Gwyneth Paltrow Named People’s Most Beautiful Woman, Organic Scone Bribery Suspected

People magazine is apparently in the trolling business now because they just announced Gwyneth Paltrow as their 2013 World’s Most Beautiful Woman knowing full well everyone would go, “Wait, the child-starving plutocrat who thinks she can say nigger because her husband sang that song with Beyonce’s husband? That Gwyneth Paltrow?” To which People will reply, “Why, yes, isn’t she lovely?” then excuse itself and laugh for 20 minutes in the bathroom because, c’mon, who didn’t see the religion shelf?

The Middle East, that’s who. HOLY ALLAH, LOOK WHAT SHE DID TO THE QU’RAN!

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