Justin Bieber is Above the Law

Because it’s important for every child star to build their way up to running over a baby with a car, Justin Bieber got his first taste of celebrity justice over the weekend after throwing a water balloon at a state trooper which, surprise, is what happens when you give a 16-year-old kid a billion dollar music franchise. (See, also: Handjobs from Kim Kardashian.) E! News reports:

Our source says that Bieber was having a blast tossing water balloons at people’s crotches backstage…until he made direct contact with the ticked-off state trooper, who was part of a unit on hand for crowd control.
Bieber then retreated to his trailer while his bodyguard successfully persuaded the officer not to put a black mark on the kid’s squeaky-clean record (not including the madness that ensues among his fans when his very name is mentioned).
A state police spokesman described Bieber’s behavior Sunday as “inappropriate,” but he confirmed that no incident report was written and no further action will be taken against the teen or his entourage.

I can’t help but feel that a happier, less soul-crushing ending to this story would’ve been seeing Justin get thrown into a middle school dance as the officer pretends his gun is too wet to shoot. (Been there.) “Sorry, kid. – *click click* – But you really shouldn’t get water in these thing- HOLY DICK! THAT GIRL ATE YOUR FACE.”

Photos: Pacific Coast News