Kevin Federline to sell sex tape

November 14th, 2006 // 136 Comments
britney-spears-santa-01-thumb.jpg

In the smartest – and sleaziest – move yet, Kevin Federline is using his alleged 4-hour sex tape with Britney Spears to leverage custody of the children and $30 million. He’s already been offered $50 million by companies wanting to distribute it on the web, but says he’d sell it back to Britney for $30 million and custody of their two kids. A source close to Federline says:

“At the time the two of them were in the honeymoon stages of the relationship and couldn’t keep their hands off each other. They did nothing all day but have sex – and play the odd game of chess. They were insatiable and they believed they would be together forever. Britney didn’t think twice about making the video at the time. She mistakenly believed that their love would last. They adored filming each other. They lived their lives in front of the cameras – even making a short-lived reality TV show of their exploits. Sex was no different to them, it seems. Now this video could prove very costly to her. Millions of people will be prepared to pay to watch. Kevin has told Britney she should comply with his demands otherwise the whole world will see her having sex, which will be devastating. At the moment Kev is in talks with a company in Arizona about putting the four-hour sex vid online. If it all goes to plan he’ll make [$50 million] from it.”

If Britney doesn’t cave and hand over the children I’m sure a judge will. Because when you see a man of such moral character and integrity as Kevin Federline there’s no way you can deny him the privelege of raising children. This guy makes Abraham Lincoln look like Hitler.

And just cause, here are some shots of Britney Spears rocking a Santa hat in mid Novemeber at a New York pharmacy. Don’t ask what’s going on in that above shot, because even God himself wouldn’t be able to tell you.

superficial

  1. mrs.t

    Is that guy in the pics her old Manny from way back last year? Betcha they’re hooking up.

  2. wedgeone

    #99 – What about in the shape of a G-clef? She is a musician, yes?
    Fuggin funny as he11!

  3. Wait a sec! Wasn’t she the one to file for divorce when he was out of town? She couldn’t have the forsight to get ahold of the tape and anything else incriminating?!?!?

  4. Tits_McGhee

    Wow, I underestimated K-Fed. He’s not so mentally handicrapped after all. I mean, that plan’s brill. Dumb fuck Brit!

    Sweetie, odds are that if you make a sex tape, it will be seen by other individuals. Have we not learned from Pam and Tommy?

    Here’s a little riddle for Brit:

    Q: What the difference between true love and herpes?

    A: Herpes lasts forever.

  5. Talk about an idiot – he should have just sold the tape. Now I wouldn’t be surprised if it gets held up in court for months before it can even be sold. By that time he will have starved to death.

    http://www.famousidiots.blogspot.com

  6. Captain Awesome

    haha and here I thought that K-Fed couldnt be a bigger piece of shit in life.

    We have plane crashes, random car jackings, random acts by mother nature, and buffalo stampedes. Yet hes allowed to walk?

    This is why I know God doesnt exist.

  7. Troller

    I have no doubt that he will sell the tape and live very comfortably the rest of his life, probably somewhere like Abu Dhabi.

    @43. Better if he lived out his life at Abu Graib – complete with the hood, the dogs, etc.

  8. Ideal situation:

    K-Fed sells sex tape for 50mill, gets back to impregnating women.

    Britney puts up kids for adoption, focuses on returning to land of hotness.

    No one heres from K-Fed again.

  9. checkyourshorts

    Booyakasha.
    I remember a time when Britney was busy faking injuries and gaining weight – before marriage and even K-Fed.
    What did fucking this redneck have to do with it? He was a symptom of her larger disease – pointlessness.

  10. LOL! There’s already a Flash Game of Kevin Federline dropping the sex tape and Britney Spears catching them all:

    http://www.tacosntonic.com/flash/PlayBritneySpears.php

    Hilarious!

  11. marshmallow-dream

    #70 – you want to see some guys cock – the only thing revealing about that is that you are warped. if by trolling you mean someone has access to your ID or has your identical ID, you are fool for not changing your ID. you’re just an asshole. truth hurts, eh?

    #71 – go spend some time with your kids mommy, and quit spending so much time on the internet. you are too pathetic – i feel sorry for you and your children.

  12. BigJim

    112. Sorry, it’s awkward, but someone has to ask, … do you prefer lube, or dry mount when having your rectum pounded mercilessly?

    BJLTC ;^o

  13. Milandir

    What is the scandal? Britney had sex with her husband? Yeah, marital sex, what a disgrace!

  14. falconeddierulz

    Why is she worried about ruining her pure image when it does not exist to begin with? I’ll be pissed though if Fagerline gets a 30-50 million payout for handing over that tape; he’s scum and I want to see his sorry ass broke again, returning to a life of back up dancing and food stamps.
    Britney should pay to have someone off his ass, should be easy considering he’s a low life anyway, or Brit could have him framed for major drug possession, she’s got the money to make it happen and who wouldn’t want to fuck up this turd’s life?

