Lindsay Lohan Has More Class Than Donald Trump? Wow, Jesus
Because the guy who controls the nuclear arsenal that could vaporize us by dinner was once on live radio speculating on the fuck habits of barely legal former Disney stars, we know that President Donald Trump thinks Lindsay Lohan would be a blast in the sack. And since part of Lindsay Lohan’s self-appointed role as the face of the Syrian refugee crisis of course includes her calling in to an Australian radio show, they asked her about Trump’s preference for banging “deeply deeply troubled” women like herself. Oh, I’m sorry, is none of this making any goddamn sense? Wait, until you hear her response. Via Vanity Fair:
I wish him the best. We live in a world of societies that consistently find fault in people. I think it’s a really scary factor. Taking someone else down is never the answer, and I think we all know that.
That’s either the new-and-improved humanitarian Lindsay Lohan we’re hearing there, or the cool-headed response to an outrageous accusation about herself that can only be explained by the fact that she’s sitting on some serious dirt that she could release at any time. I think most of you already know where this is headed.
“Lindsvey vhere did you get bag of cash and lifetime zupply of disgusting beef?”
“Let’s just say I stumbled onto a golden opportunity last night.”
“Ah, you make pee-pee on idiot American businessman again, yes?”
“I made pee-pee on idiot American businessman again.”
Photo: Ellen von Unwerth/No Tofu, Getty