Kim Kardashian: ‘Hey, Whitney Houston Died. Look At My Boobs!’
I don’t even know where to start this morning, so Kim Kardashian waving her giant breasts around at Clive Davis’ pre-Grammy party seems like as good a place as any. So here she inexplicably is at the annual party Whitney Houston was supposed to open except she never made it out of the bathroom. (Women, amirite?) At any rate, the decision was made to keep the party going to honor Whitney which makes perfect sense until you realize this conversation didn’t happen so they might as well have zipped open the coroner’s bag and pissed on her corpse:
CLIVE: Alright, I’m going to stay home because it’s just way too emotional. I found that girl…
ASSISTANT: Of course, Mr. Davis, everything’s under control. We’re going to have a moment of silence, the whole night will be very tasteful.
CLIVE: Wonderful, wonderful. And none of those Kardashians will be there to milk Whitney’s death right?
ASSISTANT: …. I’ll just go ahead and fire myself now.
(Right onto her corpse.)