The Kardashian Khristmas Special is Kanceled

November 28th, 2011 // 68 Comments

Seen here volunteering at the LA Mission for reasons I’m willing to accept have nothing to do with her divorce exposing her as a cash-hungry cuntbag woven from the finest whore-hair (Read: Hello, black penis.), Kim Kardashian and her puppet master Kris Jenner have canceled plans for a Kardashian Khristmas Special which, yes, was actually called that. Page Six reports:

An insider says apart from the unhappy split, family members including sisters Kourtney and Khloe, brother Rob, and parents Kris and Bruce Jenner had “too many commitments” to film the show together. “It didn’t look promising due to schedule conflicts, but once Kim’s divorce happened it was definitely not possible,” our source said.

I probably shouldn’t have even written this post because if you’re like me, you had no idea a Kardashian Khristmas Special was even possible, so this is like finding out Megan Fox was going to bang you, but then a terrorist crashed into her vagina. I don’t know how you tell the two apart. Anyway, good luck enjoying a holiday without watching the Kardashians murder Santa Claus for his sack of toys before banishing Khloe to the Island of Misfit Toys or wherever the Abominable Snowman lived. Wookiee Mountain? Close enough.

Adding… Now we know Jennifer Love Hewitt is not only a Twi-hard, but also a krazed Kardashian fan. And yet she can’t find a husband. Weird.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    Isn’t that Zoe Saldana you’re not mentioning?

  2. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    skunk
    Commented on this photo:

    she wants his black dick on a platter

  3. ChinoLatino

    First Bitchess!!!!!

  4. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, Jennifer. As if trying to break my heart with all the sweatpants wasn’t bad enough, now you’ve gone and gotten whpre all over yourself.

  5. JC

    When reached for comment, Baby Jesus said, “Phew. Well, that’s at least one thing I don’t have to weep over.”

  6. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Uncle Phil
    Commented on this photo:

    “Guys, seriously. I don’t have a ‘type.’ I don’t know why people are always saying that.”

  7. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Uncle Phil
    Commented on this photo:

    JLH is doing it right. Go hang out with fat people and you look thin again.

  8. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Uncle Phil
    Commented on this photo:

    “They never covered this in my ServSafe classes.”

  9. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    She stipulated that all of the “dirties” must wear gloves. Fair enough, but what in the heck is Kirk Douglas doing there?

  10. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    “And so I said ‘I don’t care if it’s our wedding night- you’re cappuccino at best.’”

  11. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    Uh oh. I was making a “Haha- that bum looks like Kirk Douglas joke”. But that’s actually him, isn’t it?

  12. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck that closing quotation mark. Fuck it to hell.

  13. it had to be said

    Officer Friendly’s been guzzling water all day to save up for this. Preparation is always the key to quality police work.

  14. Karen

    In other words…”The Kardashian Klan realized that no one gives a flying f*%$ what they do for Christmas and wouldn’t tune in to watch this mess”. Yeah..we get it.

  15. Gilmore Girl

    Did she actually do anything besides pose for pictures while “volunteering” at LA Mission? What a ho bag! I hope no one here watched their show last night.

    • BE

      Just the KJ spin. If she makes KK look like she’s some sort of a humanitarian (ha!) then we’ll forget that joke of a wedding they just cashed in on.
      Alas, there just aren’t enough soup kitchens…

  16. Frank Burns

    Is Megan Fox still the go-to reference for sexually desirable women? I’m not contesting the idea, I’m just trying to keep track.

  17. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    The photo is to memorialize the first meeting of the “Baffled by Marriage” club.

  18. kikay

    I don’t Kare!

  19. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    “This is a great place to get rid of stale wedding cake!”

  20. Sarah

    Does anyone else think its strange that the Kardashians “don’t have enough time” to film a Christmas special? Last I checked their show was supposed to be reality television so aren’t they supposed to be filmed living their everyday lives? Just wondering…

    • shilla

      my thoughts exactly.

      • BE

        I’m dating myself by saying that the sham wedding was the cherry on top of the Kardashian overexposure – think MC Hammer.

