Happy Holidays!

December 24th, 2008 // 106 Comments

Before I scoot off for the holidays, here’s Mariah Carey rocking clown boots and cleavage despite the freezing temperatures in Aspen. Somewhere there’s an inspirational message to be found here, I can almost feel it. – - Nope, just my monitor. False alarm!

The Superficial shall return this weekend where my words will swaddle you like the newborn baby Jesus. In the meantime, hopefully you get some sweet gifts to tide you over. If not, at least you aren’t Nick Cannon: Human Terrier above. No one deserves that.

Happy Holidays, everybody!

superficial

  1. Happy Holidays… too

  2. She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she singe now?

  3. CUTIE

    WOW, THAT EGG NOG WAS STRONG LAST NIGHT. I APPOLOGIZE FOR THE OUTBURST. I WAS JUST PISSED BECAUSE I SPENT CHRISTMAS ALONE AND WISH I HAD A FINE LOOKING BLACK MAN LIKE NICK TO RIDE. SO, I GOT DRUNK, RUBBED ONE OUT AND TOOK IT OUT ON ALL OF YOU. IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL ANY BETTER, I WOKE UP WITH A KILLER HANGOVER AND CAN’T FIND MY PHONE. YES, I ALSO HAVE TO CALL AND APPOLOGIZE TO MY EX. I SURE HOPE I DIDN’T THROW THE BLACKBERRY INTO THE SNOW. DAMN, I’M SUCH A MESS.

  4. scabbeus

    Word is that they are going to start recording together. Sony recently signed them to a deal and they will record as…”Screech and Pencil D”!

  5. nastyjay

    i dont know wtf ya talkin about.
    i wanna be her smash action hero

  6. The Truth

    Shut up CUTIE. I’ll bet your an ugly niggress, not a cutie. And learn to type without shouting you stupid bitch. No one wants a whore like Mariah. I guess whores stick together so you had to stick up for her.

  7. vote for me and il suck your cock

  8. vote for me and il suck your cock

  9. Sport

    Every time she goes out its a desperate LOOK AT ME moment. What a vapid woman – someone please tell her she jumped the shark 5 years ago and is no longer relevant.

  10. Pathetic Worm

    TIT FOR TWAT

  11. Fantastic blog!

    Congratulations from Portugal!

  12. Pathetic Worm

    TWIT FOR TAT

  13. Pathetic Worm

    SHIT FOR SHAT

  14. Pathetic Worm

    CLIT FOR CLOT

  15. Damn.
    Her boobs don’t know how cold it is outside anyway. She can’t feel them. This is sad. Mariah used to be the best voice in the industry, then she just went bat shit crazy. And I wonder just how old Nick Cannon is going to be when his nuts finally drop and he stops following this crazy bitch around like a lap dog. God, I bet his parents cry themselves to sleep every night. She’s obviously insane, but you stupid fucks that are calling her fat and ugly are just as batty. She’s like 40. I wouldn’t mind looking like that at 30(save for the god awful boots). I’d be willing to bet that she looks 20x better than the vast majority of women who post here. And she would be unattainable for most of the male posters even if she wasn’t as rich as Jesus.

  16. Balls McCoy

    Pardon my eloquence on a site such as this but…

    I’d just love the fuck the shit out of her.

  17. Pathetic Worm

    HAIRY HOPPYDAYS!

  18. Guest

    Why does she still think she’s famous?
    Nobody cares about her
    && nobody wants to listen to her
    songs ‘Ohhhh ahhhh oh yeahhhh oooooh’

    She looks really stupid && she definantly
    needs to start acting her age.

  19. Guest

    Why does she still think she’s famous?
    Nobody cares about her
    && nobody wants to listen to her
    songs ‘Ohhhh ahhhh oh yeahhhh oooooh’

    She looks really stupid && she definantly
    needs to start acting her age.

  20. AmberDextrose

    Moonboots of neon red fake fur with built-in static. Mm. Tasty. Presumably this is some new anti-counterfeit measure by Dior. Ha, those fakers will never be able to make something as nasty as this!

  21. Taquini'sha

    Mariah’s pussy probably smells like chili that has been vomited out. After Nig Cannon is done with it it also has a hint of monkey hair and ox tail.

  22. Cornelius

    DIOR MOONBOOTS. That’s all I’m saying. Reminds me of those pics of Victoria Beckham and Dior Skis. That bitch probably doesn’t even ski.

    Also, look at that douchebag’s tilted woolly hat + oakley glasses combo.

  23. One of the biggest douches off all time! Of course I speak of the rough one. Makes me believe he is old, as douchebags get rough with age.

  24. Jeremy

    number 4 is the funniest comment ever. Props.

  25. wbaaaaah and remember Backwood bitch you will always be ROugh’s Bitch…

  26. Yo Momma

    Happy Kwanzaa Bitches!

  27. Yo Momma

    Happy Kwanzaa Bitches!

  28. Yo Momma

    Happy Kwanzaa Bitches!

  29. ReelWorld

    I love how the little clown is wearing ski goggles – and sideways at that – while he totes around her shopping.

    Matching jackets too! How sweet.

