus, me and [younger daughter] Ali will be officially changing our last names back to my maiden name, Sullivan.”
Lindsay had been thinking about dropping her surname for some time but at first thought no one would know who she was. It was only after the infamous Super Bowl E-trade advertisement referring to a baby as “that milkaholic Lindsay,” that the actress knew she no longer needed it.
“So many of the greatest people in showbiz are known by just their first name. Look at Oprah and Beyonce. Now you can add Lindsay to that list,” a family friend tells me. “And it’s a way for them all to start over. No one in the family wants anything to do with Lindsay’s father [Michael Lohan] anymore and that includes sharing a last name.”

Right. Because it’s the Lohan last name that was holding her back. That’s been the albatross here. Not the rampant drug addiction, diva behavior and rampant kleptomania. Had she done this sooner instead of going to stupid rehab, she could’ve moved on to robbing banks and skiing with Charlie Sheen down a literal mountain of cocaine by now. I heard he hands out Bentleys for two minutes of sex. No foolin’.

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. Larry

    She look like Macauly Culkin in this pic.

  2. Or you could just get married, knucklehead

  3. Lindsay Lohan
    Commented on this photo:

    OMFL lindsay i love your legs. how do i come between them

  4. Jess

    She should just change her last name to Buckingham, she’ll get a lot more work.

  5. giny

    I don’t blame her, I would do the same.

  6. Lindsay Lohan
    FF
    Commented on this photo:

    whats with the macaulay culkin face?

  7. JC

    Maybe she should just wait a bit so she can start going by “Inmate #328915.”

  8. Beatnik

    Are you sure that’s even Lindsay? It looks like a look-a-like, but not Lindsay.

  9. Lindsay Lohan
    stinkfist
    Commented on this photo:

    Macaulay Culkin in drag?

  10. noooooooo

    She can change her name all she wants, the impact is still the same though. Coke Whore just becomes Whore.

  11. I would have thought the resounding lack of work she’s been getting might have told her she’s not the big star she thinks she is.

  12. dpbefun

    What the heck is that she is wearing around her neck? It looks like a key to open a can of sardines. Wow, what a fashion statement….WINNING! And, in todays news, Lindsay Sheen was involved in a murder, suicide…Nice.

  13. Deacon Jones

    I see the quitting smoking is going well

  14. she can call herself anything she wants ,she’ll still be a little cumdumpster to
    me.

  15. The Critical Crassness

    She could change her name to something that would be truly indicative of her, personally, “Lezzie Cokewhore-Kleptomaniac”, and forget the whole Lindsay Lohan bit altogether.

  16. Nouns

    The noun form for kleptomania is – wait for it – kleptomania.

    • Jennyjenjen

      Kleptomaniac is a noun as well.

    • The Critical Crassness

      Yes, that’s true when referring to the disorder however, when referring to an individual it is,wait for it….kleptomaniac! You may know nouns but you apparently can’t read a sentence for the context in which the nouns are used.

      • The Critical Crassness

        And furthermore, when the actuary provides the nomenclature to the septuagenarian, my mom pissed in my ass.

  17. sheesh

    octomom went blonde?

  18. The key from a spam can around her neck has finally answered the question “why is she getting so fat”

  19. Lindsay Lohan
    Samela
    Commented on this photo:

    Totally Macaulay Culkin. Maybe she’s going after Mila Kunis.

  20. You can spray paint a stinky turd orange and say it’s so. It’s still just a stinky turd.

  21. Jennyjenjen

    Rarely do you hear such shameless self aggrandized bullshit. Most people, even if they think things like this, at least have the humility to keep it to themselves. “A family friend” says you can add Lindsay to that list.. Yep, sure. I love that Lindsay is so arrogant and self-absorbed that she watches an e-trade commercial that uses her name and she automatically thinks “now I’ve made the big time”. Not the more rational conclusion of “that’s a popular American name having nothing to do with me”..

  22. RoboZombie

    “Lohan” and “Sullivan”? Great, thanks for perpetuating the Irish stereotypes you family full of douches!!

  23. the only opinion that matters

    Quack quack.

  24. vitobonespur

    I can think of one “Oprah.” I can think of one “Beyonce.” I can think of one “Cher.”

    But there are several “Lindsay”s out there. For once in her life I think she may be making a bad move. Bwahahahahaha…

  25. castallare

    WhothefuckamIlookingathere?

