Ke$ha’s Just Your Average, Everyday, Penis Costume-Loving Praying Mantis

And Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. Did I not mention that?

I entirely forgot Ke$ha was still a thing, but apparently Glamour didn’t because here she is talking to them about devouring men after she mates and/or making them wear giant cock costumes for her amusement. So basically she’s a really, really shitty version of Lady GaGa who’s a shitty version of Madonna. She’s the square root of shit:

GLAMOUR: How big’s the gap between Ke$ha in real life and Ke$ha onstage, drinking men’s blood and dancing with a giant bouncing penis?
KE$HA: I’m just very amused by five-year-old humor. Don’t get me wrong: I do destroy men on a weekly basis. It’s like a hobby. I’m like a praying mantis. They f–k me, and then I eat them. But who isn’t amused by a giant, dancing penis? Sometimes when I’m sad, I make my assistant put on the penis outfit and bounce around my house.

I’m not gonna lie if I had an assistant – Photo Boy doesn’t count considering he’s protected by the sexual harassment handbook because we work for Communist China. – I’m pretty sure I’d make he/she dress like a giant penis, too. Except I’d take it one step further and make the door to my office a giant vagina and then constantly call the police to report a door rape. “Oh, what? Just because it has brushed nickel knobs, that door was asking for it? And you call yourself a feminist, Sally. Take her away!”

Photos: Getty, Splash News, WENN

Tags: Kesha