Khloe Kardashian’s Not One of Them!

Seen here proving she does shop in the maternity section, Khloe Kardashian is allegedly the result of an affair between Kris Jenner and another man thus making Khloe not a real Kardashian like everyone with a set of eyes always suspected. (For those of you keeping score at home, that’s two theories confirmed in two sentences. BOOMSHAKALAKA.) Then again, the source of this information is Scott Disick, the controversial boyfriend of Kourtney Kardashian and noted sweater-around-the-neck wearer which makes his credibility suspect because you can’t trust those people outside of conversations involving yachts. InTouch Weekly reports:

Fed up with the Kardashian clan — especially Kris — Scott has been mulling a lucrative offer to write a scathing tell-all about the family. “He has vowed not to sell out Kourtney personally, but he doesn’t mind talking about the rest of the family,” the insider shares, adding that these days, “he really can’t stand to be in the same room with Kris.” Desperate to be free of Kourtney’s mom’s “controlling” ways but eager to stay in the limelight, Scott is thinking that writing a tell-all could solve all of his problems. “He wants to break away from the Kardashian brand and do his own thing,” the insider explains.

Despite all those things I said before for comedic effect, I’m actually on board with this accusation. (Also, I think I found the father here.) I mean, c’mon, just look at this promo shot for the Kardashian’s swimwear line. Even after 85 tons of airbrushing, they still shoved Khloe as far to the left as possible so people would stop thinking it’s an ad for wrestling. “So, are those chicks like the big dude’s groupies? Or do they just set up tables and shit for him to fall into? I’m confused, but mostly want to have sex with the little one if we’re strictly talking dominant themes here.”

Photos: Splash News