        Except, of course, that Hammer actually had talent AND most people thought he was a decent human being.

  21. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    CANTSTOPSTARING
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim: Congratulations on the pregnancy! I think it’s really brave to be a single mom.
    Love: :-/

  22. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    CANTSTOPSTARING
    Commented on this photo:

    In every picture like this, there’s always a Jennifer Love Hewitt in the background saying it all with her eye.

  23. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Rico Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    This “volunteer” work looks like nothing more than a photo op.

    • karlito

      of course it’s a photo op. do you think this selfish, naracisstic bitch cares about anybody but herself. he ego is bigger than her ass. now if she would only stay down there for the rest of her life she would make the rest of us happy.

  24. Clarence Beeks

    HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

    Fuck them ALL!!!

  25. cc

    ‘Kardashian Khristmas Special’

    If I believed in God, I’d also believe that he’d regret sacrificing his son for our sins.

  26. DARTH VADER

    NNNOOOOOOOOoooOOOOooOOOOOoooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  27. The joaker

    I guess they think the starting “c” words with “k” is cute, but I think Mortal Kombat. And I want to Finish Them. Kunts.

    • Juano

      Using a “K” in Christmas just shows how clueless they are. Christmas starts with a “C” for a reason, and whether you are Christian or not, you should respect that.

      Although I do think their show and lives are “KRAP”.

  28. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Pebblz
    Commented on this photo:

    Aren’t you supposed to wear a hair net in a food preparation environment? You’d think there was some exception set in place for people who are completely unawares of the paparazzi they had invited.

  29. This just proves there is a God.

  30. freaky

    My grandmother, rest her soul, was a devoutly religious woman. I once got a ten minute lecture about the evils of abbreviating Christmas as “X-mas” because, you know, the whole jeebus connection and stuff. I imaging that if Grandma were alive today, she would muster every ounce of strength in her old frame to drive herself to LA to claw our Kris Jenner’s eyes for even contemplating a substitution of her whore initials for that of Grandma’s Lord and Saviour.

  31. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    It turns out that “A Very Special Kim Khloe Kourtney Christmas” wasn’t testing out to be as popular with the Black Community as they’d hoped.

  32. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Mike701
    Commented on this photo:

    “Rowwrrr!’ He can pee on me anytime!” “Uhmmm Miss Kardashian? You’re drooling.”

  33. forrest gump

    I’m so sorry I have’t met her at ” DASH”, calabasas.
    my plans were to marry her!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  34. Euroman

    $5 says she did the big black police dude after her photo-op volunteering ended – sex tape to be released next time their ratings tank.

  35. How ironic would that be if they called it “The Kardashian Khristmas Kavalcade”?

  36. Johnny Cochran's Tumor

    I’m krushed.

  37. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet she’s thinking something along the lines of “Why am I taking a photo with these talentless white bitches?” while trying to suppress her laughter.

  38. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    The exact moment one of the cameramen recognized Zoe Saldana and turned around.

  39. Jack Ketch

    WHOOT !!! is all I’ve got to say :) Yay.

  40. Cock Dr

    MOO

  41. BE

    +infinity

    Klueless describes it all right. Krap on the institution of marriage with this poorly staged fiasco then, Krap on baby Jesus himself. What a kredit to the human race!

    Maybe a light bulb has (finally) dawned over KJ’s narcissistic little brain to maker her wonder, just once, if ALL of her marketing “gems” work.

  42. BE

    All K’d out now…

  43. whocares

    Please NO more posts about the KRAZY KARDASHIAN … no one cares anymore… thanks:)

  44. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    “I wonder if they’ll notice if this turkey baster goes missing,” Jennifer thought to herself.

  45. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    This must have been some star-studded event, if they got Kathy Griffin to work the red carpet.

  46. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    “My daughter-in-law looks younger every year!”

  47. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, would you mind if I date Kris once the divorce is final?”

  48. Kim Kardashian Homeless Shelter Volunteer Thanksgiving Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    “And when you push this button, it grates the carrots. Did I ever tell you about the time I showed President Bush how a supermarket scanner works? ‘Cause this feels a lot like that.”

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