“Motherfucker threw water on them?! DAAAMMNN.” (WINNER: Least Plausible Caption 2012)
What’s up, everybody? Thanks to my little schmoozing excursion to New York where I’ll let you decide whether I was Don, Pete or Roger Sterling (Trick Question: Cosgrove, bitches!), The Crap We Missed, our always reliable Most Important People comment generator hit the back-burner, so to make up ground before Photo Boy drops an epic Crap on us later today – Wow, this got erotic fast. – here’s Jamie Foxx and Samuel L. Jackson at the premiere of Django Unchained last night where one of them clearly thought this was a make-out party while the other made Don Johnson genuinely believe he was about to lose his cracker hand. Godspeed.
Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, Splash News, WENN
Tonight you’re the top, my little minx.
Oooo girl, you talking all sexy!
Samuel L. Jackson: Fist-bump Coach.
“Muthafucka, if you do ‘explode fingers,’ you gonna lose that hand. Try me.”
“So Anne Hathaway got out of the limo, and I was like “DAMN! She ain’t got no drawers on!”
“Word?”
90% and you let HIM go the remaining 10%…
“You show up to a premiere lookin’ like a member of the Aryan Brotherhood again, Imma rip that cornflower-blue tie off and jam it down your throat. Just keep smilin’, muthafucka, keep smilin’.”
Which one of these dudes was banging his granddaughter? or was that some other black guy?
“And then I said, right on national TV, ‘I got to kill all the white people in the movie’! And everyone in the audience laughed! And no one accused me of hate speech!”
“One time, I found a snake in my trailer.”
“A WHAT?!”
“Whaaaa! Ray Charles lives!!”
“Mmmm…minty fresh…you Mentos motha-fahka”
Kiss me, you fool
Foxx just showed Jackson the Gangsta Bieber pictures from this site.
This will be on the cover of The Advocate soon. Caption “Samuel Jackson is my lover”.
“What da fahk?! You’re not Micheal Stipe?!
beibs just crushed that bottle and his arms got all veiny and shit.
Jamie: “so I was on the plane, right, and out of the bag in front of my seat pops out a MUTHERFING SNAKE BEE”
Sam: “so what you do?”
Jamie: “we’ll I did what any reasonable block man in that situation would do….I stood up and yelled ‘I’m tired of this MUTHERFING SNAKES IN THIS MOTHERFING PLANE!’”
Sam: “word…..you wanna go gets some froyo?”
Jamie: “MOTHERFING YEAH!”
I thought black people like to keep it on the down-low
U played a motherfucking SLave…nIgga is you CRAZY?????????
“Dammit Crocket, just let Tubbs win at rock-paper-scissors for once in his goddamn life!”
Christoph Waltz says: I’m contractually obligated to be here.
Jules would not approve. He’d probably start quoting some shit from Leviticus and blow both your heads off.
Oh… well, now.
SHIIIITTTTT Brother, Obama’s the bomb I got all those dumbass liberal white muthafuckers to vote for his ass, man they some stupid crackers out there dog.
Y’know, Photo Boy, I didn’t say anything when you referred to the Museum of the Moving Image as “Museum of Moving Images” in the Anne Hathaway photo gallery. But “Danjo Unchained”? That’s just wrong, son. So wrong.
“Examine what you tolerate?!”
“Get a good whiff brotha”
[SNIFF] “Ooooooo that sheet’s good! Whaddat?”
“Das som fine white poonani.”
“Lemme get sumoh…” [SNIIIIIFFFFFFFFF] “Oooooeeee dat good.”
“That shit is fo REAL, yo!”
“Das reeeeeel goo… AAAAAAH!”
“Shit, man, whaddup? You scared the shit outta me!”
“There’s a motha fuckin’ floatin’ ghost head behind you! You kill someone to get that pussy?”
I thought only white gradeschool kids did rock paper scissors
Normally I do not read post on blogs, but I would like to say that this write-up very forced me to check out and do so! Your writing taste has been surprised me. Thank you, quite great post.
DjangHO!