Heidi Montag: ‘I Made All That Sh*t Up’

February 11th, 2011 // 110 Comments

Presumably after Sony called and threatened to repossess her new body, here’s Heidi Montag walking back her claim that Jennifer Aniston banned her from the premiere of Just Go With It. Via Us Magazine:

“I read that Jennifer had banned me from the premiere for being too polarizing, but I know now that it wasn’t true,” Montag tells Us. “It never really made sense to me because Jennifer is such a sweetheart and she even commented before on a red carpet about how interesting and fun it was to have me in the movie.”
“I got my invite and I would have loved to be there, but I had to be Los Angeles with my dogs,” Montag explained. “I was honored to be a part of such a great movie and I apologize to Jennifer and Sony for this big misunderstanding. Go see the movie this weekend! It’s fantastic!”

So basically Heidi had no intention of showing up in the first place but figured, “Eh, I’ll blame Jennifer Aniston. What the hell?” Which is why that squeaking sound you just heard was Heidi being shoved into a locker next to the seventh Pitt-Jolie kid. Oh, they’ll say there was a never seventh one, but who wants to admit it was that easy to snatch one off the front porch? Also, it’s not like there’s a shortage of Vietnamese kids. Let’s be honest.

Photos: Pacific Coast News


  1. i’d love to have my balls bouncing off that beautiful chin…

  2. atotalcad

    read it? she said it!
    She’s about as sharp as a marble.

  3. jumpin_j

    She made all that up? I’m shocked. SHOCKED I SAY! (and first)

  4. Silvio Burlisconni

    I’m planning a Bunga Bunga party, and she is going to feast on my bunga

  5. gigi

    There goes her “movie career”. She’ll never be hired now.

  6. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    She re minds me of my inflatable sex doll. I wonder which one has more plastic. I would still creampie this though…

  7. Danny

    She looks like a Real Doll.

    But the Real Doll has a better personality.

  8. She re minds me of my inflatable sex doll. I wonder which one has more plastic. I would still creampie this though…

  9. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like shit in the face. Too much plastic surgery.

  10. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    ….and she has a horse face….

  11. Cock Dr

    She’s fake. She’s dumb. She’s not very interesting. She has no talent. She’s married to one of the biggest douchebags on planet Earth.
    And she’s not even very pretty……and after all that work.

    • Marley

      I was just thinking that! You would think that someone who got oodles of work done would put a little more makeup on her ugly mug.

  12. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    “Say it ain’t so, I could lose my top….or my nose, it’s still up in the air at this point”

  13. Superficial Bitch

    I’m no doctor, but that first pic makes it look like she has a horrible thighroid problem.

  14. Ugh..just go ahead and do porn already Heidi…

  15. Candice

    Can we ban her and her douchey homeless gay husband from the site again? I thought this trick’s 15 minutes were up last year… I’m gonna vom if I have to look at that fugly wildabeast’s face again.

  16. Hilarious...

    So, the bitch admits that she lied, eh? Gee, her making stuff up to get attention is par for the course. EXCEPT, she blew it; she had a chance to stop being a “reality TV” person & transition to films, and she’s flubbed it. She pulled her typical suckass reality tv bullshit lying attention whoring, but that doesn’t really work in the big game; people at that level remember when you lie about them & will exert influence to keep you out of their area. I suspect this will be the last time she’s ever in a film except for a cut rate z list tv movie or porn…

  17. She’s like a blonde Kim Kardashian. Just fucking useless.

  18. Bucky Barnes

    Of course Heidi is polarizing. Just look at Spencer, that boy can’t get his fill of poles…

  19. JRS

    How is it a misunderstanding when she apparently had to be with her dogs?

  20. I cannot wait until she is over.

  21. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    fap fap fap

  22. hmna

    Heidi is pure seduction in these pics.


  23. Gilberator

    I bet she smells like plastic and regret.

  24. Ex-President Hosni Mubarak

    I would like to meet the whore slut Heidi Montag and possible force her to have dinner with me at an undisclosed location, where she will be forced to engage me in pleasant and threatening conversations about how great I am, or was, and after that she will be lead, at gunpoint, to my bedroom where she will remark, under protest, at how amazingly large my manhood is. I am also looking forward to appearing on Dancing With Some “Famous” People, So You Think You Can Stumble, American Desperate, The Boring Long Race, and whatever else my agent Baby Doll Dixon can book me on. And no I don’t do table reads.

    • Cock Surgeon*

      Sounds good Ex-President Mubarak. May I suggest that you change your first name to Jose? (Because that’s what I think I hear every time someone in the media says “Hosni.”)

      *I specialize in glans amputation. Call now to make an appointment: 1-866-No-Glans

    • pacific rim

      “engage me in pleasant and threatening conversations” yeeeahhh….you can’t front that…symptomatic of your entire post – trying too hard, yo.

  25. bitingontinfoil

    It’s tragic her plastic surgeons haven’t yet come up with a “brain implant”.

    Chick needs *serious* psychological help.

    • Ribbet

      Her plastic surgeon drove off a cliff while taking photos of his dog and texting…he died, the dog survived. After he died she dissed him….nice.

  26. Jason, Hannibal, and OJ

    Die, bitch, die.

