The Whoresition To Kris Kardashian Has Begun

October 14th, 2013 // 19 Comments
What A Complete Surprise
Kris Bruce Jenner
Kris & Bruce Announce Separation Read More »

Step 1: Black guys. Check.

Now that she’s done pretending Bruce Jenner didn’t flee to his own house that doesn’t reek of the dying innocence of his daughters, Kris Jenner can now begin the process of changing her name back to Kris Kardashian because Robert was always her true love, you guys. That’s why she had to cheat on him so much with Bruce, this guy who’s definitely Khloe‘s real father, O.J. Simpson and a bunch of other dudes whose carcasses have yet to be found. Via Radar Online:

In an interview with New You magazine, the reality star reveals her biggest-ever regret.
“The one regret, if I had to do it over, would be divorcing Robert Kardashian,” she candidly admits.
The interview was conducted after Kris and Bruce split but before their separation became public.

If anything, Kris should revert back to her maiden name of “Houghton” which, according to my research, is an old British derivative for “Whoretonshire,” or “She without soul who whores children and then in the darkness binds them to reality contracts.”

Photos: AGUA BENDITA/Splash News


  1. Kat

    That must be so fun for her other two kids to hear.

  2. If Satan exists, God must too, right?

  3. Kendall Jenner Bikini Agua Bendita
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    If it makes money and doesn’t break the law it’s gotta be ok…..right? That’s what capitalism is all about!

  4. Kendall Jenner Bikini Agua Bendita
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Choice profit opportunities don’t last forever. You must exploit them ASAP.

  5. Kendall Jenner Bikini Agua Bendita
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Once you’ve established a brand be sure to get it out there under the public’s eye as much as possible.

  6. Kendall Jenner Bikini Agua Bendita
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    R U feeling the urge to purchase crappy overpriced swimwear yet?

  7. Kendall Jenner Bikini Agua Bendita
    Commented on this photo:

    Her feet are pretty large.

  8. There’s a text on Ray J’s phone right now that says “If you’re all out of dignity, let’s corner the GILF celebrity sex tape market.”

    He won’t see it until he goes on break at Best Buy. Another write up for that shit and he’s fired.

  9. 132lbsnutsack

    This troll is a failure at everything she’s ever attempted to do in life with the exception of being a very successful pimp. I really feel sorry for all her children. They were born and raised to be manipulated and to manipulate others. They’ve never been allowed to have their own lives or make their own decisions. She is desperate. Nothing is off limits as long as it brings in a dollar. Somebody do her grandkids a favor and pour a bucket of water on this sociopath and melt her nasty ass off the planet.

  10. So who’s waiting for her sex tape to be “leaked?”

  11. If she made a sex tape 30 years ago, I’d buy it. At one time she was really hot. If it was just made fairly recently, I wouldn’t mind taking a look, but I certainly wouldn’t spend any money to check it out.

  12. Mel Gibson's Shrink

    I don’t even understand why women take their husbands’ names in the first place in this day and age, let alone keep them after divorce! Call me a feminist but I kept my maiden name after marriage. Fuck that shit.

  13. Kendall Jenner Bikini Agua Bendita
    Edvard Munch
    Commented on this photo:

    Wallflower. she doesn’t do a thing for me.

  14. Having had it explained that a “Halloween Oreo” is a sandwich of two black men and an orange woman, Kris enthusiastically responded “Hells yeah!”

  15. Kendall Jenner Bikini Agua Bendita
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet Jesus Kid, eat more protein,like two whole chickens as that swimsuit not going to sell except to pedophiles. Utterly Gross …

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