Holy Shit, Lindsay Lohan Has Receipts

“Does the scent of tobacco and sex turn you on, lover?”
“Vhy do vriends not care Egor is attacked by sea vitch?”

Not once in Lindsay Lohan’s life has she ever had the receipts for anything. If she says she’s pregnant, you can rest assure she’s not. If she says her fiance has been banging Russian hookers, it’s really an American one. Named Lindsay. And so on and so forth. Except now Radar Online has video of Egor Tarabasov attacking Lindsay on the beach, which ironically is the one aspect of their relationship she was trying to downplay so it didn’t look bad when she went back for the gold she could almost taste. But that was before the Daily Mail offered her a chance – and cash money – to play the part of the survivor, and who is she to deny her one, true love? Cok- acting. Acting.

‘I realise now you can’t stay in a relationship just for love,’ she says.
No woman can be hit and stay with that person if that person isn’t prepared to say sorry.’
The pictures from Mykonos, which have only emerged now, show a tussle occurring after Lohan and Tarabasov argue in a black 4×4.
The 30-year-old actress hurls his mobile phone on to the sand and flees the car. He chases her, grabs her roughly from behind in an attempt to grab the handset back and twists her arm behind her back.
Lohan is reluctant to go into detail about the fight in Mykonos, saying only that she threw Egor’s phone after he took hers. ‘Egor drank too much and he went crazy.’

Look, I don’t want to make light of domestic violence, but here’s the most Lindsay Lohan part of this whole fiasco. The fight footage is from 4th of July weekend when Lindsay and Egor struck a deal with the paparazzi and had their entire weekend photographed, yet they still couldn’t hold their shit together long enough not to blow their scam in front of a Jeep full of dudes aiming every known recording device at them. And I know that seems like I’m blaming the victim, and that’s because I am. Are you fucking kidding me? That poor Russian idiot is going to wake up in three months asking, “Vhere am I? Vhy does dick feel like vire? Vhat do you mean vamily vortune vas stolen by vampire vith vreckles?”

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Photos: AKM-GSI