John Mayer does standup

May 23rd, 2007 // 33 Comments

This is a video of John Mayer doing some standup at the Comedy Cellar over the weekend. Although I can’t figure out if it’s supposed to be funny. Judging by the audience reaction I’d say maybe, but judging by the words coming out of his mouth I’d say no. I’ve heard funnier material listening to terminally ill patients talk about their dead pets.


  1. Jacks0


  2. BarbadoSlim

    This shit’s old and irrelevant. STEP UP YOUR GAME superfish!!!!

  3. I love him. He doesn’t take himself seriously, which is great in this age of Paris Hiltons and Britney Spears who think they are entitled to everything while acting like spoiled, white trash brats.

  4. djthecat

    I love him too! And he dumped Jessica Simpson, so he’s gotta be okay…

  5. Chauncey Gardner

    If the fucker wants to make me laugh, all he has to do is sing.

  6. #4

    You’re an idiot. Jessica Simpson is the perfect woman:

    -Great face
    -Great body
    -Dumb as a bag of hammers

  7. If theres a bustle in your hedgerow don’t be alarmed now…

  8. pope

    Fish, ol’ bean, this is at least two days, maybe three old.

    One thing about John Mayer is he isn’t so stuck on himself that he worries about his “rep”

    Having said that, he needs to work on his material a bit, decent but not side-splitting funny.

  9. djthecat


    Jessica Simpson HAD the great face and great body til she tried to be vanessa m. now she looks like beef jerky on steroids. she is dumb, though…

  10. #9

    I’ll bet she still smokes the land monster you’re with.

  11. djthecat

    #10, I am a GIRL.

  12. Haha. He’s pretty good! I love John Mayer. And, I think he has a gorgeous voice.

  13. James

    Haha, the material was actually not bad.

  14. Chaz

    Wow, his stand up is worse than his music. Didn’t think that was possible.

  15. Ruby

    @6 – is she as dumb as a bag of star wars action figures?

  16. caljenna66

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!! “A size 12 Jordan up her ovaries…” Okay, I should be offended, but that was f—ing funny!

  17. Carpediem

    I think hanging out with jessica simpson will give him some real good material!

  18. Ugh, he should stick to singing. On second thought, he should just move to a secluded island with Jessica and spare us all…

    BTW – because i read this site and another one everday, I just thought I’d share this site that makes fun of regular schmucks –

    They’ll even post your picture and make fun of you, you know, if you’re in to that kind of thing.

  19. I bet thiz old shit
    won’t get anymore
    young puzzy……

    He muzt of had a
    peniz the size of
    Florida..or waz a
    great buttmuncher.

  20. Wonky

    Didn’t get a single laugh. What gives?

  21. funnygator

    You know what – he’s really not that bad. Not a RIOT, but.. come on. He hasn’t been doing it long, but he’s comfortable, has an idea of his own stage identity, and has a couple of clever ideas. Take it easy, Phish… don’t hate him just because he’s doing something new.

  22. Jared

    He’s a better guitar player than most of you could imagine, and he’s not bad at standup. Let’s get real here, that wasn’t terrible. He’s not Seinfeld, but I’ve seen worse on Comedy Central.

  23. Roop

    Funnier than Kid from Kid n Play but not the laugh riot that is Al Gore.

  24. misslavey

    The video isn’t working now because it was made private by the youtube user :(

  25. FINALLY the Fish posts something I was actually at!

    Even thou I was in the corner trying to figure out a way to get Jessica’s number out of his phone so I could make late night uncomfortable calls, asking how small of a penis is too small, and how much money would it take for her to bath me while learning not to sing like you have a face full of moth balls!

    Other than that, he was not horribly awful, like Ron Jeremy.


  26. captain obvious

    I can’t even bring myself to watch this…I just…don’t…care.

  27. krystal710

    actually, I saw him at the cellar earlier this year.. he was a surprise guest and honestly I was hoping that he was going to sing.. but he said “no guys, I’m not singing” and proceeded to do the most bland stand up ever. not funny at all =] stick to the singin

  28. MissPMS

    His head has literally gotten bigger and bigger over the past few years.

  29. MissPMS

    His head has literally gotten bigger and bigger over the past few years.

  30. iamsosmart

    #5. Thank you. Exactly.

    I hate this geeky little bitch and this is coming from a girl. He is ugly and smug and the fucker has NOTHING to be smug about. Whenever I see him I just want to punch him in the face.

  31. Ex


    Get with the new stuff and stop just copying other sites (it’s bad when you have to copy perez hilton to get your news).

  32. SMRT?


    Could probably be smug about the fact that he got some Jessica Simpson tail… or that he plays a better guitar than anyone else to come out in the last 15 years

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