  26. Lindsay Lohan
    fooey
    Commented on this photo:

    Lindsay is dropping the Lindsay and just going with Macaulay

  27. FROM: all the other Sullivans in the world

    “Dina Lohan is reverting back to her maiden name”

    Fucking great, unless your name is already Sullivan. DROP DEAD AND GO TO HELL DINA.

    WE DON’T WANT YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  28. Was Tits McGee taken?

  29. Licensed Gynocologist

    In other news, Firecrotch is going by just Firecrotch and not Firecrotch Crabs Lohan.

  30. Lindsay Lohan
    macmac
    Commented on this photo:

    fuck, i was gonna pull a macaulkay here as well!

  31. she needs a last name

    Lindsay Abdul-Jabbar
    Lindsay Lohan aka Cassius Clay
    Lindsay Lohanstein

  32. Lindsay Lohan
    Your Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Doesn’t she look just like Macaulay Culkin in the main pic?? Do a side by side comparison .

  33. notafan

    OOOOOOKKKKKKKK BUT SHE IS STILL A THIEF RIGHT… LINDSEY THE THIEF

  34. herbiefrog

    is it cold in ny ?

    hello hips [very female body shape : ))

    love the look, plain and simple…

    take no notice of the “feebs?”
    they try to live their life by interacting with yours…

    sad buggers >?

    luv ))

  35. YouWonMeZero

    She looks surprisingly like Macaulay Culkin here, am I right or just crazy?

  36. Lindsay Lohan
    Mandi
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey you guys… GUYS!!! Doesn’t she totally look like Macaulay Culkin here??

  37. Misana

    She looks like Macaulay Culkin

  38. Lindsay Lohan
    Misana
    Commented on this photo:

    Macaulay Culkin

  39. remember when Lindsay was hot

    She looks like the Olson Twin’s when they stopped being cute and morphed into trolls.

  40. Danklin

    Let me get this straight, the very thing that she thinks makes her recognizable only by her first name, is something she once sued a company for because she didn’t like it? okay then. Glad to see that little squabble actually helped you out Lindsay.

  41. Aggie

    I know there’s no point in telling stupid people why their ideas are bad, but I’m gonna anyways:
    What do names like Oprah, Beyonce and Madonna all have in common? They’re weird. They’re uncommon. They lend themselves well to single name monikers. Names like Lindsay, Tara, Kristen, Jennifer, do not. If you were ever so-and-so S., or so-and-so P in school, the single name thing is not going to work out for you.

  42. Great. Now the shorthand,”I gave that chick a ‘Lohan’”, won’t make sense anymore. I’ll have to say “I got drunk, tied her up, took a crap on her chest, did a line of coke with her dad and orchestrated a jewelry heist” the long way.

  43. Mashara

    Is she going for “Lindsay Culkin”?

  44. Lindsay Lohan
    Commented on this photo:

    Do you guys give up? or are you as thirsty as I am… seriously, I need a Tom Collins

  45. Nicky Kiss

    DOESN’T SHE LOOK LIKE MACAULEY CULKIN IN TH SPIC? MAYBE LINDSAY CULKIN?

  46. Lindsay Lohan
    Double D
    Commented on this photo:

    In prison, her name will be again shorted to simply “bitch.”

  47. Lindsay Lohan
    Double D
    Commented on this photo:

    In prison, her name will be again shorted to simply “bitch.”

  48. THEY OUGHTA LOCK HER UP AND THROW AWAY THE KEY!

    just lindsay? THAT’S FUCKING STUPID! people have last names for identification purposes. that vain conceded dip shit should change her last name to lindsay DROOPYCUNT

  49. mila kunis had sex with that?! i think he looks pretty here. oh, thats not macaulay culkin…?

  50. Burt

    “So many of the greatest people in showbiz are known by just their first name. Look at Oprah and Beyonce. Now you can add Lindsay to that list,” a family friend tells me.

    Sounds to me that someone is oblivious to the fact that she’s at best a B-list celebrity. On top of that, Oprah and Beyonce are uncommon names. Since Lindsay isn’t an uncommon name, the move just makes her look pretentious.

    • Burt

      Anyway, the real reason is probably that she’s got “daddy issues”, not that I blame her given who her father is.

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