Heidi Klum Got Sunburn On Her Butt, Wants You To Look At It

The Superficial / July 8, 2013

Heidi Klum spent the weekend in the Bahamas where she apparently burnt her ass tanning which is amazing because I could’ve sworn Gwyneth Paltrow just said the sun’s our natural friend who could never hurt us. In fact, I bet that’s not even sunburn at all. That’s a moonburn! How much is that cratered bastard paying you to spread his lies? *punches Heidi’s butt* WHERE IS HE?! WHERE’S THE TRIGGER?! *punches again* HE HAS TO HAVE FRIENDS! (Why am I writing a post where I punch Heidi Klum’s ass while talking like Batman? This can’t be healthy.) I’LL STAND BETWEEN YOU AND GOTHAM. *puts on lipstick*

Photos: Instagram / Pacific Coast News