UPDATE: Lindsay Hired Robert Shapiro

Lindsay Lohan is so determined not to face any consequences for her action that she’s somehow hired superstar lawyer Robert Shapiro who famously helped O.J. Simpson get away with murdering his wife. Then again, I’m sure even Lindsay realizes it’s a matter of when not if she kills someone that won’t be herself because God thinks he’s so fucking funny. TMZ reports:

Sources say Shapiro, who was part of the team that successfully repped O.J. Simpson, will try to convince Judge Marsha Revel to put Lindsay in a rehab facility and either eliminate or minimize jail.
Shapiro, whose son died of a drug overdose in 2005, has a lot of experience with rehab facilities and we’re told he has a specific plan for Lindsay, and a specific place in mind — a live-in rehab facility in which Shapiro is involved. Shapiro created a foundation to help people deal with drug and alcohol problems, named after his son — The Brent Shapiro Foundation.

Now I get why he took the case. If his rehab facility can cure the biggest drug addict in Hollywood, no amount of money can buy that kind of publicity. And if it doesn’t, it’s not like he can’t have her killed and make it look like an overdose. He’s Robert Shapiro. No mere mortal law can contain him.

UPDATE: And Lindsay just checked into Robert Shapiro’s “sober living house” in a last ditch attempt to duck jail. I hope they have a pool with a masseuse. That’s the only way she’ll learn.

Photo: Getty