Chins McJugs’ mother Darlene is throwing a hissy fit in the pages of Us Weekly and claims Spencer Pratt drugged Heidi which caused her to elope. Darlene gives the marriage six months and, God willing, will turn her anger into premeditated murder:
“He’s manipulative and seems to have power over Heidi,” Darlene Egelhoff, 46, told Us in an exclusive interview from her home in Crested Butte, Colorado the day after Montag, 22, blew off Thanksgiving with her family to stay with Pratt in Cabo San Lucas., the site of her Nov. 20 elopement. “I would like to see a blood test from Mexico. It wouldn’t surprise me if he had her drugged.”
“Spencer has tried to cut everyone out of her life,” Egelhoff tells Us. “I’ve been honest with Heidi, and it’s caused our relationship to decline. I’m more devastated about that than the marriage, because I’m confident the marriage won’t work out.”
“I think Spencer wants to possess Heidi more than marry her.” Adds Egelhoff – who famously fought with Pratt, 25, on The Hills: “God says love your enemies, but I never expected it to be my son-in-law.”
Not ones to miss out on a drop of free press, Heidi and Spencer were, of course, available for comment:
“She should be happy I found someone I love,” the bride tells Us. “Some people go their entire lives without finding that.”
Adds Pratt, who famously calls Egelhoff “Stalker Mom”: “I think her mom needs to take a real fat chill pill and be happy for her daughter.”
Okay, first off, Spencer Pratt should be beaten to death with a manhole cover just for saying his mother-in-law needs to take “a real fat chill pill.” That said, what a giant fucking publicity scam on everybody’s part. Here’s how I know:
1. If you recall, Mommy dearest was involved in one of the Douche Twins shitass photo shoots.
2. She’s giving an interview with Us Weekly who happened to purchase the exclusive rights to the wedding photos.
3. Heidi Montag came out of her vagina.
Am I perpetuating their little ruse by reporting on it? Hell to the fuck no. Because shortly after this post goes live, you guys are going to rip me a new anus for even talking about them thus making these jokers even less employable. Fingers crossed, this will lead to Heidi and Spencer living on the streets where I will then selflessly offer them a blanket covered in smallpox, AIDS and that really itch stuff that irritates your skin. What’s it called again? Right; napalm.
Spoonman | December 4, 2008 at 9:04 am
FIRST!
lindary | December 4, 2008 at 9:06 am
She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now? ?????????????????
lindary | December 4, 2008 at 9:07 am
She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now?
p911gt10c | December 4, 2008 at 9:08 am
I like her mom already.
Oh, and #1, you’re a loser.
missywissy | December 4, 2008 at 9:10 am
Heidi actually looks like a woman in these photos. Who cares if they’re married? They seem like a perfect couple Robogirl and Douchboy.
bar room hero | December 4, 2008 at 9:10 am
slag…
Rough Daddy | December 4, 2008 at 9:11 am
*chins mc juggs*
Come on superfish thats something you call your enemies! but funny though
even thought i dont like what she does, chick’s sexy as hell! lose the gowns heidi!
Rough Daddy | December 4, 2008 at 9:15 am
and the freaking lip injections!!!
Elliot_Spitz_On_Her | December 4, 2008 at 9:15 am
I had no idea they have “stupid” in pill form.
Mini Cantrell | December 4, 2008 at 9:17 am
Okay, 1 Superficial writer you are FIRED!!. 2, The Pratt Family should be Homeless,3. You owe us a TON of NSFW goodies to make up for the sin of posting these 2 dushebags at all!!!
Now Be a Good Boy and post some pics of Kims ass!
Lola | December 4, 2008 at 9:18 am
WHO FUCKING CARES?????
This stupid bitch doesn’t even look real anymore… Her entire face looks plastic and her boobs are disgusting. Such a shame that at such a young age, she’s had so many surgeries. By the times she’s 30, she’ll look like that cat-lady woman
veggi | December 4, 2008 at 9:22 am
Spend that $500 wisely, Fish.
Satan's Freezer Maintenance Guy | December 4, 2008 at 9:24 am
Dammit, stop reporting on these wastes of oxygen! I come to this site for three reasons:
1) To see pictures of naked chicks
2) To read funny/interesting stuff about people I’ve actually heard of
3) To read horrific stories about people I hate and laugh at them
So, until Heidi starts flashing some T&A, or one/both of them are executed by terrorists, I don’t want to hear it.
Please keep your promise not to post anything about them. Don’t you know every time these two get some press Baby Jesus cries?
morga | December 4, 2008 at 9:31 am
What #13 said
Quit posting these wastes of oxygen
britney's weave | December 4, 2008 at 9:34 am
their “wedding rings” are hideous.
Tapeworm | December 4, 2008 at 9:34 am
Plastic tits are funny.
Also, she looks like she’s about 40 in these photos.
lindary | December 4, 2008 at 9:47 am
She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now? ?????????????????
havoc | December 4, 2008 at 9:48 am
Here’s a thought….
How about they keep the fucking conversation private?
Talking to your mother through Us Weekly is ridiculous.
.
Pee Wee From Porky's | December 4, 2008 at 9:56 am
I still think Spencer looks like Pee Wee from Porky’s. Him and Will Smith would make a nice couple.
timmy | December 4, 2008 at 10:02 am
That would be sooo awesome if it turned out that Heidi did a few scenes for Blacksonblondes.com when she was 18.
timmy | December 4, 2008 at 10:02 am
That would be sooo awesome if it turned out that Heidi did a few scenes for Blacksonblondes.com when she was 18.
