Here’s Lady Gaga’s Naked Ad For Her Stupid Perfume That Doesn’t Smell Like She Promised

July 17th, 2012 // 53 Comments
False Advertising
Lady Gaga Meat Dress
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A year and a half ago, Lady GaGa promised the world a revolutionary fragrance that would smell like blood and semen giving it the signature scent of a hooker. I preordered 50 bottles of it, assuming it operated on the same principle as hunters covering themselves in deer piss. Instead, according to her Twitter, we’re now getting “tears of belladonna, crushed heart of tiger orchidea with a black veil of incense, pulverized apricot and the combinative essences of saffron and honey drops” which is not how a hooker smells unless they’re suddenly made out of potpourri now. Then again, I’ve honestly never cut one open to see what’s inside, but I’m sure it’s just pixie dust, pure crystallized joy and whatever else angels are made of.

Photo: Steven Klein

superficial

  1. Urvag

    I would think a perfume from Gaga would smell more like a sweaty ball sac and whatever scent Madonna is wearing these days.

  2. Boy Blunder

    Holy Photoshop Batman!

  3. PopeyesChicken

    I would love to decimate that

  4. J. Pennyworth

    So 2010

  5. Lady GaGa Nude Fame Perfume
    Employee
    Commented on this photo:

    My heart goes out to the 2 poor saps that drew the ‘crotch cover’ short straws.

  6. Dan Quayle

    Crabs

  7. USDA Prime McBeef

    Am I the only one that thinks fatty acid methyl ester when they see FAME in all caps?

  8. DeucePickle

    That sounds like the fragrance I was having made too. Only mine was made with the bile of Dostoyevsky, obliterated beef jerky, and the combinative essences of cock rings and something I call explosivo, and awesome sauce drops.

    *Patent pending*

  9. JC

    Those little dudes should really get a little lawyer and call little OSHA about their working conditions.

  10. Leo

    She’s late to the party with this, just like with everything else. Etat Libre d’Orange already had Secretions Magnifiques out in 2006 – which is a blood and semen (and breast milk, among others) perfume.

  11. Cock Dr

    I would prefer my “Gulliver’s Travels on Acid” to be a bit more colorful.
    People will buy it….because they have disposable income and they can. Go figure.

  12. kimmykimkim

    Damn, that’s a hot body.

  13. cc

    In this new version of ‘Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark’, a manufactured celebrity moves into a house occupied by miniature sumo wrestlers who are attracted to the smell of stank. One day, against everyone’s advice, she decides to pose provocatively. The mini-sumos pour out of the ventilation system and ravage her body, looking for orifices to invade.

  14. So Shaquille O’Neal is doing bukkake porn now?

  15. ace11

    Looks Great

    Marvelous Body

  16. Mike

    Thanks for this Fish. Your words are like Dane Cook being violated by a sea lion. Both hilarious and educational.

  17. Mandy

    I know every picture of a celebrity is photoshopped these days, so it’s almost pointless to say this – but her boobs look NOTHING like that. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with her boobs, but if you look at any “candid” photo of her, they’re no where near close to this image.

    The entire body looks like someone else. She’s always touting about being proud of who you are. It’s a shame she isn’t.

  18. Lady GaGa Nude Fame Perfume
    Commented on this photo:

    If you wanted something that smells like blood and semen, you could probably just have her breathe on you.

  19. Mike

    This isn’t a perfume ad. It’s a Lady Gaga ad. The bottle is so small this virtually qualifies as a subliminal message. Which reminds me, I have to buy small guys to crawl all over my body for some reason.

  20. Madison

    I hate her!!!!! She is sooooo demonic!!! She’s just plain evil… Does everyone know about her friend that died like 2 months before she made it big! The funny thing is she stole everything from this girl, her look, style, and sound! Her friend when she killed herself “aka was murdered by Gaga” was just about to break in and then she dies and Gaga comes out of nowhere.. Kind of weird just saying also her paparazzi video is making fun of that girls death. Ugh I hate evil people..

    • You are referring to Lina Morgana, who was nothing like Stefani. She looked somewhat similar to her when they both had brown hair, but Stefani’s voice was always the stronger, more unique sounding one – not to mention she was the one writing songs for Lina. Ultimately, the style Stefani went for with her Lady Gaga character is very different from the grunge rock thing Lina was doing despite the fact that Stefani came from doing mainly piano rock.

    • LIna committed suicide by jumping off a roof, because she was unhappy. If you watch videos, she often appears a bit drugged out and lethargic.

      The video ‘Paparazzi’ does not mock suicide, but rather makes a shocking statement about how the Paparazzi feeds on tragedy. In the video, the photographers take pictures of her attempted murder rather than help her. They sit by to watch and profit on her failure. Nothing in the imagery of the video strikes me as funny, just mildly disturbing.

      • kimmykimkim

        Anjyp, thank you. You saved me the trouble. It’s extremely easy to google that Lina chick and see immediately that there is nothing similar about the two.

      • Devilish Diva

        I never met Lina Morgana but I travelled in the same circles. This was a girl whose mother would allow her as a 13/14 year old to “sleep over” at a recording studio where there would just be an older male music producer. No parental supervision. She probably killed herself b/c she realized she was being pimped out and she probably wouldn’t become famous from it.

  21. popwilleatitself

    It’s just us little people trying to get a sense of fame. Her feelings about us are so subtle.

  22. Lord Invader

    Perhaps Gaga caught a whiff of Lindsay Lohan’s hair and decided the original plan wasn’t such a good idea.

  23. welldoneson

    Every since Gwen Stefani made more money in one year off perfume than she did from her solo albums and tours, I knew this gonzo stage addict would be trying it.

    Now, back to work on my fragrance…

  24. Lady GaGa Nude Fame Perfume
    bloop
    Commented on this photo:

    So, Lilliput is apparently populated by tiny, gay men. Man, stuff’s really changed since Jack Black was there.

  25. Deacon

    I like the ad! Hot and weird, just like Gaga.

  26. anonymous

    I noticed they had to cover her cock with two or three of those gremlins.

  27. I like GaGa obviously, and I love perfume.

  28. Lady GaGa Nude Fame Perfume
    lori
    Commented on this photo:

    That doesn’t appear to be something I would like to smell like.

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