Jessica Biel Wore This And Other News

August 14th, 2012 // 27 Comments

- Taylor Swift is stalking the Kennedys. [Lainey Gossip]

- Guys, sometimes we have just to have see things from their perspective. [theCHIVE]

- Kim Kardashian‘s divorce from her previous fake marriage is holding up her newest fake marriage. [Dlisted]

- The Texas A&M shooter was really into guns, Glenn Beck and.. Kingdom Hearts? [BuzzFeed]

- Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel are obviously taking turns looking the hottest. [Popoholic]

- Alec Baldwin is still an asshole. [Celebslam]

- Cheryl Tweedy (Cole, whatever.) looks hot even in a sweater. [Hollywood Tuna]

- Turtle is still scoring chicks. [TooFab]

- Nicole Trunfio topless, anyone? [DrunkenStepfather: Site is NSFW]

- Robert Pattinson rang the opening bell at the NYSE today which explains why you’re 401k put on eyeliner this morning. [Just Jared]

- John Travolta‘s receiving a “Golden Eye” award. Too.. many.. penis.. jokes.. [Starpulse]

- The Master is seriously not about Scientology, you guys. Now look at these pics where Joaquin Phoenix gets audited by a Scientologist. [FilmDrunk]

- Here’s how Twitter reacted to Kenny G‘s divorce. [HuffPost Celebrity]

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Photos: Getty

superficial

  1. cc

    Way to not leverage your assets.

  2. USDA Prime McBeef

    manzee face

  3. catapostrophe

    “Your 401k”.

  4. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s it girl. Come to papa!

  5. Colin

    Quote from the article in that Baldwin link:

    “Remember when the only people who read from the pulpit were kid-touchers? Can we go back to that? Because I’d rather get old priest goo injected into my lower intestine than listen to that pompous tool go on and on about how we can’t get to heaven unless we vote for Obama.”

    Fuck you, Celebslam

  6. Is it hot in here, or is it HER?

  7. Jessica Biel. A permanent fixture in my spank bank. She’s pretty fucking hot. Why is she not a bigger star than she already is?

    • Schmidtler

      because her face is horrific to look at, her personality is pure bitch, and she can’t act her way out of a wet paper bag. I’m guessing you put way too much stock in the power of a fabulous ass.

      • lily

        i dont get what is “horrific” about her face or why everyone thinks shes a butterface…she may be a talentless bitch but she has beautiful green eyes, full lips, and lovely skin…ive seen a lot worse

      • None of those things matter to the fapping community.

  8. tom

    I’d take Miley Cyrus over Jessica Biel any day.

  9. fuckityfuck

    *yawn* she’s so boooooring

  10. Guys, Horshack died! :(

  11. Surplus Nick

    Her picture is next to Butterface in the dictionary.

  12. Schmidtler

    What guy could take one look at her bitch face and not be scared shitless she’d cut his dick off the instant he got caught eyeing another broad’s tits? Run, JT, run for your fucking life!!!!!!

  13. lily

    shes gorgeous and her body is perfection!

  14. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    lily
    Commented on this photo:

    shes so gorgeous!!! how people think this is an unattractive face is beyond me

  15. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    Kojak
    Commented on this photo:

    Gorgeous…

  16. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    Kojak
    Commented on this photo:

    Perfect body…

  17. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah, I’m no hater but… this chick’s a little overrated.

    Have you seen her on The Daily Show? Even Jon Stewart couldn’t make an interview with her fun.

    She looks better in the next shot.

  18. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, see? Better from a distance.

  19. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    that is what i call a meaty ass

  20. Esol Esek

    Gorgeous, but comes with herpes.

  21. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    Ollie
    Commented on this photo:

    Looking pasty and bony; but flabby around the right elbow

  22. Jessica Biel Side Boob Total Recall Premiere
    Mee Mee
    Commented on this photo:

    ….and this fugly egomaniac thinks she doesn’t get hired because she’s “too beautiful”? GMAFB

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