Kim Kardashian & Kanye West Banged For The Cover Of A Magazine Because They’re So Private

Here’s Kim Kardashian demonstrating her new-found love of privacy by getting plowed by Kanye West on the cover of French magazine L’Officiel Hommes because this’ll really make people forget she’s only famous for filming a sex tape with a famous black musician. A sex tape that almost died in a fire over the weekend if it wasn’t for Kris Jenner absolutely sucking at arson. TMZ reports:

The master — think of it as the Mona Lisa of sex tapes — was secured in a safe inside Vivid honcho Steve Hirsch’s office. When the blaze erupted Saturday night … Hirsch was miles away at an L.A. Clippers game.
Hirsch got the 911 call and bailed immediately, because the safe not only contains Kim’s tape but every unedited master of every celebrity sex tape in Vivid’s stable, including the ones starring Kendra Wilkinson, Pam and Tommy Lee, Jimi Hendrix, Vince Neil, Tom Sizemore, and Chyna.

Legend has it the unedited master contains the infamous golden shower scene between Kim and Ray J that she negotiated to keep out of the Vivid release, so the authorities would do well to look for who stands to gain the most here. Which is obviously Jimi Hendrix who can’t fucking believe he’s in the same safe as Chyna. “Motherfucker, that’s a man!” *shoots flames out of his ghost guitar*

Photo: Splash News