Lindsay Lohan’s Doing A Super Bowl Commercial

Lindsay Lohan once hit a baby while behind the wheel, so who better to be the face of car insurance than a prominent drug addict who’s been arrested for DUI twice and one time with a hostage? Just don’t ask her about full tort. She’ll think you’re talking about something else, and it’s way too early to talk about retractable colons. Goddammit, let a man finish his coffee. TMZ reports:

We’ve learned Lindsay is shooting a commercial for Esurance, a subsidiary of Allstate, which gives you online or telephonic rate quotes.
We’re told Lindsay is shooting the commercial in Long Beach and we’re guessing it might just run during the Super Bowl.

If there are are any parents out there planning to let their children watch the Super Bowl, you should avoid allowing them within two-to-three feet of any television screens and start an antibiotic regimen roughly two hours before kickoff. However, in the event your child dreams about Lindsay Lohan crawling out of your TV later that night, you have seven days to live and are unbelievably fucked. What were you thinking?

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