Jeremy Clarkson Fired From ‘Top Gear’ Despite Massive Support From Idiots

“But cars I like go vroom! Tell that pussy whose face got punched not to be so punchable, so the thing I like doesn’t change!” – Idiots driving tanks to protests

Top Gear host Jeremy Clarkson just got fired after an investigation concluded that he verbally and physically abused a show producer. The report doesn’t include why the assault occurred, but apparently it had to do with cold cuts. Via Channel4:

Reports suggest the star had been unhappy at being unable to get hot food at Simonstone Hall Hotel near Hawes, North Yorkshire, where the crew were staying. The Sun and Mirror report the hotel’s chef had gone home by the time they arrived and the stars were offered cold meat platters, although the presenter requested steak.

At which point, Clarkson launched into a verbal tirade, eventually ending in punching show producer, Oisin Tymon, in the face, because Tymon should have paid more careful attention to the hotel food and beverage staff schedule which he surely controls, instead of, oh I dunno, producing a fucking TV show. This all resulted in Clarkson officially being fired, but before that was announced a calm, rational discussion occurred about violence in the workplace and how hero worship can lend itself to the turning of a blind eye. Just kidding! Top Gear’s dipshit fans drove a tank to BBC Headquarters. Via Jalopnik:

This is all part of the change.org petition that is meant to show support of Jeremy and has garnered one million signatures. The tank was used to transport the petition to the BBC to reinstate Clarkson from the no meal ‘fracas’ that got the host suspended last week.

To be totally honest, I’m not a gearhead in any way, but I live near places where they like to meet up on private property, act like complete shit-heads, then become outraged when they’re told to leave. It’s the same type of “Fuck you, I got ma’ raghts!” mentality that goes hand-in-hand with the Clarkson supporters, who are admittedly and fucking sadly over the million mark, and who’ve placed the blame for the vroom-vroom show they like ending on the guy who got his faced punched. “Why can’t the thing I want just be here, regardless of the consequences that thing may have for other people?!” Clarkson actually has a long history of acting like a bellend (which by the way, is now my fucking favorite insult, so thank you UK), from uttering racial slurs on the air, to insensitive statements about suicide, all of which has actually gotten chalked up to “That’s what makes the show great. He’s one of those guys who just says what everyone else is thinking, but is too scared to say.” That’s literally a quote from the threads in that article from just one of the frothing fans that can’t stand the fact that their favorite bully got shit-canned.

Top Gear is a wildly popular show which makes this move even more remarkable when contrasted by the decisions made by American networks, who won’t pull racist bigots or people who endanger their children from the airwaves so long as they’re still moving bobblehead units at truckstops. Blind hero worship had its time (paging Dr. Huxtable), but out of the dreck that comes along with the 24-hour news cycle also comes the scrutinization of once untouchable egomaniacs who choose public acceptance as their profession. What I’m saying, and I know this is probably hard to hear over your muffler cap or tank engine, is GO HOME, DUMMIES. IF THE THING YOU LIKE HURTS PEOPLE, YOU DON’T GET TO DO IT.

Photo: Xposure/AKM-GSI