Jon | December 4, 2008 at 10:02 am
“Am I perpetuating their little ruse by reporting on it? Hell to the fuck no. Because shortly after this post goes live, you guys are going to rip me a new anus for even talking about them thus making these jokers even less employable.”
That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard, just stop reporting on them.
rosha | December 4, 2008 at 10:08 am
Is Heidi in a bikini?? NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TexasTruthWilliams | December 4, 2008 at 10:11 am
And she is who?
Missy | December 4, 2008 at 10:13 am
Spencer is such a douche bag! He is so rude to Heidi’s family for NO reason! I can’t wait til his 10 mins of fame are over….
b | December 4, 2008 at 10:27 am
i would lick her butthole.
Me | December 4, 2008 at 10:35 am
Anyone posting after Me sucks on Spencer Pratt’s cock
mink | December 4, 2008 at 10:50 am
hate it
Donkey Dick | December 4, 2008 at 10:57 am
Fish,
You are a complete sell out. You’re losing your base by pulling shit like this.
snot | December 4, 2008 at 11:00 am
Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag should seriously just… Go away. They are absolutely deplorable and it’s clear to see that no one likes them.
So why don’t we just… I dunno… Boycott posting about them?
It’s posts like these that keep them around, ya know… :\
timmy the dying boy | December 4, 2008 at 11:16 am
Drugged her? How the hell would anyone tell the difference?
And it’s obvious that Mexican Cracker Jack boxes still have rings as prizes.
timmy the dying boy | December 4, 2008 at 11:17 am
Drugged her? How the hell would anyone tell the difference?
And it’s obvious that Mexican Cracker Jack boxes still have rings as prizes.
gotmilk? | December 4, 2008 at 11:22 am
drugged her? who is this mom trying to be, Lynn Spears?
and is that suppose to be her wedding ring? it looks just as cheap at that “engagement” ring he bought her.
and she does look 40. fucking hag. get some more work done, it really does you wonders.
ummm...yeah | December 4, 2008 at 11:26 am
Look Fish, you fuckin Spencer Pratt cocksuckin pick,
QUIT FUCKIN POSTIN ABOUT THESE TWO ASSFUCKS!
Who fucking CARES!!!
You should be fired, asshole!!!
What, do you get a kickback from them for posting about every little insignifigant fucking thing they do?!
Does Heidi promise to suck your non existant cock?
So much for your fuckin PROMISE not to post about these two fuckin idiots again.
You had better get on the ball asswipe or you’re gonna lose alot of us.
Geoff | December 4, 2008 at 11:28 am
And we give a sh*t about this idiots because… Bueller, Bueller?
combustion8 | December 4, 2008 at 11:30 am
how come no one’s beaten this guy to death yet? seriously.
Kelly | December 4, 2008 at 11:34 am
I’m not gonna lie, I like reading about them, mainly because I hate them so much. And these guys who get on here “to look at pictures of hot chicks”, please. You love the stories and so do I. Please keep ripping these two apart, its hilarious.
missywissy | December 4, 2008 at 12:07 pm
Wow! Nice ring! Wal-Mart has those in the Mary-Kate and Ashley section.
Sorry, but this is the best I’ve seen her look. Not that I even know why she’s famous. This is the only place I’ve ever seen her.
Gerry | December 4, 2008 at 12:08 pm
I thought you promised you wouldn’t talk about these… I actually stopped for a minute to look of a substitue word for people but gave up.
Please, there must be another event or some other exposed nipple for you to replace them with each day. You don’t have to report on them just cause everyone else does. TAKE A STAND SUPERFICIAL!
Subsannatrix | December 4, 2008 at 12:50 pm
That yellow hair yarmulke she’s wearing doesn’t match her Clairol color at all.
yuck | December 4, 2008 at 1:09 pm
butterface!!!!!!!!!
Grandpa | December 4, 2008 at 1:44 pm
Whoever says she is sexy needs to really think about it!! She looks like a friggin’ horse. I wish she would just walk into on coming traffic and get hit by a bus!
Chins McJuggs | December 4, 2008 at 1:46 pm
STOP! NO MORE PRESS for these TWITS! The mother is in on the whole charade too. Her outrage about the marriage made you write this article, therefor getting them press.
PunkA | December 4, 2008 at 1:58 pm
MTV and The Hills producers have sunk to all all-time low in trying to promote a TV show. Creating fake drama on a bogus reality show is one thing. But trying to somehow legitimize it in the media and promote it as real is another. The lines are really blurring on this “reality” TV show into farse. I say it is time to boycott MTV, The Hills, and anything to do with these 2. And boycot Fish if he posts about them again. After all, Fish promised not to. Liar. you are part of this now, Fish. You ass.
Slaappy | December 4, 2008 at 2:42 pm
Why the longest face in the world Heidi, you just got married?
justifiable | December 4, 2008 at 3:04 pm
Obviously stupidity is hereditary in the Montag family. Too bad abortion isn’t a cherished family tradition. Sometimes I long for eugenics, I really do.
Yeyé! | December 4, 2008 at 3:21 pm
me enkanTa esta Pagina!!
aunke la vdd No entiendo muxo
el ingles!!
mmm…La vdd No me guzta muxo esta chica pero bue!
weno…dejo Bso!
Matthew | December 4, 2008 at 3:40 pm
who cares about miss douche superfical stop breaking your promise
Jaee | December 4, 2008 at 4:13 pm
Your plan better work.
Kahlee | December 4, 2008 at 6:01 pm
hahahahaha, napalm. You’re so cute fish.