    Am I the only one who thinks that kid is waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too young to be getting married – much less to her!? What the hell were they thinking? The pics look like she’s doin the rounds at Xmas and some skinny black kid just happened into one of the shots!? The look on Urkel’s face in that first pic is like “Who is this crazy bitch and why is she hugging me?”

  30. Cash

    Dude, if you’re not actually snowboarding, take off the FUCKING goggles!!! I wish someone would just curb stomp his metro-sexual ass already.

  31. crazy women are great fucks … Mariah is nuts therefore a great fuck…she can use me to sit on her face anytime then I would fuck the shit out of her asshole and pussy … her husband is just a shill.. just a cover she needs a hard fuck from a real man.. email me or stop by and I will eat and lick until Mariah’s teeth sweat….

  32. Oh yeah by the way I would love to eat and lick Mariah on stage in front of about a milllion people while she performed oral gratificaiton upon my male member…Mariah remeber I am just as crazy oral and open as you ……….your hubby is just plain

  33. So.
    I watched the news today – Oh Boy
    Hundreds killed today – there was an army and air force targeting defenseless civilians….
    (Kinda reminded me of 9/11.)
    But I personwooly -
    Woke up, fell out of bed
    Dragged a comb across my head…
    Found my way downstairs and drank a cup…
    And then visited my friend ‘Frank’ from 16th floor, and we had a little bit of popcorn.

  34. missywissy

    Okay, the pic of them together was like a “Heidi and Spencer” moment for me. Set up. So sad indeed.
    Mariah Carey is a song bird, the girl has legs, she IS youthful “looking” but…… I don’t get this whole ghetto thing with her. Why is she putting herself on this level purposefully? Her entire image right now seems like the phoniest thing I’ve ever seen her do. I agree with a poster that said she carries herself better when she dresses classy.

    By the way, her being married to Nick Cannon reminds me of Will Smith and Jadda Pinkett. Set up. I’m pretty sure Mariah and Nick were married in the Bahamas and that reminds me of Anna Nicole and what’s his name. They got married there and it was never deemed an official marriage.

    One more thing. All this baby Jesus stuff… I hope this too is a fad. It makes me uncomfortable. Can’t folks come up with something more creative?

  35. #88 Gr8 points all.
    You obviously seem like a real ‘intellectual’
    So….by the way….
    Inside job ?
    Having any problems with ‘free fall collapse speed through undamaged steel structure’? You know….
    That type of thing… Comments ?
    (Of course I am on Hong Kong time. Can stay late for response )

  36. Goddamn obvious

    Shit fuck and fuckall. Dumb fuckin’ mondays. For one, can’t put his cap straignt and secondly wears his goddam goggles sideways. What the fuck is that shit about. Stupid goddam shitheads. Fuckin’ mondays.

  37. Asshole

    Fish, seriously why the fuck these two douchefuckers? No one gives a flying fuck. Get some news. Peace.

  38. friendlyfires

    Breaking news:Nick “The Stop Gap” Cannon threw himself beneath what most scientist categorize as a once in every 500 years avalanche, so destructive it obliterates forests, cities, counties even a stadium of Barack Obama supporters, only to have the tumultuous snow pile throw his sorry cursed ass up to the top of the pile. Rescuers found him on top, writhing, kicking and convulsing, “WHY? WHY? WHY DOES THE UNIVERSE HATE ME SO? WHY? WHY? WHY??” Oddly enough, Tommy Mottola was standing nearby, pointing furiously, smoking a two foot cigar and giggling hysterically.

  39. gorgehu1

    I am a chinese college teacher, if you want to buy chinese handiwork, speciality, goods etc. for yourself or as gifts to your boyfriends, girlfriends, parents, juniors and so on. Even though one piece, I can help you in china, commission is 2 %, and part of the commission will be given to the poor children. Please send your information to gorgehu1@live.cn or talk with me through msn messenger. Include buying for you, investment, management, hotel, amendment, marketing, analysis, program, translation, etc.

  40. gorgehu1

    I am a chinese college teacher, if you want to buy chinese handiwork, speciality, goods etc. for yourself or as gifts to your boyfriends, girlfriends, parents, juniors and so on. Even though one piece, I can help you in china, commission is 2 %, and part of the commission will be given to the poor children. Please send your information to gorgehu1@live.cn or talk with me through msn messenger. Include buying for you, investment, management, hotel, amendment, marketing, analysis, program, translation, etc.

  41. Seriously, I am just amazed that they are still together. Wishing them well.

  42. STevec

    she still has the face of Curious George, the cartoon chimp

  43. LindaLou

    No instead of dressing the dog in costume she can dress her son, I mean husband.

  44. LindaLou

    Ha! I didnt read the text first or I would have realized the joke had already been made.

  45. Knock Knock

    I always thought she needed help but i dislike her more now when I personally met someone who she treated like crap. I guess she forgot where she came from.People like that don’t deserve what they got.Even royalties don’t act like these idiots do.We need to stop feeding them for sure.We should feed the hungry instead.

  46. missywissy

    @89- Nobody would accept the truth, even it were proven over and over, time and time again. 9/11 is like another soundbyte in history. US citizens are dumbed down to accept events like these so the government can further their own agenda and the people will fight for it under the code of “freedom”. I have my thoughts, but not an “intellectual”.

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