In an upcoming interview with Playboy, Lakers star Lamar Odom discusses what would happen if a sex tape featuring him and Khloe Kardashian was ever leaked. (I’m assuming this scenario involves Khloe leaking it based on her family’s penchant for whoremongery.) Anyway, what follows is the exact wording you do not want to use while describing your naked wife:
On what would happen if a sex tape of Odom and Khloé leaked: “When people see us in person, they see Khloé’s not small. I’m not small. People see us and are probably like, Damn, I wonder how that looks. We wouldn’t have anything to be ashamed about, but no, that’s not going down.”
Allow me to state for the record that I – being of the genus known as “people” – have never once looked at Khloe and Lamar and went, Damn, I wonder how that looks. I have, however, looked at Khloe and Kourtney and went, Damn, how come the big one doesn’t pick the little one up and eat her like a chicken wing? That I will cop to. You got me there.