Joan Rivers Destroys Chelsea Handler
Not physically mind you. She actually looks like this.
“Joan Rivers? What the fuck do I care about Joan Rivers? I don’t think about her ever.”
Jump to Tuesday morning, when Joan stopped by Stern and proceeded to completely eat Chelsea’s lunch which had to have pissed Gwyneth Paltrow off considering she spent all morning at an organic winery pouring into an 18th century decanter. (Oh yeah, they’re besties.):
“Number one, the girl made it on her back fucking the president, we all know that, of the network. Number two, she’s fine, she’s ordinary. She’s not a genius,” Joan told Howard, referring to Chelsea’s past relationship with E! President Ted Harbert.
“She’s an ordinary girl that was fucking somebody high up in the industry and they gave her a break and she’s doing okay.”
“Whatever she is, she’s a drunk. I don’t wish her good luck, I don’t wish her bad luck,” Joan said.
“I don’t think she’s particularly funny. But don’t you come after me, you whore!”
For the record, that was Joan Rivers surgically dissecting Chelsea Handler’s entire career by showing a remarkable amount of resolve and vigor for an elderly woman forced to take Kelly Osbourne seriously for a living. This generation of “comediennes” would’ve died halfway through the first episode. They got no spunk.