  27. I thought Spencer would have had Heidi crate trained by now, or the other way around.

  28. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Honest Abe
    Commented on this photo:

    We hate her, but who among us would not tap that? Banging a dumb, large breasted blonde is the American way!

  29. Mortimer Duke

    Another proud graduate of the Kim Kardashian school of public speaking. When in trouble, back-track on the double! Other graduates include Kim herself and Tara Reid.

  30. Hank

    She looked better before the last round of plastic surgery — but Man With No Name is right, she is a living sex doll. Which means she would be pure physical pleasure in bed. She’ll do it every which way you want. Yowza!

  31. sue

    She should have just said “Oh, i’m so sorry, i read that somewhere and believed it, and i never should have. Jennifer Aniston is a wonderful person, and i am sorry if my words put her in a bad light”. But this moron threw in the part about her dogs, which pretty much is admitting she made up the story to put Jennifer in a bad light and gain attention and sympathy for herself. Good luck finding a job now, Dummy.

  32. Sam

    Honestly man, please, just STOP posting about this crazy biach. I don’t think I can hate her anymore than I already do, and I honestly DON’T CARE wtf crap falls out of her mouth/anus.

  33. suck it

    “I got my invite and I would have loved to be there, but I had to be Los Angeles with my dogs,” Montag explained.

    This is your first “acting” in a movie can’t attend the premiere because you have to be with your dogs????
    What a dumb ass. I wish her, the Lohans, Tila Tequila, and Spencer would just go away already. And I love trashy celebrities and train wrecks. But this is just getting annoying.

    • babooda

      Read: “I couldn’t go because they wouldn’t let my “dog”, Spencer anywhere near the proceedings.” Come on, you know that is the real reason she didn’t attend!

  34. Does anyone else think she’d look hilarious – but somehow “right” – with a candle wick sticking out of the top of her head? She’d go up like the friggin’ Fourth of July – it’d be awesome.

    • babooda

      I’d save her for Christmas Eve to light Santa’s way to my house with the attractive blond he always brings me….

  35. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    Wake up, guys. Why are you even bothering to read the words in this post? The post is here for one reason only — to look at the pics and decide exactly where you would bust your nut on her. My choice: directly under her nostrils.

  36. Biff

    Wake up, guys. Why are you even bothering to read the words in this post? The post is here for one reason only — to look at the pics and decide exactly where you would bust your nut on her. My choice: directly under her nostrils.

  37. Don’t care. Just don’t care.

    I didn’t even read the typically witty and amusing words of my fellow blog-commenter jackholes because nothing about this subject could possibly be amusing, interesting, or otherwise worthy of anyones time. Except those of you reading THIS…you guys are idiots.

  38. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    she goes through all this trouble before she masturbates?

  39. Nen

    Has anyone else noticed she’s holding that glass of wine like she has a crab claw for a hand? wtf?

    • babooda

      She does have a crab claw for a hand….it was one of the plastic surgery changes she made to her body!

  40. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘I can’t take it anymore, I’m taking a cyanide pill…”

  41. babooda

    Well,Well…Heidi came down from her plastic surgery induced high long enough to realize that attacking Jennifer Aniston was probably not the smartest career move she ever made.
    Granted Aniston may not be Angelina Jolie in terms of clout, but she does have some friends who do have that kinda influence in Hollyweird.
    I’d say it is “Bye Bye, Baby!” for Heidi’s movie career, unless she steps it up and does some good old fashioned hardcore pornography. She would do good with her over-sized tits in the “Big Tit Porno” marketplace and she actually might get some value out of her many surgeries. Big Tit porno-hounds love plasticized bimbos!

    • Jester

      +1, I don’t hate this chick as much as most, I still fantasize that she will do porn and me, but man how stupid can you be to take that angle, the retraction is even worse.

  42. Photoshop Police

    … now entering minute 973 of her 15 minutes.

    Two posts about this vapid nobody in the same day?!?!?

    Just stop already.

  43. Michael Jackson

    I hope Heidi’s prosthetic nose doesn’t fall in her Jesus Juice… I hate when that happens.

  44. jojo

    I have said it before and i will say it again, its my stock comment on anything Heidi. U S E L E S S W H O R E.

  45. groucho

    why you guys print her comments as a real story in the first place is beyond me. she lies. then she admits she lies. she gets double coverage of a non event, a phony beef. like you couldn’t see this coming. are there actual people at this gossip rag? or do manatees choose the stories with beachballs?

  46. Great career move dumbass – piss off a major movie star. Just send your headshot to Vivid and get it over with.

  47. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    What a fat, ugly bitch. She needs more plastic surgery, not less. Any chance she read this site and will be pushed over the edge? Best not to take any chances. What a fucking cow!

  48. Heidi Montag Jennifer Aniston
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve never seen you looking so whorish as you did tonight.
    I’ve never seen you shine so bright.
    I’ve never seen so many men ask you if your tits were real.
    They’re looking for a little free press.
    Given half a chance.
    And I’ve never seen that dress you’re not wearing.
    Or that highlights in your hair that match your new eyes.
    I am now blind.
    The whore in red is dancing with me.
    Cheek to plastic cheek.

  49. Chicago_animal

    75% Plastic, Not that hot, stupid, spent majority of her money on a music career that never took off…time for that porn tape to “leak”

  50. Ednonymous

    She just killed any hope of ever getting any movie extra work.

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