Of all the natural wonders of the world, Jon Hamm‘s penis truly hangs mightily above them all. A girthuous gift from God himself to remind us, his most beloved creation, that sometimes a penis can be a masterful work of art, and if one should attempt to hide such beauty with garments of thread, they should be cast out upon the rocks where there is much weeping and gnashing of smaller penises. A warning that AMC has boldly mocked with such arrogance, its children’s children shall call themselves fortunate to not feel the coming smiting of the Lord deep within their holiest of holies. NY Daily News reports:
An AMC insider tells Confidenti@l that during filming of the sixth season of the hit show — when the ’60s-style clothing was a tight fit — Hamm was politely instructed by a staffer at the network to please wear underwear while shooting his scenes.
“This season takes place in the 1960s, where the pants are very tight and leave little to the imagination,” a source tells us. “Jon’s impressive anatomy is so distracting that they politely insisted on underwear.”
Our insider says that during seasons one and two, AMC’s marketing team even had to do some Photoshop magic on promotional booklets that went out to press in order to make his privates more, well, private.
When reached for comment an AMC spokesman said, “Listen, if you think about it, we really did Jon Hamm’s penis a favor by bringing it over here on a ship. Instead of being a bit character after bit character in CBS police procedurals, we gave it food and shelter. And who knows? Sometimes in these situations penises are benevolently set free into this God-given land of opportunity instead of having its ownership transferred to a relative in a will. Granted, we’re probably going with that, but the option’s there if we ever change our minds. Which we won’t.” Later, AMC would beat Jon Hamm’s penis with a whip before selling its wife to Oxygen. It would have its revenge on them all.
h/t Jezebel
Photos: Splash News
These are old snaps but it’s a good enough excuse to run them again.
no excuse needed to run these pics again ;)
So if conservatives aren’t racist if they call themselves “Frederick Douglass Republicans,” then they’re not homophobic if they call themselves “Jon Hamm Republicans”? That’s how I’m reading that last paragraph.
I want now in and around my mouth
Something tells me if he ever loses a leg he’ll get along just fine.
This blasphemy will not stand! TO WAR!
Would Hamm Jr. get special guest star acknowledgment on the shows where Hamm doesn’t wear underwear?
His girlfriend has a serious case of frozen face from too much Botox, lol. And she’s only 42 ? Yikes.
Maybe but she can also unhinge her jaw which is absolutely essential for gobbling a 6-ft Hamm-wich.
Entirely possible :)
Oh my !!
Wow I can see the whole thing. He could be walking around butt-naked & it’d make no difference.
It would make a difference, we’d be able to watch it swing majestically as cherubs dart to and fro adorning it with garlands of flowers.
In other words, the cherubs would be serving in the role of Dong Draper?
oh honey, it’d make 10 inches of difference!!!
that thing can oppress me anytime!! ;)-
No tailor will ever need to ask him what side he dresses to.
Looks like he has dad dick.
Jon Hamm‘s ham. ‘Nuff said.
Ah yes. Jon Hamm. Why can’t there be more men like you?
If I had a schwanze like that it would drag on the ground (and it does).
Oh, stop it…
I’m sorry to say those of us who were alive in the eighties regularly saw shlongs down to the knees in tight pants. You might be able to fake balls, but not that kind of snake. Of course, I live in Quebec, where every guy is well hung….
Uncircumcised, I see.
Dude’s who wear tight pants and no underwear are creepy…Jon Hamm or not….
“CUZ I’M FREEEEEEE….FREE BALLIN” – Tom Petty
Prop gone wrong.
There´s only one thing more disgusting than a circumcised penis…having to actually look at his perpetually exposed knob through his freakin pants *vomit*
Omg, these pictures. :D How can he dress like that with an asset like that? If I would be his wife I would tell him wear underwear and loose pants.
What’s the big whoop? Looks pretty regular size to me.
Coming from an expert, this is absolutely photoshopped.
Talent,looks,and a big dick….poor Jon.
either way I bet the people at Barney s loved watching him walk by. Myself I would be so happy in helping try on anything that requires him remove his pants, yummy