  15. killeristic

    HE IS SUCH A BITCH!! cant he just leave brit and kid alone? :/

  16. aurealis

    Hmmm. What could Britney (soon to be divorsee, sex tape star, recent manhole for K-fed, and all-around hoe) need four bag-fulls of from CVS? The words ‘ointment’ and ‘extra strength douche’ come to mind.

  17. NipsyHustle

    #116
    Earl is just giving brit a reality check. this is what happens when you meet, fuck, and shack up with a freeloading, baby daddy, thug life wigga in less than a week of knowing him. obviously he is an opportunist but had she not been thinking with her crotch from day one, she would have been smart enough NOT to:

    1) marry a man who lied to you about having a girlfriend and kids for the first 2 months of your relationship
    2) pay child support for his other kids because he’s too trifling to get a real job
    3) have babies with someone who has shown such disregard for family, children, and commitment
    4) give this unemployed back up dancer a Amex Black card then cry when he’s spending you into the poor house
    5)make a sex tape with this schmuck who has proven nothing is sacred in his world other than himself.
    6)get married in a matching “pimp” and “maid” tracksuits then cry because he doesn’t respect you

    jeez, i could go on all day. it’s called karma. she was quick to steal him now she can’t get rid of him quietly. don’t feel sorry for her making her own bed. feel sorry for all his kids who have to deal with the fact that the whole galaxy knows their father was a deadbeat exploiter.

  18. haha the tape is real!!

    i saw the pictures and video at http://www.twelvefifteen.net

    well, at least i hope its real…otherwise, i’m stuck waiting for the drama to explode!! oh the agony!!

  19. kacsing

    LAST!

  20. Kim

    #77. I know that Brit exposing her boobs is not breaking news! I was just simply commenting on how it took so long for anyone to mention it. Sorry I don’t spend all of my time on this site looking at Brit’s boobs to know how often she shows them… you seem to have kept an exact count…get a life!

  21. happy hands club

    Did anyone notice she’s standing right next to the Cheetos?

  22. wedgeone

    #122 – OMG!! That is TOO HILARIOUS!!
    I can’t believe that no one (myself included) noticed that.

  23. wedgeone

    #119 – We debunked that video way back when the story broke that the court ruled against Brit and K-Earl’s lawsuit against US magazine. That is not Brit in that movie. I have the entire clip if you want it- you can see at the end of the clip that it’s not her.
    Got back into the the Fish’s archives & read the blog for that article.

  24. jrzmommy

    marshmallow–I would spend time with my kids, but you see, they’re in school — a place at which you obviously haven’t spent much time– and if I spent all the time I wish I could spend with them then they’d be truant — a concept with which you are all too familar. So zip it, lock it, and stuff it in your pocket, jerkoff.

  25. jrzmommy

    Marshmallow is totally DanYELL. FUCKING TOTALLY.

  26. Kim

    #123 Remember as NipsyHustle pointed out to me about my comment on her exposed boobs, Britney and Cheetos are not breaking news either. God forbid you actually point out the obvious on this site! We are supposed to have in depth discussions on her complicated life.

    P.S. Wedgeone, this is not a dig at you or happy hands.

  27. so federline has the last laugh after all,amazing.

    http://www.celebriteaze.blogspot.com/

  28. marshmallow-dream

    #113 – you are sick. get a life … you post here every day you loser. Take a break from the internet. do you often have such obscene imaginings? you are a walking sicko

    #125 – oh, great parent you are – spending all day on the internet while your kids are in school – your family must be proud of all you accomplish – yeah, real mother of the year

  29. camabron

    They deserved eachother. I hope the tape gets out ’cause this brainless biatch certainly doesn’t deserve to be worth 100 mill.

  30. HughJorganthethird

    I’d buy it, but only if it involves at least half an hour of Brit tossing KFed’s salad. Oh yeah and scat, lot’s o scat.

  31. jaysaj

    Brit should have known better but i still sympathize with her and her kids – the kids especially. K-FED MUST BE PUT IN A NUT HOUSE! THAT IS WHERE HE BELONGS; or better yet,in a garbage dump in Mercury.

  32. Amazing. Brings whole new meaning to “Playing With Fire”. If only this dude was half as tough as he’d like to believe…

  33. ByMennon

    Anyone else wonder why she doesn’t hire some goons to go ransack his place and steal the tape back? I mean let’s be honest, he’s wayyy to stupid to have made copies

  34. tim

    kfed’s next stop

  35. herbiefrog

    we’re confused…

    already seen her vagina
    she has had two children
    so obviously has sex
    she alive
    so why wouldnt you expect her to have enjoyed herself?

    oh its him…
    …its like he’s been planning this all along
    …oh that is sad

    and you think people will pay?

    lol bitch

  36. hey, he’s got balls

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